


Crash and Burn

by nerdcredred, Ocelot_l



Series: Lifetimes [40]
Category: Atop the Fourth Wall, That Guy with the Glasses/Channel Awesome
Genre: Death, Drug Use, Hallucinations, Heavy Angst, M/M, Mind Control, Multi, References to Drug Use, References to past death, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, allusions to sex, graphic blood, mild sexual activity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-17
Updated: 2015-05-17
Packaged: 2018-03-30 22:48:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 71,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3954772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerdcredred/pseuds/nerdcredred, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ocelot_l/pseuds/Ocelot_l
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Linkara learns about a devastating new weapon which could destroy lives if it falls into the wrong hands, he and his team must prepare for a mission harder than any they’ve faced before. When challenges threaten their lives and their ties of friendship, will they manage to save the world, and, most importantly, themselves?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> All works can also be found at my LiveJournal page at http://bookishlady242.livejournal.com/
> 
> Written for the Secret Treehouse 2015 TGWTG Big Bang. Bonus content for the fic can be found at my LJ account.
> 
> DISCLAIMER: We do not own the characters, the shows, or the people who portray the characters. This is meant as a work of fiction and is fair use. Please support the creators by watching their videos, letting the ads play, buying their DVDs and merchandise, and/or contributing to their Patreon(s). "Crash and Burn" is performed by Savage Garden.

Dan blinked a few times at the sunlight reflecting off the freshly fallen snow as he and 90s Kid walked outside. It was a rather cool January day, but Dan welcomed the rush of crisp air against his cheeks as he moved along the sidewalk. Usually when he finished one of his Narcotics Anonymous meetings he’d feel a bit restless and in need of room to breathe, and there was nothing like a pleasant walk home after said meetings to help settle his nerves. 

Dan turned to smile at 90s Kid as they drew closer to the edge of the city. “Thanks again for attending that meeting with me, sweetie. I hope it wasn’t too boring for you.”

“Nah, it was fine,” 90s Kid replied, kicking a bit of snow out of the way with his foot. Even though it had been a little boring to listen to a bunch of strangers droning on about their lives, 90s Kid hadn’t minded it that much. He knew how important it was for Dan to continue attending these sessions despite the fact that he’d been sober for over a year now. “So like, you go to these things every week?”

“Yep,” Dan said, sliding his hands into his pockets. “Sometimes I go two or three times a week.” 90s Kid’s eyebrows rose up a few centimeters but he said nothing. Dan, however, always picked up on his boyfriend’s moods and let out a weak chuckle. “Yeah, that does seem like a lot. You’d think after all this time I’d be stronger at fighting back the cravings, but strength was never one of my best qualities.”

90s Kid stopped in his tracks and turned to Dan, wrapping his arms around the smaller man. “Dan, don’t. You are strong, so totally strong,” he said as he hugged Dan close to him. “You haven’t done anything with drugs in a totally long time, so that proves just how strong you are.”

Dan at once wrapped his arms back around 90s Kid, soaking in as much of the taller man as he could. “I’m only strong because I have you, Kid.”

90s Kid pressed his lips against Dan’s forehead, trying to bolster his confidence. “You’d be strong even without me, Dan. I know you would.”

Dan pulled back a bit and sighed, looking downwards at the sidewalk. “That’s not exactly true, Kid. Part of NA is being able to own up to and admit your mistakes, and I came dangerously close to relapsing during that time when you were pulled into the future. It was only because of 2090s Kid-”

90s Kid silenced him again with another kiss. “That was because of you. You didn’t have to stop because of him, Dan. You were strong enough to say no on your own, and that’s why I’m so totally proud of you, dude.”

Dan finally allowed himself to smile and he slipped his hand into 90s Kid’s as they walked along the street together. “Is it still really that hard to keep away from that junk?” 90s Kid asked, unable to contain his curiosity. 

Dan nodded, watching as the breath came from their mouths in puffs of smoke. “Some days it’s just as hard to resist as the first day I quit, Kid. But I’m going to keep on resisting it, because I don’t need that anymore.”

Dan pulled 90s Kid down a different street than they would normally take to return to his house, but 90s Kid was enjoying their walk so he followed along without complaint. He looked around and was a bit surprised to discover a lot of new, model homes sporting signs for open houses. “Why did we come down this way, Dan?”

“Oh, heh, well, sometimes I just like walking down this road,” Dan said softly. 90s Kid was surprised to see a hint of pink in his cheeks that he didn’t think was from the cold. Dan didn’t usually get embarrassed about anything, but he seemed to be breathing a bit quickly, so 90s Kid gently squeezed his hand and smiled at him. 

“You can tell me why. I won’t laugh at you.”

“I know you won’t.” Dan glanced up at him lovingly before turning his gaze to their surroundings. “I like to walk down here and imagine that I’m looking for a house. Our house.” Dan’s voice seemed to grow even softer but his words remained steady. “On really bad days, when the meetings aren’t enough, I come down here and walk up and down the street, trying to imagine us in each house. It sounds so silly when I say it, but it’s really soothing to think about that. And I know that some won’t work for us: that one’s too small,” he said, pointing to a yellow one on the left, “that one doesn’t have a pool,” he pointed to a larger blue one across the street, “but this one…” Dan paused to look up at a towering white estate of at least three stories.“This one is just perfect. If we were to suddenly win the lottery in the next few weeks, that is.”

“Pfff, dude, if I win the lottery, I’m totally buying Kurt Cobain’s house for us,” 90s Kid replied, causing Dan to laugh. 90s Kid grinned and squeezed his hand again, since cheering Dan up when he was feeling low was one of the things he did best. “But I know what you’re saying, dude, and thinking about stuff like this totally isn’t silly,” he reassured him. “Although I think you got it wrong.” Dan’s eyebrows were the ones to rise this time as 90s Kid’s smile grew wider. “Any house we live in is going to be the perfect house, even if it’s small and doesn’t have a pool or a backyard with a tree fort or even any electricity. It’ll still be perfect because it’ll be a house just for you and me, Dan.”

Dan sniffled a bit and 90s Kid pulled him close again. “You’re right, Kid. Any house for the two of us is good with me. I love you so much and I can’t wait to live with you.”

“I can’t wait either, Dan. I want to always be able to spend every day with you, dude. Sometimes the days we get to have just aren’t enough.”

Dan kissed 90s Kid on the cheek before they started walking once more. “It’s getting chilly out here, Kid. We should probably be getting back.”

“That’s cool, Dan. I wanna be able to warm up with you and, like, think of more things we want our house to have and stuff.”

Dan smiled and gave one last backwards look to the street filled with empty homes. 

He had never been given much security in his life, in fact he’d hardly ever thought about such a foreign concept during his nights of reckless partying and drug abuse, but now things were different. He had given up chasing after the latest distraction and escaping into a world of fantasy because now his cravings were drawing him toward the world of stability, of reality. Dan wanted a safe place to call his own that he could share with 90s Kid. He wanted to fill out mortgage papers and pull leaves from the gutters; to whip up a batch of brownies for summer block parties and to decorate their house with enough strands of colorful lights that the neighbors called to complain during cold winter nights. Some may consider that kind of life to be boring, but it was the life Dan dreamed of, and one he would do almost anything to achieve. With 90s Kid by his side, Dan finally felt he had a life worth living.

“So, you wanna order a pizza and watch a movie tonight?” Dan asked after a few minutes of walking, when Dolly’s house finally came into view. 

“Dude, that sounds awesome! I totally wanna! But, um, Linkara like sorta called a meeting later tonight that we all have to attend,” 90s Kid explained with an apologetic look. “I’m sorry, Dan. Maybe if it’s not a long meeting I can come back and spend the night with you.”

Dan nodded, smiling a little at the news. “Don’t be sorry, sweetie. I understand. You have a lot of important work to do with Linkara, so this meeting should take precedence to everything else.”

“Thanks for understanding, man,” 90s Kid said, squeezing his hand again. “If I can’t come back tonight, I’ll definitely come see you tomorrow for sure.”

“Thanks, Kid.” Dan unlocked the front door and held it open for 90s Kid before looking up to the sky. Grey clouds had blocked out the sun and a light flurry was beginning to settle over the area. Dan opened his mouth, catching a few flakes on his tongue, before he too went inside.

\-----

Boffo hung up his coat after walking through the front door of the base on that same snowy afternoon and neatly placed his scarf there as well. Usually on days when the skies were grey and shedding snowflakes, he enjoyed making a cup of hot chocolate, curling up under a blanket, and watching something bright and warm, like _The Wizard of Oz_ , but today he had no time for such luxuries. Boffo was already behind on some expense reports Linkara had asked him to prepare, he had yet to perfect his newest tumbling routine, which he was hoping to debut for the children at the hospital next week, and he hadn’t practiced face painting in almost a month. 

Boffo hated falling so behind in his duties, even if they were self-imposed duties, so he moved all the furniture to the back of the living room, pulled his tumbling mats out of the closet, and started to work. 

_“I can master this routine if I keep working at it, I’m certain of it,”_ he mentally encouraged himself as he warmed up with a few somersaults, wiping a bit of sweat from his brow. _“My, it’s growing warm in here. I should ask everyone if they wouldn’t mind turning the air conditioning up when they get home.”_

Rubbing at his reddened cheeks to cool them down, since it did seem to be growing exceptionally warm at the moment, Boffo cleared his head of thoughts and focused only on balancing on his hands for a solid five minutes. He could do this...he could do this...if only the floor wasn’t wobbling underneath his fingers, for some unexplainable reason, he could certainly do this.

Boffo focused on breathing and trying to remain balanced upon his hands without wobbling. He hadn’t had difficulty with handstands in several years, was he losing his touch thanks to slacking off with his practice? He must stay upright. Boffo squeezed his eyes shut and felt a drop of sweat trickle from his brow. Finally, only two and a half minutes in, he collapsed onto the mats in a heap of tangled limbs, making a louder thumping sound than he’d intended to. 

Boffo simply lay there for a moment, unable to think well thanks to the sudden throbbing in his forehead, and couldn’t find it in himself to get back up just then. The mats were so soft and comfortable, and maybe a few moments of resting his eyes couldn’t hurt. He dozed like that for a minute before the back of his mind registered the sound of heavy work boots stomping up the stairs and a door being swung open.

“I swear, if one of you imbeciles decided to use bowling balls in the house again-Boffo? Boffo!”

Linksano’s irritation over the ruckus that had disturbed his science was instantly forgotten as he scurried over to the man lying on the mats, bending over him with worry. “Boffo? Boffo, my dear, are you alright? You didn’t fall, did you?”

 _What?_ Boffo blinked several times, trying to focus on the fuzzy image hovering over him. He squinted his eyes until the sweet yet concerned face of Linksano finally revealed itself to him. _Oscar. How lovely to see you._ Boffo managed a weak smile as he reached up to stroke the scientist’s face, though his arms seemed to weigh around a hundred pounds each, so he quickly let them fall back to the mat.

“Boffo, you look terribly red in the face.” Linksano pulled off one of his gloves and pressed the back of his hand to Boffo’s forehead. “Just as I feared, you’re burning up. You should not be tumbling around at a time like this.”

Boffo was still finding his arms too heavy to lift, so he tugged his horn from his pocket and gave it a few weak honks which translated to: _I’m feeling fine. I have much work to do. I can’t let everyone down._

Linksano frowned and gingerly scooped the clown into his arms. “I’m sorry, Boffo, but as your personal doctor, I am not letting you do one more second of work. You have a fever and what you need now is rest, so this is what will now happen: I am going to take you to our room, tuck you into bed, bring you a cold beverage, and watch over you until you drift off into what is hopefully a restorative slumber.” Without giving the weakened man a chance to respond, Linksano strode up the stairs and directly into their shared bedroom.

 _But Oscar, I need to practice. Please give me just a little more time._ Boffo feebly tried to honk, though the pounding in his cranium had worsened significantly, so he submitted without a struggle to being changed into his pajamas and tucked under the covers.

Linksano shook his head and reached for the scanner out of his medical bag, clicking his tongue in discontent at Boffo’s temperature. “Not with a hundred-and-two degree fever, you’re not. But don’t fret, dear. With my efforts, I’m sure you will be back in ship shape in no time at-”

Linksano’s words were abruptly cut off by Boffo’s barking cough, which startled him back a bit. Hearing any sort of sound from Boffo was rare, and his throat sounded so rough that Linksano’s brow furrowed with worry while Boffo laid back weakly against the pillows. “That did not sound well at all. Here, let me give you some medicine to soothe your throat and reduce your fever.”

He reached for a vial of pale blue liquid and Boffo drank it willingly, followed by some sips of cold water through a straw. _Don’t want to be weak..._ Boffo’s horn pitifully squeaked. _I want to be good enough…_

Linksano frowned. He didn’t like his normally content and confident boyfriend making such remarks. “That’s just the fever talking, dear,” he told him, placing a cold compress on the clown’s forehead, smiling as Boffo sighed in relief.

 _Thank you, Oscar..._ Boffo managed to honk before his eyelids closed. _Sorry for always...being so weak..._

“Boffo, hush now,” Linksano gently scolded as he curled his fingers around Boffo’s shoulder and squeezed lightly. “You not participating in battles with us does not give anyone on this team the ridiculous notion that you are weak. You know that, don’t you?”

Linksano looked down when Boffo didn’t respond, but he seemed to be peacefully sleeping, so he decided that he would sit in his reading chair and watch over him for a while. Or he would have done that, if only Linksano’s cell phone hadn’t started playing the _Bill Nye the Science Guy_ theme song at that very moment. “What?” Linksano snapped after hastily ducking into the closet so he could speak at a relatively loud whisper.

“It’s me, Linksano,” Linkara replied. “I want you and Boffo to meet me in the living room. We’re holding an important meeting in five minutes and I need you two there.”

“While I’m sure my genius will be sorely missed, I’m afraid I cannot attend this meeting,” Linksano replied. “Boffo has fallen ill with a fever and I don’t want to leave his side for the time being.”

“But-”

“There will be no buts, Linkara! Unless you plan on holding this meeting in our bedroom, I’m afraid you will have to reschedule it for another time. Good day!” With that, Linksano hung up, stepped out of the closet, and settled into his chair with a copy of Jane Eyre.

Unfortunately, Linksano’s escape into the world of Jane and Mr. Rochester would be short lived, as he was stunned to see the remaining members of the team start filing into their room. Boffo gave a weak swivel of his head as he blinked to see who had arrived, and Linksano slammed his book shut incredulously. “Are you serious right now, Linkara? Did I not just tell you that Boffo was ill?”

“Whoa, is Boffo-dude okay?” 90s Kid asked with a worried glance at the clown.

“He’s running a very high temperature, so please tread lightly, 90s Kid,” Linksano said, not blaming anyone but Linkara for this sudden loss of quiet and privacy. 

Linkara sighed and rolled his eyes. “Well, since you weren’t willing to have this conversation in the living room like I asked, we don’t really have another choice. I’ll try to keep this as brief as possible so Boffo can rest, but this really is an important meeting and I need everyone here, including him.”

Even in his weakened state, Boffo looked confused as to why he’d need to be present for a meeting, though he did attempt to smile at Ninja-Style Dancer, who came to stand beside the bed as well. *I told you that you would develop a cold if you stayed out in the snow for too long* he held up with a raised eyebrow, though Boffo could tell he was smiling. *I’m glad to see Doctor Linksano finally took matters into his own hands.* 

Boffo gave a weak chuckle that turned into another cough, and Linkara raised his hands to gain the attention of the room. “Okay, guys, I know we like to joke around here, but I really need you all to focus on this.”

“We’re all ears, Kid, so go ahead,” Harvey said. “We don’t wanna be late, so start explaining what this is all about so we can get back to our, uh, ’special movie night’.”

“Tactful,” Linkara snarked, though he couldn’t help smiling at the singer. “Anyway, now that we’re all together, I’m ready to tell you about an important discovery I’ve made.”

Linkara reached inside his jacket and pulled out a well-worn book of magic. “I know you are all aware of how the spells in this book are translated into English at a random point upon a timeline I haven’t even begun to fathom. Well, last night one spell I had never seen before finally became clear to me and after reading it, I’m pretty damn worried about what it means.”

The members of the team exchanged glances of concern. If Linkara was worried, there was a good chance they should all be worried as well. 

*What did the spell reveal to you, Linkara?* Ninja asked, already preparing himself for the worst. In response, Linkara flipped to a page near the back of the tome and started to read a most bizarre poem.

_“Words can Wound, Words can Heal_  
_Words we Speak, Words we Feel_  
_Words of Misery, Words of Wonder,_  
_Words of Magic, Words of Power_  
_Obey the Words and It’s Revealed,_  
_A Weapon For So Long Concealed_  
_A Power Feared By Mice and Men_  
_A Curse To Conquer Foe and Friend.”_

When he was done, the room fell silent as everyone pondered the poem and attempted to decipher its meaning. “So, if I have this right,” Harvey finally began, “you found a spell that can somehow summon some sort of powerful weapon.”

“Bingo,” Linkara said. 

*Is that all the information you have about this mysterious weapon?*

Linkara shook his head and sighed. “That’s the part where you all come in. According to the book, the weapon can’t just be summoned by reading the incantation listed on the bottom of this page. The summoner will also be teleported to a predetermined location and has to endure a number of trials to prove him or herself worthy of possessing it.”

*What kind of trials?* Ninja asked, looking even more prepared for the worst than before. 

“That’s just it; the book doesn’t say. These trials could be anything and might require things like intelligence, strength, courage, hell, even knowledge of _Power Rangers_ might be of some use.”

“You and I would totally do awesome at that kind of trial, dude!” 90s Kid chimed in. 

Linkara turned to him with a hard expression. “I bet we would, 90s Kid. That’s why I’m going to ask you all a very important question. This is going to be a dangerous and most likely very difficult to endure mission, but it needs to be accomplished. We have to get our hands on this weapon at all costs. That’s why I need to know: will you join me on this quest?”

Almost immediately, Ninja nodded and bowed slightly before holding up his card. *I shall assist you in completing whatever trials lay before you, Linkara. I have vowed to always fight alongside you in battle, and I will not allow our team to fail.*

90s Kid nodded, throwing up a rock-and-roll sign. “I’m totally in, dude! I’m gonna get right to work beefing up our guns so that they can totally annihilate the most hardcore trials eveeeer!” he yelled before being sternly shushed by Linksano and clapping his hands over his mouth in apology. Boffo gave the teen a weak smile to show he wasn’t upset, while Linksano sighed before giving a grudging nod of agreement.

“I suppose you would not have a successful mission without my scientific expertise, so very well. I’m in, Linkara.”

“You know I’m always with ya, Kid. We’re gonna get this magic doohickey and make sure nobody else can get their grubby little mitts on it.”

“I’m glad to know that I can count on you all,” Linkara said, giving a fond glance to every person in the room.

“But where does Boffo come in, Linkara?” Linksano asked, still curious as to why Linkara insisted he be present. 

Boffo looked to Linkara with confusion and the hero’s face turned serious once again. “There’s unfortunately going to be a major downside to this particular mission. I’ll go into full details later, but we are going to have to leave the base for an unknown amount of time.”

“What? Why?” 90s Kid asked anxiously, a sentiment shared by the team judging by the looks on their faces.

“Because the trials we need to face are going to take time to complete,” Linkara explained, “and in order to avoid detection, we won’t be able to just teleport in and out of this mystery location whenever we want. We’ll need to stay there until the mission is completed, no matter how long it takes. There’s also something else that we need to do to avoid detection, which is why I need to speak to you, Boffo.”

“Avoid detection?” Linksano asked in confusion. “From whom?”

“Other magic users who have access to this very same spell,” Linkara replied solemnly. “I hope you didn’t think I was the only one on this planet with a book like this. Or, hell, even this universe. I’m not even the strongest magic user I know, and that’s the problem. If one of the more powerful, more evil magic users completes these trials before us and acquires this weapon, there’s no telling what sorts of havoc he or she will cause with it. That’s why we need to avoid letting anyone know what we’re doing, and why we must complete the trials no matter how long they take. Therefore, Boffo and Pollo will be placed in charge of the base while we are gone, and...”

Linkara hesitated before a determined expression slid across his face. “And we will all have to swear that once the trials have started, we absolutely will not contact anyone who isn’t with us unless it is a truly dire emergency. That means that Linksano, you will not be able to contact Boffo at all during this time. Ninja, you will not be able to contact or give any information about this mission at all to Ted. And 90s Kid-”

“No.” Everyone turned to 90s Kid, who now had his arms crossed and his face clenched in a defiant manner. “I am not agreeing to this if it means I can’t talk to Dan. Just, like, no way, dude.”

*Wait, Linkara, are you absolutely positive that is necessary?* Ninja held up, looking quite unhappy as well. *I truly don’t think it’s a good idea to cut off our contact with the rest of the world. I have only just been spared from losing Ted and I don’t think it’s a good idea to leave him without my protection or even my presence for long* he admitted, not wanting to even imagine such a reality.

“How could you even think of asking such a thing at a time like this, Linkara? Boffo is ill, he can’t be left alone! I refuse to leave him unattended in such a weakened state!” Linksano protested, reaching for Boffo’s limp hand resting on the bed.

Boffo curled his fingers around Linksano’s as best he could and gave Linkara a pitiful glance. _Isn’t there any other way, Linkara?_ He honked weakly. _I don’t want to be here by myself._

Harvey came to stand close beside Linkara, as though to impress upon them all that Linkara was their leader and knew what he was doing, and also to try and help stem the rising tide of protest. “Hey, c’mon, cats. If this plan is good enough for him, then it’s good enough for me. The Kid’s never steered us wrong before, has he?”

He lifted his hand for quiet when 90s Kid and Linksano both opened their mouths and went on. “Look, this plan ain’t perfect, but what are we supposed to do? Risk the safety of all the cats and dames living on this blue marble because we might feel a little homesick?”

“This is different and you know it!” 90s Kid snapped, but Harvey shot him a pleading look and he shut up.

“Look, you guys,” Linkara began again, trying to keep the situation from growing any worse, “I really need you to understand what I’m saying here. There are powerful enemies all around us. You know this. You’ve fought with me. You’ve seen how much damage they can do on their own, but throw this new mystery weapon into the mix and who knows how bad things could get! We might not be able to save everyone if that happens! That’s why we have to get this item and contain it or destroy it before anyone else gets the chance. Isn’t it worth saying goodbye to the people you care for temporarily if it means saving them from total devastation and pain in the grand scheme of things?”

Even though he was being a bit hyperbolic, the team knew Linkara had a point, though they were loath to admit it. “Look, I’m not saying we leave right now,” Linkara continued, taking their silence as an allowance to keep talking. “I can give you all one day to say goodbye-”

“One day?!” Linksano and 90s Kid cried unhappily in unison. 

“We can’t risk losing any more time than that,” Linkara said sternly. “We will take tomorrow to gather supplies, weapons, and any items that we think might be of use in those trials. I want you all to also use that time to say goodbye to your loved ones before you meet up back in the living room at midnight. That’s when we leave.”

“But, but, th-that’s not enough time,” 90s Kid cried, looking panicked once again. “How can I explain this all to Dan before I have to leave tomorrow?”

“You won’t be explaining anything, 90s Kid,” Linkara told him calmly. “As I said before, secrecy is the highest priority, so you can only tell him that you’re leaving on a mission and that you don’t know when you’ll return.”

90s Kid’s expression turned to despair as he looked to Harvey, pleading with him now. “Harvey-dude, please, y-you have to understand. I can’t just leave Dan. He needs me! If he knows he can’t even talk to me when I’m gone, he’s gonna totally lose it...please, man, you have to let me-”

“Junior, come on,” Harvey softly interrupted. “Crockett’s not some fragile little rugrat. He’s a grown man. He can take care of himself for a little while. He’s strong, stronger than even you might think.”

90s Kid wasn’t listening; he was too busy shaking his head and trying to stop it from swimming. “You don’t get it. Nobody gets it. I can’t, I totally can’t-”

“You can and you will, 90s Kid.” Linkara’s eyes hardened as he stared seemingly through the teenager’s shades and directly into his soul. “Didn’t you just agree to help us? You are a valuable member of this team so we need to know we can depend on you when things get dangerous. We might need your skills and your weapon expertise during these trials, so I need you to focus only on the mission right now. You have to understand that the fate of the world is more important than your puppy-dog romance-”

“Don’t call it that!” 90s Kid snapped, his teeth bared in anger. “Don’t talk like me and Dan mean nothing! He means everything to me!”

“Does his life mean more than the lives of every other person on this planet?” Linkara asked hotly. 

Everyone winced at the question and even Harvey reached out to touch Linkara’s shoulder, a silent signal that he should stop, but it was too late. 

“Arghhhh! Damn it!” 90s Kid growled before he stormed out of the room and vanished from the apartment completely.

Harvey sighed heavily and pinched at the bridge of his nose. Boffo trembled lightly, causing Linksano to squeeze his hand in comfort. Linkara looked to the others once again, as though daring them to say something, and Ninja was the first to relent.

*The fate of the world is always more important, Linkara* he held up, though he still looked quite unhappy with this turn of events. *I shall be prepared for departure by midnight sharp tomorrow evening.* 

“Thank you, Ninja,” Linkara said gratefully, before turning to Boffo and Linksano. 

Linksano gave one last longing look to Boffo before sighing in defeat. “Very well, Linkara. I suppose we have no other choice. Please ask Pollo and Nimue to make sure the security systems are operating at peak performance.”

“I will, don’t worry,” Linkara replied, though nobody paid his last comment any mind. “I’m going to start packing and see if I can dig up any more information while I have the chance. I’ll let the rest of you go now to prepare for tomorrow and make the most of your remaining time here.”

Linkara exited the room with Harvey following suit, and Ninja disappeared with a puff of smoke that caused Boffo to cough again. He was too weak to argue right now and knew that Linksano would have to go, no matter how much he wished otherwise. Linksano crawled onto the bed beside Boffo and pulled him close, trying to offer them both some measure of comfort. But even as he was swept up in his own worries, his mind couldn’t help going to 90s Kid’s outburst of rarely seen anger. He hoped that the teenager could find some solace before their time was up.

\-----

90s Kid continued to furl and unfurl his fists as he walked down the street to Dan’s house. Normally he would have teleported right to his boyfriend’s doorway, but he was still so angry from his confrontation with Linkara that he needed to cool off before he scared Dan half to death. “Can’t believe him,” 90s Kid muttered, “He’s so totally bogus. ‘Course the world is important, but so is Dan. Dan’s super important, I friggin’ love him, but does Linkara care? He never cares about Dan. It’s like Dan is, like, nothing to him.”

90s Kid growled softly and kicked an empty soda bottle as that infuriating thought echoed through his mind. Linkara had never been Dan’s biggest fan before, but 90s Kid had never seen Linkara act so unfeeling when it came to Dan’s well-being. He didn’t understand how much Dan needed 90s Kid, how much it would pain him to be separated from the teen. “No, he doesn’t understand, cuz he’s never even tried to understand Dan. He just doesn’t care about him, or about our relationship, at all.” 90s Kid concluded.

The words left a bitter taste in his mouth and a burning sensation in his chest. Unable to keep away from his boyfriend any longer, 90s Kid stormed up the front walk and pounded on the front door. 

“I told you girls, I’ll have your cookie money as soon as my talking robot gets back from his espionage mission,” Dan replied as he swung open the door. His eyes widened when he saw 90s Kid and his lips quickly curled up into a smile. “Oh, it’s you, sweetie! What a pleasant surprise! What are you doing here so late?”

Dan’s smile quickly faded as he saw that 90s Kid was bright red and breathing hard, his whole body tense and rigid. “Sweetie, what’s wrong?” he asked in a worried tone, watching as 90s Kid pushed his way inside. “Kid? Talk to me, what’s going-ahh!”

Dan gasped as he felt 90s Kid’s arms wrap around him suddenly, crushing his body against his chest so tight that he lifted Dan slightly off his feet. 90s Kid squeezed his eyes shut and inhaled Dan’s scent, feeling himself grow slightly more calm but at the same time even more agitated. “Dan...my Dan...mine...”

Dan struggled a bit within 90s Kid’s grip but didn’t really mind it, reciprocating as best he could. “Y-yes, Kid…I’m all yours.”

“I need…I need to…to go up to your room, Dan.” Dan barely nodded his assent to that plan before he was swept up the stairs and into his bedroom.

90s Kid collapsed onto Dan’s bed with the other man still in his arms, loosening his grip slightly so Dan could breathe easier. “What...what’s going on, Kid?” Dan panted, looking up at the teen and feeling more confused, and somewhat worried, by the minute. “I-I’ve never seen you like this, sweetie.”

“I’m just so...so mad,” 90s Kid grunted, his fingers continuing to twitch in agitation even as his hands started to rove all over Dan’s body. “It’s just I...I...I totally hate Linkara sometimes!”

“S-so you, ahh! You h-had a fight, Kid?” Dan asked, trying to figure out what was going on, though that was becoming difficult now that 90s Kid’s hands were trying to become reacquainted with his skin. 90s Kid grunted in response and hugged Dan tightly, his lips eagerly covering the shorter man’s neck as he started to kiss and taste and nip at him. 

Dan shuddered, his eyes starting to roll back into his head, but he bit the inside of his cheek and tried to keep in control for as long as he could. “I-I’m sorry, sweetie...mmmm oh jeez! I-I know it’s awful when...ahhhahhh...when you fight with your friends.”

“That jerk is totally not my friend,” 90s Kid declared as he started to tug at Dan’s shirt. 

Dan knew things must have been bad to provoke this kind of reaction in Kid, so he tried again to concentrate. “A-are you sure you don’t wanna talk about it-oooh! Ohhh Kid...”

“Not tonight.” 90s Kid pulled back and slid his shades off so Dan could see the pleading in his eyes. “I’ll tell you everything, Dan, but please, not tonight. Tonight I just wanna be with you and show you how much I love you. Okay?”

Dan stroked 90s Kid’s cheek and nodded, giving up the fight for now. “Okay, sweetie.” He would always give in to 90s Kid’s requests, content with the knowledge that things would be explained another day.

90s Kid didn’t need any further confirmation and crushed his and Dan’s lips together again, reaching down and stripping off Dan’s jeans and underwear in one swift motion. He threw the bundle across the room so harshly that some of Dan’s Happy Meal Toys toppled over, but Dan couldn’t find it in himself to protest and 90s Kid didn’t care. 

“A-ahhh!” Dan cried out as 90s Kid suddenly ground their bare bodies together. He knew that 90s Kid was going to need him, and it was going to be a pretty bumpy ride, like it had been on his birthday. He would endure it, though, he would endure anything to help 90s Kid. 

He started to turn over onto his stomach but 90s Kid whispered “No,” and slid his and Dan’s fingers together, kissing him deeply on the lips. “Don’t worry, Dan. I’m gonna take care of you, man.”

Dan gazed into 90s Kid’s clear blue eyes and realized that he meant every word. “I know, Kid,” he whispered back, giving himself over to 90s Kid completely. “I trust you.”

Afterwards, Dan blissfully trembled in 90s Kid’s arms, various parts of his body warm and red and wet, but tingling wildly with pleasure. Thinking back on what they had just done, Dan had been very surprised to feel 90s Kid giving him gentle preparation in spite of his fever heat, and even when the teen entered him, desperate for relief, he had made sure to go slow and ask Dan if he was enjoying what was happening. The tenderness had nearly brought tears to Dan’s eyes, and it had been one of the most incredible experiences he had ever felt. 

“Kid...oh, Kid...I love you...so much...”

90s Kid rolled back onto Dan’s mattress, exhausted but very satisfied, and feeling much better than he had earlier that evening. He wiped a bit of sweat from his eyes before smiling over at Dan and pulling him closer, the warmth of their bodies slowly helping them fall into a restful slumber. “I...I love you too, Dan,” 90s Kid murmured, nuzzling the older man’s tender neck as he struggled to stay awake. “I love you...so much...I always will...my Dan...”

Outside the window, a soft flurry of fresh snowflakes settled gently upon the house, coating it in pure white.


	2. Chapter 2

Ninja sat cross-legged with his hands resting on his knees as he meditated early the next morning. Or more like he attempted to meditate, since his peaceful thoughts continued to be interrupted by images that were anything but peaceful. Such as Ted lying in the snow, a sharp kunai sticking from his body.

Or Ted lying deathly still in Doctor Linksano’s lab as he struggled to stay alive.

Or Ted lying in his dress robes inside a varnished pine box…

 _“No! That will not happen; I refuse to let that happen!”_ Ninja’s body tensed, his hands clenching into fists, and he swallowed heavily as he forced his mind clear of all images. _“Ted will be fine. He will be safer here than if he were with me on this mission. He has become stronger each day thanks to my training, and without my presence he will be less likely to do rash, reckless things like diving in front of poisoned weapons to protect me.”_

Ninja started to calm down again as he continued to repeat these words over and over again in his mind.

_“Ted is strong. Ted is safe here. I will have Pollo and Boffo to check on him in my absence. They will all be safe.”_

Ninja’s fingers unfurled and he took in a few deep breaths as he attempted to focus his mind on other matters.

_“I can’t continue to worry about Ted any longer. The mission is almost at hand. I must shut off my fears and emotions so that I can concentrate solely on what I need to do. That is the way I was raised, the way of the ninja. I must honor my vows to my family…I must shut off everything but the mission…”_

“Greetings, Ninja!”

Ninja leapt a foot into the air when he felt a pair of hands suddenly squeeze his shoulders. He spun around and pinned his assailant to the wall, before realizing that it had only been Ted, who was now staring back at him in flushed surprise. “N-Ninja, I’d be happy to try for round four, b-but is it alright if we have breakfast first? I’m kinda hungry thanks to last night.”

*Damn it, Ted! How many times have I told you not to sneak up on me when I’m meditating!* Ninja scolded as he released the other man from his grip.

Ted’s expression fell and he clasped his hands together in apology. “I’m sorry, Ninja. I didn’t mean to sneak up on you. I-I was just feeling so happy thanks to our vigorous romantic activities last night that I wanted to thank you,” he admitted with a blush.

Ninja sighed before reaching out to touch Ted’s arm softly. *It’s alright. I’m sorry for overreacting. Let’s have breakfast.*

“That sounds wonderful!”

While Ted skipped into the dining room to wait, Ninja set to work preparing their meals. He soon carried to Ted plates laden high with pancakes and eggs, as well as a cup of coffee and one of green tea for himself. Ninja dug in the moment he sat down, since he would need to eat heartily if his plan to train for the few hours he had until midnight was to come to fruition. Ted, on the other hand, took his sweet time nibbling at the food, since he was spending the majority of his time staring at Ninja with a lovesick gaze. 

“I hoped you slept well last night, Ninja, because I certainly did! You wore me out so thoroughly that I found myself sleeping like the proverbial babe.” 

*I’m glad to hear that* Ninja said before taking a sip of tea. *I also slept well, thanks.* 

“So, do you have any plans for today?” Ted asked after finishing one pancake to Ninja’s three. “I was hoping that we might continue our training together, if you weren’t too busy of course. I know that it’s much too cold to spend time in the park, but the martial arts studio I work for is closed today, so we could sneak inside for a private workout,” he said with a giddy smile. 

*I must decline your invitation* Ninja answered, trying not to notice how crestfallen Ted seemed by the response. *Linkara has asked us all to accompany him on a mission and I must spend all of today preparing for it. I will be practicing highly advanced skills, none of which you are ready to attempt, so it would be best if I trained on my own today.* 

“I understand,” Ted said, trying to perk himself back up a little. “What kind of mission is it this time, Ninja?” 

*All information is classified, Ted* Ninja responded before dabbing a bit of syrup from the corner of his mouth. *I can only reveal to you that I will depart at midnight tonight, and that I will not be able to contact you at all until I return.*

Ted stared at him, letting the forkful of egg that was halfway to his lips fall back to his plate. “It’s that serious?” he asked, unsure if he understood. “When do you believe you’ll be back? Tomorrow? The next day?” 

*That is also classified, but I would not expect us back anytime soon* Ninja held up before drinking more of his tea. 

Ted’s brow furrowed in worry and confusion, and he felt his previous appetite vanish. However, when Ninja gave him a sharp glance, he picked up his fork and forced another bite down, trying to think of what to say. 

“Well, you won’t need to worry while you’re away. I can assure you I’ll keep up with my training so I can suitably impress you upon your return,” he finally said, trying to put a smile back on again and keep his optimism up. “In fact, by the time you get back, I might be ready to take on the Plaid Ninjas all on my own!”

Ninja’s hand tightened around his cup of tea and he closed his eyes, forcing away images of Ted being beaten by an entire ninja clan. _“It will not happen. Ted is not so foolish as to challenge them alone. Ted will be fine. Everything will be fine. You must focus on the mission, only the mission…”_

“Ninja?” Ted glanced at him with even more worry. Ninja took in even more breaths before finally opening his eyes once again.

*I’m fine. Do not worry about me. I must finish eating and depart soon.*

Ninja knew the longer he stayed around Ted, the harder it would be to leave him. As much as it pained them both, Ninja knew he had to cut off contact with Ted as soon as possible. It was better this way, or at least that’s what Ninja kept telling himself as he finished the last of his breakfast and stood to carry his dishes into the kitchen.

“Oh,” came Ted’s sad reply. He glanced down at his half-eaten meal before standing up and carrying it into the kitchen as well. “...I’m really going to miss you, Ninja.”

*I’m sure you will, Ted* Ninja’s card read as he washed his plate and put it away. *But I’m sure you’ll be able to train and care for yourself just fine without my supervision.* 

“That’s not why I’ll miss you,” Ted murmured softly. Ninja felt as if an arrow had just pierced his chest, but he forced the pain away and instead focused his attention on the plate in Ted’s hand. 

*This is the first time I’ve seen you not finish everything and ask for seconds, Ted. I hope you don’t make a habit out of this, I hate to see food being wasted.* Ninja needed to focus on the meaningless or else unwanted emotions would overwhelm him. He could not afford that right now.

“I’m sorry, Ninja. I’ll put this in the fridge and eat it later. I won’t waste food, I promise.”

Ninja hated seeing the depressed look on Ted’s face as he covered the plate in plastic wrap so he forced himself to stare only at the soap bubbles in the sink as he worked. Soon everything was clean and Ninja hurried into Ted’s bedroom to pick up the remainder of his things. He had to leave now, or else he might not ever want to leave this place again.

Once he was ready to depart, Ninja stepped back into the living room only to find Ted leaning against the door, his head bowed low. Ninja approached him and put on his most confident expression.

*There is no need for you to worry about me, Ted. I am a highly skilled fighter and strategist. I will be fine no matter what kind of danger I face. I had hoped that you had more faith in my skills than this.* 

“Of course I have faith in you...but I’m still worried,” Ted said softly. “And I’m still really going to miss you.” He raised an arm, rubbing one red sleeve against his eyes. “I wish you didn’t have to go…or I wish I could come with you…” 

*Ted, stop. Don’t say things like that* Ninja gently commanded, pulling Ted’s arm from his face so he could see his cards. *I made a vow to my family to make up for the all sins I have committed, so I am grateful for the opportunity to help Linkara protect this world. I don’t want you to blame him for my decision to go.* Ted nodded, understanding even if he didn’t want to, and Ninja continued. *I also don’t want you to want to come with me. This is going to be a dangerous mission and I would only be distracted having you at my side, Ted. A ninja is taught from early on that emotions like love are weaknesses which must be forgotten during times of battle, so having you with me would only weaken me when I need to be strong. It is better for everyone if you remain here where it is safe and I don’t have to worry about you, so please, Ted…* Ninja’s card wobbled as he struggled to hold it together. *Please be strong for me and please help me to be strong.*

Ted rubbed at his eyes again before nodding. “I will, Ninja. I will be strong while you are gone and make you so proud of me when you come back. I promise.” Ninja managed to let one small smile slip out. Ted already made him proud simply for trying his best every day. “B-before you go,” Ted continued, looking hesitantly to the dancer, “c-can I just…hug you one more time?”

Ninja lowered his cards and opened his arms, allowing Ted to jump at him and squeeze with all his might. “I love you,” Ted murmured, burying his face in Ninja’s shoulder. “I really love you so much, Ninja.”

*I love you as well* Ninja traced on Ted’s back. The two stood there for a moment, embracing each other silently, before Ninja had to step backwards. *I must be going now. I will see you again, Ted. Do not waste any energy worrying about me, for I will be fine. I am strong just as I know you are. So for now, this is goodbye.* 

With that, Ninja vanished in a puff of smoke and left Ted still blinking back tears, but vowing that he would follow Ninja’s orders to be strong. He wiped his eyes, brushed off his robes, and went to collect his bokken so that he could continue his training alone.

\-----

The morning sun shone through the windows as Boffo lay propped up against pillows for the first time in hours. Linksano’s medicine seemed to have done its job, and now his temperature was almost back to normal. Boffo still felt a bit fatigued, but it was nothing another day of rest couldn’t fix, and now he was managing to sip tea and eat from the breakfast tray settled across his lap. While he ate, Linksano was busy packing various scientific gadgets and other items that Boffo couldn’t recognize, but didn’t ask any questions about. 

_Thank you for helping me feel better, Oscar._ Boffo signed to him as he wiped his mouth. _I think I’ll be back to normal in no time._

Linksano smiled, taking the tray and placing it on the dresser. “I’m glad to hear that, dear. Please at least give yourself another day in bed before you go back to your work, though.” 

Boffo hesitated for the slightest moment before nodding. _I will, Oscar._

Linksano approached him, taking off his glove before he stroked Boffo’s rosy cheek. “I mean it, Boffo. I don’t want you to risk aggravating your symptoms. If it were up to me, I wouldn’t want you starting work again for another few days at least, but I know you go stir-crazy from resting too long. Promise me you will not push yourself too hard in my absence.” 

Boffo leaned into the touch, nuzzling his fingers. _I promise._

Linksano bent to kiss his forehead before walking back to the closet and pulling out his gray wool coat. “It’s been quite a while since I’ve worn this,” he said, taking off his tan overcoat and slipping the other one onto his shoulders. At Boffo’s questioning look, he explained. “I just cherish this coat so much, Boffo, I don’t want anything to happen to it. Not that I feel something will happen!” he said hastily. “I just mean this to be a precautionary measure.”

 _Of course, Oscar. I know you always take the necessary precautions whenever you are about to enter a battle._ Boffo glanced again at the coat he had given Linksano what seemed like a lifetime ago before he sighed softly and leaned back against his pillows. _I...I wish I could come with you, Oscar._

Linksano’s eyes widened in surprise. “You do? Oh Boffo...” Linksano stopped his packing for a moment and sat down on the edge of the bed beside the clown, slowly entwining their fingers together. “As much as I am going to miss you, I would never want you to come with me on a mission like this. You already push yourself to your breaking point just by going about your everyday activities. I wouldn’t even want to imagine how hard you would push if you were in a dangerous situation where rest or food were not easily available to you. You would make yourself even sicker than you did yesterday, and I would make myself sick with worry over you.” 

Boffo squeezed Linksano’s fingers and nodded slowly. _I understand why you feel that way, Oscar. I’m sorry for wearing myself out like I did._

Linksano’s expression softened as he leaned in to lightly kiss Boffo’s lips this time. “I am sorry as well for scolding you like this. I don’t want our last day together before I leave to be fraught with lectures and regrets.” 

Boffo smiled and leaned in to kiss Linksano this time. _It’s alright. I know that you worry about me, just as I worry about you. I promise I will take care of myself while I am gone, Oscar. I will sleep when I feel tired and I will stop pushing myself to do so much in such a small amount of time._

“You don’t know how relieved I am to hear that,” Linksano replied, gently wrapping his arms around Boffo to embrace him.

Boffo sighed deeply as he held Linksano as tight as he could. He felt so warm and comforting; Linksano’s arms were his home. He was so deeply in love with him that the thought of being without him for one day tore at his heart. He buried his face into Linksano’s shoulder. “Boffo?”

 _I’m going to miss you so much._ Boffo signed against his back. _I don’t know how I can be brave about it._

“You must be brave,” Linksano said, and there was soft urgency in his voice. “You must. For how else can I stand it?” Linksano pulled back and he tenderly swept Boffo’s hair out of his face. “Oh, Boffo, you are so fine and strong and good. Not just your sweet face, my dear, but all of you. All of your body and your mind and your soul.” 

Boffo’s smile brightened in spite of the tears forming in his eyes. Linksano always spoke such beautiful words to him. _Oscar._ Boffo leaned in to kiss him again, more deeply this time, and Linksano found himself responding quickly. As Boffo began to pull Linksano back onto the bed with him, Linksano pulled away. 

“Boffo, you are still weak. I don’t know if we should begin such things while you are still in recovery.” 

Boffo shot him a pleading gaze. _Please, Oscar? I’m well enough, I promise, and we can be gentle. I just need to be with you, Oscar. One more time before you go._

Linksano stroked his cheek once again. “Very well, my dear. But at the first sign of fatigue, we stop. Agreed?” 

Boffo nodded, watching Linksano undress and letting the scientist take his welcome place atop him. _One more thing._ Boffo signed against his chest softly, his fingers tenderly tracing the faded scars. _Tell me how much you love me, and don’t stop. Because I’m going to miss hearing your voice the most._

Linksano smiled and bent to kiss him. “My pleasure, dear.”

\-----

When morning arrived, 90s Kid awoke feeling restless. As pleasant as the previous night had been, it wasn’t enough to comfort his troubled heart. He still faced the undesirable task of telling Dan why he had been fighting with Linkara and what was going to happen come midnight. 90s Kid let out a soft sigh, before glancing down at his sleeping boyfriend. Dan looked so cute when he was asleep, and 90s Kid loved how tightly the older man held to him as he dozed. Well, usually he did, but on this particular morning, 90s Kid had places to be, so he gently pried Dan’s arms from around his torso and slid out of bed. 

After getting dressed, 90s Kid headed outside and into town. First he stopped at the bakery, picking up two dozen donuts, and then he stopped in the small thrift store he’d made a habit of visiting every time he saw Dan. 90s Kid’s eyes lit up when he spotted the perfect item he’d been searching for, and he left the store with a small box in his pocket that bounced with every step he took.

After slowly coming out of a very pleasant sleep, more rest than Dan had gotten in quite some time, the 80s lover yawned and stretched in his bed luxuriously. He rolled over, reaching out to 90s Kid for snuggles, and was startled to see he wasn’t there. “Kid?” Dan figured that 90s Kid had been hungry, as he normally was after such a strenuous evening. He got up and walked to his bedroom mirror where he could admire the many red marks all over his body, especially along his neck. Dan so loved it when 90s Kid marked him, and last night the teen had felt like a ravenous animal claiming his territory. Not that Dan minded at all. He loved belonging to 90s Kid. He slid on his robe and was about to head to the bathroom to freshen up when 90s Kid re-entered the room. 

“You’re certainly an early bird this morning,” Dan said with a grin. “What were you up to?”

90s Kid grinned back. “I totally hope you’re hungry, cuz I got us some donuts!” He lifted up the box lid to reveal an assortment of glazed, chocolate-frosted, and powdered delights. 

Dan eagerly pecked 90s Kid on the lips in gratitude. “How kind of you, sweetie! What a wonderful breakfast.” He selected a donut and began licking the powder off of it, before sitting down on the bed to admire 90s Kid once more. “Somebody certainly was energetic last night,” Dan said coyly, his eyes dancing. “Which I couldn’t be happier about. I had an amazing time, sweetie.”

90s Kid couldn’t help blushing at being complimented in such a manner and he quickly shoved a sprinkled donut into his mouth to give him time to compose himself. ”You were...mmm, this is good…totally amazing too, Dan.”

“Oh, I had nothing on you, sweetie,” Dan insisted, licking a bit of powder from his lips now. ”I’m such a lucky guy to have a wonderful boyfriend like you, Kid. I don’t know how if I could sleep easy anymore without you.”

90s Kid lowered the arm that was about to snatch up a jelly-filled donut before he lowered his head as well. This was it. Midnight would arrive in no time and if 90s Kid wanted to spend as much time as he could with Dan on this day, he’d have to get the unpleasant part over with. “Listen, dude, I have to tell you something.” 90s Kid glanced over at him again before returning his gaze to the floor. “I was totally mad last night, and I know that you know that, but you don’t know why I was mad.” 

“It might have had something to do with Linkara,” Dan gently suggested, wanting to make 90s Kid feel more at ease so he could speak openly about the fight. 

90s Kid nodded. “Yeah. He told me yesterday that I...I have to go with him on a mission.” 

90s Kid paused, waiting for Dan’s upset response, but instead the older man looked at him in confusion. “Well, gee Kid, I sorta thought that you went on missions with him all the time.” 

“No, this is different,” 90s Kid said, the words now spilling out of him like water from a faucet. “I have to go on a totally secret, probably totally dangerous mission, and I can’t tell you anything else about it, and I can’t even talk to you when I’m gone cuz it could be dangerous, and I don’t even know how long I’ll be gone, and I have to leave tonight at midnight! I’m so sorry, Dan, I totally didn’t want this to happen, I swear!” 

90s Kid again braced himself for a negative reaction, but he was met only with calm. A strangely calm, unblinking Dan was now staring at him, his skin almost as white as the specks of sugar dotting his lips. “What...what did you just say, Kid? I-I think I must have misheard you.”

“You totally heard me right,” 90s Kid admitted with another not so soft sigh. “I know, it’s such a bogus thing to spring on you like this Dan, but I swear I only found out yesterday when Linkara asked me to go, and then we got in that stupid fight which made me so mad that I couldn’t tell you before. I’m so sorry, man; I really wish I didn’t have to just go like this-” 

“So don’t.” 

90s Kid stopped and stared at Dan in confusion. “What?”

“So don’t,” Dan repeated, his eyes suddenly locking on 90s Kid’s. “Don’t go.” 

Taken aback by this response, 90s Kid stumbled over his words. “I-you-I have to go, Dan. Y-you know that. If I don’t go something totally bad could happen.” 

“Right, something could happen,” Dan repeated. “Or, nothing at all could happen. Is it really that likely that the world would end if you missed out on one mission, Kid?” 

90s Kid tilted his head and continued staring at his boyfriend as if he’d started speaking a foreign language. “Dan, I don’t think you get it. Linkara, like, asked me himself to go with him.” 

“And I’m asking you to stay.” Dan said softly.

“Wha-that’s not fair,” 90s Kid replied, his whole body starting to grow tense. “Everyone is counting on me, Dan. Linkara is counting on me.” 

“And I guess if it’s Linkara counting on you, it means a whole lot more than if it’s me,” Dan cut in sharply, his words causing 90s Kid to wince as well as to straighten up in shocked anger. 

“Stop it, Dan. You know that’s not true.” 

“Then tell Linkara you have to be allowed to call me when you’re on the mission,” Dan challenged.

“Dude, I can’t just make demands like that,” 90s Kid said, growing more and more frustrated with this conversation. “Linkara wants us to be safe on this mission, so we have to follow his rules.” 

“I guess what Linkara wants, Linkara gets,” Dan continued, a tinge of bitterness in his voice, “no matter what the cost, because there’s no way you’ll ever say no to him.” 

“Dan, I told you to stop!” 90s Kid demanded, his voice much harsher than he’d ever made it in Dan’s presence before. “I don’t want to leave you, not ever, but if Linkara asks me to help him, to protect everyone, then I have to say yes. He’s done so much stuff for me, he’s like a brother to me – I can’t let him down, Dan.” 90s Kid’s tone was desperate now as he scrambled for ways to make Dan understand.

Instead of being at all sympathetic, Dan reached into his nightstand and pulled out his emergency cigarettes and a matchbook. After lighting up, he took a long drag before he turned to look out the window, as if he hadn’t just been having a conversation with someone. 90s Kid’s blood started to boil. 

“So what, you’re gonna ignore me now, Dan? You’re just gonna sit there and smoke and not say anything?” 

“Why should you care what I do?” Dan muttered in a petulant tone, and with this one question, 90s Kid finally snapped. 

“You know, maybe you’re right, Dan. Why should I care about you if you don’t even care about yourself? Is this what you’re gonna do when I’m gone? Are you gonna ignore everyone and smoke until you feel better? And then when you realize you don’t, and your cigarettes are gone, are you gonna drink until you feel better? And then when that doesn’t work, are you gonna get high?” 

Dan’s head whirled around, his eyes brimming with tears. “Is that what you really think I’d do, Kid? Is that how weak and pathetic you think I am?” 

90s Kid stared at him in horror, unable to believe he’d just said such cruel words. “Dan I...I’m sorry...I’m so...” 

“Get out.”

“Dan, please, I really didn’t-”

“Just leave, Kid!” Dan raged, the tears spilling out and sliding down his blotchy cheeks. 

His whole body shaking, 90s Kid pulled out his transporter and gripped to it for dear life as he teleported back into his bedroom at the base. Then he collapsed upon his bed, buried his face into his pillow, and started to sob.


	3. Chapter 3

Harvey knocked softly on 90s Kid’s door that afternoon, carrying a plate bearing a grilled cheese sandwich and a heart full of worry. 90s Kid had tried his best to muffle it with his pillow, but Harvey could hear 90s Kid’s weeping through the walls. It had distressed him so much that he found he couldn’t continue his shiny breeding for the day, instead deciding to make the teen some lunch and give him time to calm down. Harvey would try to make things as casual as possible, acting as though he knew nothing was amiss, and hopefully 90s Kid wouldn’t be too embarrassed to open up to him. 

“Junior?” he asked in a soft, comforting tone. “You haven’t been down for lunch yet, so I thought I’d make you something. Is it alright if I come in?”

There were a few brief moments of silence before 90s Kid said in a stuffy voice, “You can come in, Harvey.”

Harvey opened the door and shut it softly behind him, his chest tightening at the sight of 90s Kid slumped over and staring at the floor, looking as though he’d just lost everything he had in the world. He put the plate on the nightstand and sat down beside him. “You okay?” 90s Kid didn’t look up, but shook his head no. “You wanna talk to me about it? What’s wrong?”

“Everything!” 90s Kid cried as he suddenly threw his arms around Harvey and buried his face in his chest. Harvey made gentle shushing sounds as he wept, not caring that he was crying all over one of his favorite suits, only knowing that his boy was heartbroken and it was up to him to comfort him. He ran his hands up and down his back slowly, gently, murmuring reassuring things until 90s Kid finally started to settle down.

90s Kid pulled back and dried his eyes with Harvey’s handkerchief. “S-sorry, dude,” he murmured, but Harvey shook his head. 

“None of that. It’s alright, Junior,” he said with a comforting shoulder squeeze. “Now, do you feel okay telling me what happened?”

90s Kid sniffled, feeling himself getting choked up again. “I j-just got back from Dan’s.”

Harvey nodded, expecting that to be the reason. “He didn’t take it well?”

“No...h-he was really, really mad...but...but I’m totally the worst boyfriend in the world, ever! Harvey-dude, I’m such a terrible person!” 90s Kid poured out, burying his face in his hands.

“Now, I know that can’t be true,” Harvey said gently. “You love Crockett more than anything in the world and you’re always looking out for him. You could never be a lousy sweetheart to him.”

“No, you don’t get it,” 90s Kid sniffled, wiping his watery eyes until they grew bloodshot. “Dan was upset and I get that, and I get why he said all that junk he did. But I...I never should have said the junk I did back to him...I was so awful to him.”

Harvey frowned, not sure if he should push the teen too hard right now. “Look, Junior, we all say things we don’t mean when we get heated. I’m sure that deep down, Crockett knows it was your anger talking and not the real you.”

To Harvey’s surprise, 90s Kid lowered his head and started fidgeting. “That’s what makes me totally awful, Harvey,” he whispered. “I...I sort of did mean the things I said.”

As a fresh wave of tears overcame him, Harvey once again offered 90s Kid his handkerchief as well as several more soothing pats on the back. “Maybe it would help if you told me what exactly you said, Junior.” Harvey knew it wouldn’t be pleasant for 90s Kid, but if he had a clue as to what had happened, he might have some better advice. 

90s Kid sighed before nodding slowly. “Okay. After we argued about some other junk, I asked Dan why I should care about him cuz he’s probably gonna get high because I’m gone.”

“Ooh,” Harvey winced, not wanting to imagine how that had gone over. “Yeah, that’s bad, really bad. But Junior, I know you care about Crockett more than anyone, so how could anyone ever believe you’d meant that question?”

“It’s not that,” 90s Kid mumbled, twisting the soggy piece of cloth in his hands now. “It’s the part about Dan using drugs because I’m not there. I’m...I’m so scared that he’s gonna go back to them, Harvey. I thought it would help if I read up all this stuff about people who were addicted to the junk Dan used, but that only made me feel worse,” he admitted, looking tearfully to the singer. “I know how weak his body is, and how much weaker it can get if he doesn’t take care of himself. If I’m not there to make sure he eats and sleeps good, what if he...what if he feels so bad that he starts using it again? I-I can’t watch him go through that again, Harvey, I seriously can’t!”

“Oh, Junior,” Harvey murmured as 90s Kid let out some more sobs into his handkerchief. “I know you’re worried about that, and I ain’t gonna lie to you and say that you ain’t got reason to worry. But like I said before, Crockett’s a lot stronger than you think he is.” 90s Kid sniffled and looked to him again. “Remember when we went on our big trip together? You were worried about him then too, but you came home and he was healthy as a horse, because he knew he had to be strong for you. I know you won’t be able to check up on him every day like last time, but I think that cat loves you enough to look after himself for you until we come home.”

90s Kid sighed. “If he still loves me.”

Harvey frowned, squeezing 90s Kid’s shoulder. “Junior, I’d like to think I taught you better than that. Sometimes fights can be hard, especially between people who love each other, but does it mean you have to call it quits? Hell no! Even though he might be miffed at ya, I guarantee you that Crockett still loves you, and is gonna love you for a good long time.”

90s Kid wanted to be hopeful and he shot Harvey a pitiful look. “Y-you really think so?”

“I know so. I’ve seen the way he looks at you, Junior. It’s the same way I look at the Kid.” 90s Kid wasn’t too enamored with Linkara at the moment, but he still couldn’t help but smile. “But I do think that you need to go and make things right with him. You don’t wanna leave and have all this still hanging over your heads.”

“I know I do,” 90s Kid admitted, looking down to his hands again. “I just feel so, like, cruddy right now. I don’t want to see him like this.”

“Well then, there’s a few things you need to do to get ready,” Harvey replied, smiling lightly as he handed the grilled cheese to the teen. “First you need to eat this, because apologizing on an empty stomach ain’t gonna do you any good – believe me.” Harvey’s smile grew when he heard a weak chuckle from 90s Kid. “Second, you’re gonna wash up, because red eyes only look cute on Hoothoots.” Another chuckle and a bite of the grilled cheese made Harvey’s smile stretch widely across his face. “And third, you’re gonna think up the best way to let Crockett know just how much you love, and how much you’re gonna be missing him every day that you’re gone on this mission.”

“I already know how to do that, Harvey-dude.” 90s Kid glanced over at the jacket he’d thrown onto his desk and smiled at the lump he could still make out in his pocket. 

Harvey nodded and clapped 90s Kid on the arm. “Thatta boy. I would never doubt you when it comes to romance, because in that department you truly take after me.”

90s Kid couldn’t help beaming a little at these words, just as he also couldn’t help adding, “Yeah, but I totally think eating pizza on the couch is a better date than eating lobster and dancing.”

Harvey sighed and shook his head. “There’s still so much I have to teach you. Once we get back, I’m dragging you and the Kid out to every fancy place I know until you both admit to enjoying yourselves.”

“I look forward to you trying, man.” 90s Kid finished his sandwich then and stood up. “Thanks for the pep talk, Harvey-dude. And for the rad grub. I think I’m ready now to see Dan again.” 90s Kid glanced again at his jacket. “I hope that after I do, I’ll have two awesome things to look forward to when we get back.”

Harvey raised his eyebrow, wondering what 90s Kid could have in mind, but he figured he’d let 90s Kid keep it a secret for now. “Go get him, Junior.” He gave 90s Kid a playful punch to the arm before heading towards the door. 

“Hey, Harvey?” Harvey turned back around to look at 90s Kid, who was smiling. “Thanks for helping me feel better, Dad.”

Harvey flushed with happiness and he grinned again. “Anytime, son.”

\-----

90s Kid materialized outside of Dan’s house just as it was beginning to grow dark. His face was clean, his eyes were dry, and he was determined to apologize to Dan and make peace with him before his deadline that night. He knocked on the door, much more gently than he had the previous evening, and tried to smile as Dolly answered. “Hey, Dolly-dudette. Is, uh, is Dan here?”

“Hey, 90s Kid,” she said in a kinder tone than usual. Dan had been completely unlike his usual self that day and even she was worried. “Dan’s not here. I think he said he was going for a walk.”

90s Kid’s face fell and his stomach wavered, as he tried not to worry about Dan getting into trouble. If Dan had gone out for an escape because of what he’d said, 90s Kid would never forgive himself. “Oh. Do you know where he might have gone?”

“I don’t know, he didn’t say.”

90s Kid swallowed and nodded. “Okay, Dolly. Thanks anyway.” He turned around and walked down the steps, hearing the door close shut behind him.

As 90s Kid thought about where Dan might have gone, he found his legs carrying him in a familiar direction. A short while later, 90s Kid was strolling along the road of houses for sale that Dan had taken him to what seemed like an eternity ago. 90s Kid peered around carefully, hoping to catch a glimpse of the familiar white jacket he’d come to love, but luck didn’t seem to be with him that day. After almost an hour of searching, 90s Kid concluded that Dan was not here, so he set off walking once again without a clear idea of his destination. 

He strode through town, glancing at every building in search of one which would draw Dan’s attention. He knew there weren’t any NA meetings that night, so 90s Kid focused mainly on restaurants, thrift stores, and the occasional dark alley, which he would guiltily peer down before scurrying off toward a brighter location. Just as he was about to give up, his worry gnawing hungrily inside his chest, 90s Kid approached the pizzeria/arcade where he and Dan had shared their first date. A soft smile instantly came upon his face and 90s Kid moved toward the door, though he stopped sadly when he realized the place was closed. Suddenly, the very familiar sound of sniffling came from around the corner of the building, and 90s Kid charged straight toward the source. “Dan! Are you okay?”

Dan was standing there, leaning against the wall, tears streaming down his face. He had gone out for a walk without any idea of where he was going, and somehow it had led him right to this location. He looked up at the sound of his name and was startled to see 90s Kid there. 

The teen froze, unsure if Dan would say something or maybe even run away, but Dan’s eyes filled with even more tears as he charged right to him and wrapped his arms around him tightly. 

“90s Kid!” he cried, burying his face into his shoulder, as though he hadn’t seen his boyfriend in weeks. “I’m s-sorry; I’m s-so-”

“No, I’m the one who’s sorry,” 90s Kid shushed him instantly, holding Dan close as the tears came rushing back for him as well. “I totally didn’t mean to say those things, dude, please don’t be mad at me!”

“I’m n-not!” Dan sniffled, refusing to let go of him. “I s-shouldn’t have been so awful to you, Kid. I really am a giant failure!”

“Dude, no, don’t say that!”

“B-but,” Dan pulled back and wiped at his eyes with his sleeve. “I said all those terrible things to you! I tried to make you choose between Linkara and me! What kind of boyfriend does that? I know how important being a hero is and I tried to manipulate you, and even then you were only trying t-to look out for me. You were right to assume I’d fail without you…I’m useless without you, Kid.” Dan buried his face in 90s Kid’s shoulder again and 90s Kid held him tightly, his stomach rolling in waves of guilt. 

“Dude, I’m so sorry. It’s all my fault, I never should have said that about – but you have to know I don’t think that junk about you at all. You aren’t pathetic or a failure or whatever you believe. You’re Dan, my awesome boyfriend who I totally love a whole lot!”

“How can you say that when I acted so horrible to you?” Dan asked, his eyes red with tears and his nose runny. 

90s Kid pulled out the handkerchief Harvey had let him borrow and gently dabbed at Dan’s face while he smiled down at him. “I can say it cuz you were scared, Dan. People say all sorts of stuff when they’re scared, even angry stuff they don’t mean. That’s why I was saying stuff I’m not proud of either, cuz I’m scared to leave you too, man.”

Dan thought about this as 90s Kid tended to him, leaning into every touch. “You’re right. I am scared about having to be without you, Kid. I wish I was stronger; I don’t want to be this guy who is afraid of being alone or who lashes out at you when you worry. I guess that’s why I felt like running away from everything, just like the coward I am.”

Dan made a soft noise as 90s Kid embraced him and closed his eyes, soaking in the teen’s soothing words. “I’d never think you were a coward, Dan. As long as you run to a safe place like here, then it’s okay, because I will always find you.” Dan wrapped his arms tightly around 90s Kid, who nuzzled the top of his head softly. “I’m still totally sorry for all the terrible things I said to you earlier. I never want to hurt you, Dan.”

“I deserved it,” Dan mumbled against the teen’s chest, but 90s Kid shook his head. 

“No, you didn’t. You never deserve to be hurt and I never want to hurt you. I promise from now on, I’ll be more careful with what I say.”

“I promise that too, Kid.” Dan replied, leaning up on his tiptoes so that he could kiss his boyfriend. 

90s Kid’s smile only grew after that and he reached inside his pocket, fingers closing around a box. “I was never very good with words, Dan. I feel a lot of things, but I don’t know how to say what I feel sometimes, and sometimes I hurt people cuz I don’t think enough. But I don’t want to be like that forever. I wanna get better so I always know the right words to say to you, Dan. I wanna know what to say to make you smile when you’re sad, and to make you feel better when you’re scared, and what to say when you’re lonely and hungry and angry, and every other emotion there is. I wanna be able to tell you just how much I love you, Dan, how much I need you, how much it hurts when I’m away from you...” 90s Kid’s voice started to crack, and his eyes began to mist up, but there was no turning back now. 

90s Kid bent down on one knee and watched as Dan’s expression morphed into shock. “Kid, what...what are you...”

“Dan, I know it’s going to be hard when I’m gone on this mission. I’m gonna miss you so much and I know you will too, but you have to be strong for me, Dan. You have to be strong and you have to believe these words, and you have to remember them when you feel at your worst: I love you more than anyone in the world and I want to be with you more than anything. So Dan...” 90s Kid opened the box and displayed the silver ring with the garnet stone inside to the older man, “One day, after I come home to you, cuz I’m gonna come home once I know the world is safe for you again, will you marry me?”

Dan was so overwhelmed with emotions that for a few long moments, he couldn’t even think of what to say, as he could scarcely move or breathe. Tears flowed freely from his eyes, running down his cheeks and drenching his face, but he didn’t notice or care. He began trembling and his mouth felt so dry, but he forced himself to speak. “Yes,” he croaked out, nodding his head and sniffling. “Y-yes, of course I will! Oh, K-Kid, I...I c-can’t...I don’t know what to...I-I love you so much...”

Dan felt too choked up to utter another sound, but 90s Kid didn’t mind. He slid the ring onto Dan’s finger and pulled him back into his arms again. 

“I love you so much, Dan,” 90s Kid murmured in between kisses. He caught sight of his Tenderheart Bear watch and noted with dismay the time: 9:58. Only a few hours left, and he wanted to be sure to do them justice. He reached down and scooped Dan up into his arms. “I know I have to leave soon, but I want to spend every minute I have with you, Dan. Let’s go to your place, okay?”

Dan laid his head on 90s Kid’s shoulder and nodded, holding to the teen tightly as 90s Kid carried him home. “I’ll go anywhere, Kid, as long as it’s with you. I want to be with you forever…”

\-----

After an hour and forty-five minutes of gentle touches, caresses, and kisses under the covers, 90s Kid wrapped his arms around Dan for the final time that evening. He kissed Dan’s neck softly, trying to memorize how he tasted and smelt and felt against his lips, before he noticed Dan was staring down at his ring. The red gems set along the simple band seemed to almost sparkle in the moonlight. 

“This is so beautiful,” Dan whispered, stroking the ring gently with his finger. 

“I know it’s not super amazing,” 90s Kid admitted, “but I think it’s a cool ring for now. When I get back I’ll start, like, saving up for a ring that’s more awesome-”

“No, don’t,” Dan interrupted, closing his fingers around the ring protectively. “This ring is perfect, Kid. I love it.”

“Well, if that’s the only ring you want, then it’s totally yours,” 90s Kid agreed, pressing his lips to the older man’s once more. He glanced over at the time then and sighed. “I’d better get back home so I’m not late.” 90s Kid heard Dan let out a soft whimper and he hugged him tightly. “I’m sorry, Dan. You know if I could change things I would. I love you so much.”

“I know. I love you too. I’m sorry for being so weak,” Dan muttered, looking down at the sheets tangled around his body. 

“You’re not weak,” 90s Kid insisted, pulling Dan even closer. “I know you’re totally strong, dude.”

Dan smiled at him but didn’t press the issue further. ”I also know how important it is for you to work with Linkara and protect everyone. I’m sorry for trying to keep you all to myself.”

“I wanna keep you all to myself too, Dan,” 90s Kid murmured as he nuzzled Dan’s cheek. “Once I get home, I’m coming over here and not leaving for a week.”

Dan laughed softly. “I’m sure Dolly and ROB will be so happy to know that.”

The two kissed one last time before 90s Kid pulled away and climbed out of the bed. “So, um, I guess this is it for now,” he said, unable to mask the sadness in his voice as he pulled his clothes back on. 

Dan nodded and stared down at his ring, once again stroking it. “If it’s okay with you, Kid, I...maybe I should stay here. I don’t want to make leaving any harder for you,” he said softly, afraid if he said too much that he’d completely break down. Dan didn’t want that, he wanted to be strong, just like 90s Kid always believed him to be; for once he wanted that belief to not be held in vain. 

“I get it,” 90s Kid said, since he was close to breaking down as well. He pulled on his hat and walked over to Dan, taking his hands in his own and holding tightly to them. “I’ll be back as soon as I can,” 90s Kid whispered, tears he couldn’t contain leaking down his cheeks. “I love you, Dan. Please be strong and wait for me to come back to you, okay?”

“I love you too, Kid,” Dan replied, also crying now as he squeezed the teen’s fingers tightly. “Whenever I feel weak, I’ll look at my ring and remember those beautiful words you said to me...I’ll be strong, Kid, I promise. I’ll make you proud...I’ll make you...p-proud to be my husband...”

“I’ll always be proud to be that,” 90s Kid promised as he took out his teleporter. “Goodbye, Dan. I love you.”

“I love you!” Dan cried, holding onto 90s Kid’s hand until it vanished along with the rest of him. Then he brought his ring to his lips and kissed it before curling into a ball under his covers, weeping gently. “I love you, 90s Kid...please...please come back to me...”

\-----

Boffo sighed softly as he sat back up in bed, still in his pajamas. His sickness and fatigue was nearly gone, but he still felt that he lacked the energy to get up properly. For the first time in he couldn’t remember how long he didn’t feel like smiling, but nevertheless he managed to put one on when Ninja suddenly appeared in his bedroom. Ninja smiled back and held up a card. *It is good to see that you are recovering.* 

Boffo nodded, rubbing his throat a bit. _Linksano says that I should be just fine after today, so you won’t have any need to worry about me._

Ninja chuckled softly, sitting down on Boffo’s bed. *I was not planning to anyway. I know that you will be alright while we are away. Hopefully it should not take very long.* 

Boffo looked down slightly, trying to take those words to heart. _I know, Ninja. You’re all so brave and strong and smart, and I know it won’t take you very long to return here to me. I just care about you all so much that even one day away from you all seems like too long._

Ninja’s expression softened and he opened his arms to give Boffo a hug, something that he knew would comfort the clown. Boffo latched on gratefully and squeezed him. _I’ll miss you. Please be careful, Ninja._

Ninja nodded and pulled back. *Do you doubt my skills, Boffo? I promise you, I shall come back without a scratch on me.* 

Boffo managed a smile, amused as always by Ninja’s confidence. _Did you say goodbye to Ted?_

Ninja went stiff for a moment before nodding. *Yes. It wasn’t easy, but he understood what was necessary. Even though I have faith in him, Boffo…can I ask you to check on him now and then?*

 _Of course, Ninja._ Boffo instantly answered. _I would really enjoy getting to know him more._

Ninja smiled gratefully at Boffo before they turned their heads as the door opened, 90s Kid peeking his head inside. “Oh, um, am I interrupting you dudes?”

Ninja shook his head. *Not at all. I shall give you two a chance to say your goodbyes in peace. Farewell for now, Boffo.* He bowed to them both and disappeared just as quickly as he came.

 _Come in, 90s Kid._ Boffo honked, still holding onto his smile. _I’m really happy you came to see me before you left since you were the only one I hadn’t seen._

“I thought you, like, probably wanted to rest and junk,” 90s Kid told him. “Plus I, um, had some stuff to work out first.”

 _I figured._ Boffo said with a look of understanding. _I hope that you and Dan have parted in peace._

“Oh yeah, we did,” 90s Kid said, nodding in response. “Dan and I are cool. But, um, well…” 90s Kid paused and looked down at the floor shyly. “I was kinda hoping I could ask you a favor, Boffo.”

_What is it?_

“When I’m gone, can you…maybe go and see Dan sometimes?” he asked, his voice cracking slightly. “It’s just, he can get real lonely if he doesn’t have me or a friend around and, like, his roommates and neighbors are always going out to party and junk, and I-I don’t think it’s a good idea for him to be alone for too long. You don’t even have to visit him, just like call or email him if you have time. I know that’d make Dan happy cuz he really likes hanging with you, Boffo, you’re a really good friend to him and-”

 _90s Kid, it’s okay._ Boffo flashed him a reassuring grin. _I would be happy to visit Dan in your absence. I consider him a friend of mine so spending time with him would be very fun._

90s Kid’s face lit up. “For real, dude? Oh Boffo, that’s so totally radical of you! If you weren’t all infected and junk I would hug you so hard right now!”

Boffo giggled. _I’ll remember that you owe me a hug when you return._

“You’ll get an extreme hug then!” 90s Kid cried before he suddenly thrust out his fist and offered Boffo a slightly wrinkled piece of notebook paper. “Oh, and sometimes Dan goes out for a while, so like, here’s a list of places he might be. You can just, I dunno, check them or whatever…” 90s Kid watched Boffo scan the list and saw his eyebrows rise. “I-I mean, if it’s not too much trouble or anything!” he quickly added, realizing that perhaps this request required a bit more effort than he’d first thought.

 _No, it won’t be too much trouble at all._ Boffo reassured 90s Kid as he neatly folded the paper and tucked it into a drawer on his nightstand. _I will do my best for you._

90s Kid’s smile started to waver and Boffo feared he was on the verge of tearing up, when to his relief, the bedroom door opened again to reveal Linksano.

“Oh! Sorry to intrude, I didn’t realize anyone was in here.”

“It’s fine, dude.” 90s Kid quickly rubbed the back of his hand against his nose and headed for the door. “I was just saying bye to Boffo. We’re totally gonna miss you, dude,” he said as he turned his head to smile one last time for the clown.

_I will miss you too. Please come back safe and soon, 90s Kid._

Once he was gone, Linksano walked over and took a seat on the side of the bed. “It’s growing late now and I wanted to let you know that I will be leaving soon.”

 _I know, Oscar._ Boffo looked down sadly. _I will miss you so much._

“I will miss you too, Boffo,” Linksano said as he drew the other man into a warm hug. The two embraced each other in comfortable silence for a moment before Linksano pulled back, quickly wiping the tears from his eyes. “Promise me you’ll take care of yourself when I’m gone, Boffo,” he said, looking solemnly at his boyfriend. “Eliza has asked for some vacation time, so she won’t be around here very much, and I know that Pollo and Nimue aren’t always going to be available, so I’m worried about what might happen if you fall ill or become injured. That’s why I want to finish this mission as soon as I can so that I can return to your side, and your assurance that you will rest and relax and not overtax your body would be of great comfort to me.”

 _I promise I will, Oscar._ Boffo signed before placing one hand over his heart. _I will remain healthy and safe while you are gone. I swear it to you._

“Thank you,” Linksano said, closing his eyes to again hide the tears threatening to spill over. “I just...hate thinking about you being in pain or suffering, my dear...it’s one of my worst fears...”

Boffo hugged Linksano close again before kissing him softly but firmly, determined to prove his resolve. _Don’t worry, my sweet Oscar._ He replied, signing the words against Linksano’s back. _You won’t have to worry about me at all. I won’t do anything that you would find dangerous in any way. Please remember that instead of worrying about me. I want you to focus on finishing this mission as soon as possible so you can come back to me safely. I love you so much, my Oscar._

“I love you too, Boffo.” The two shared one last kiss before Linksano stood and headed for the door. He paused, his hand on the knob, and gave Boffo one last look before sliding his goggles into place. “Goodbye, my darling.”

 _Goodbye._ Boffo closed his eyes and listened to the sound of Linksano’s footsteps retreating down the stairs before he laid back and buried his face into his pillow, hoping sleep would come for him soon.

\-----

Linkara paced around, checking his watch testily every few minutes as he waited for the rest of his team to arrive in the living room. He and Harvey were already standing there ready to go; now he just needed to round up the last three. It was nearly midnight and Linkara did not want to be behind schedule. 

Ninja-Style Dancer was the first to appear, looking calm and dry-eyed, to Linkara’s relief. He had definitely been noticing the unpleasant atmosphere of the base that day, and he hoped that escaping it would cause them to be distracted from their own issues and put their focus more on their work. *I am ready to go, Linkara.* 

“Perfect. Now if Linksano and 90s Kid would get their butts in here, we could-”

“We’re here.” Linksano announced shortly as he and 90s Kid came walking up. Both of them looked rather downtrodden and miserable, but Linkara asked no questions. 

Harvey placed a hand on 90s Kid’s shoulder and squeezed for a moment, causing the teen to relax slightly. “Everybody got everything?” he asked softly. They all nodded. 

Linkara checked his silver pocket watch. “Okay, guys, it’s one minute to midnight. Everyone join hands and form a circle around the book.” Linkara laid his magical tome in the center of the living room before taking the hands of Harvey and Ninja. The others followed suit, all staring down at the book with expressions of curiosity and slight worry. 

Linkara closed his eyes and began to chant words in a language none of the others could recognize. The book started to emit a strange golden light, which quickly covered the entire room and its five inhabitants. The team began to feel warm and weightless, as if they were being transformed into beams of sunlight, and within seconds they were gone.


	4. Chapter 4

The five were transported into a shining white hallway that looked so clean and sterile it could have fit inside any medical facility, where they were dropped onto their bottoms, save Ninja who, like a cat, always landed on his feet. “Jeez Louise,” Harvey muttered as he rubbed at his sore backside, “I don’t know these magic using cats put up with these rough landings.”

“That’s the least that we put up with,” Linkara said, offering the singer a hand while Ninja did the same for the others. 

“Whoa,” 90s Kid said softly as he gazed down one seemingly endless end of the hallway before looking to peer down the other. “What is this place?”

“According to my book, it’s a magically created sub-universe,” Linkara replied as he flipped to the page in question.

“Am I to believe someone went to the lengths of creating an entirely magical world just to house one item?” Linksano asked in quiet disbelief.

*Perhaps it was the best way to protect the world* Ninja replied, his eyes constantly roving around as he searched for even the smallest hint of danger.

“So, Kid, what’s our next move?” Harvey turned to Linkara, who was still poring over his book. “There must be dozens if not hundreds of rooms along this hallway, so where do we go?”

“I’m not exactly sure,” Linkara admitted, a small frown forming on his face. “The only instruction the book gives for when we arrive is to ‘Obey the Words’.”

“But, like, there are no words,” 90s Kid pointed out. 

“There have to be words somewhere. Everyone spread out and look, but don’t go so far that you can’t see at least one of us!” Linkara instructed, before turning right toward the nearest door. Harvey followed along after him while 90s Kid and Ninja went left.

“Well, things have already started wonderfully,” Linksano muttered as he adjusted the settings on his goggles. Perhaps there were hidden words all around them but somehow hidden from the naked eye. Linksano was ready to scan the area with everything from thermal vision to X-ray vision if necessary, when a sudden glimmer of gold light appeared in the corner of his eye. He turned to discover that shining gold letters had suddenly appeared above the door directly in front of him, which spelled out one single word.

_INTRANT_

“Everyone!” Linksano shouted, waving his hands in the air. “Come back here! I’ve found a door requesting that we enter it!”

The others returned to Linksano’s side and stared at the shimmering letters in puzzlement.

“Okay, those totally weren’t there before,” 90s Kid said, while Ninja nodded in agreement.

“What do you think’s in there, Kid?” Harvey wondered.

Linkara adjusted his hat and pulled out his Magic Gun. “I don’t know, Harvey, but be prepared for anything. I’ll open it on three: one, two, three!”

Linkara took aim immediately with his weapon, as did the others, but there was no one to be found inside the room. Linkara cautiously poked his head inside before nodding to the team.

“It’s empty. Let’s check it out.”

They entered the room single file before spreading out to gaze around their new surroundings, trying to determine where they were. The room seemed to be some sort of laboratory, filled with cracked vials and flasks holding a variety of liquids, empty cages lining the walls that were starting to rust, broken microscopes, and a faded periodic table of the elements on the ceiling. The walls were chipped stone and the floor was steel, giving the entire area an atmosphere of unease.

“What is this place?” 90s Kid mumbled, stepping closer to Harvey and Ninja as he tried to suppress the shudder which wanted to run up his spine. 

“It is obviously a scientific facility which has fallen into disuse,” Linksano murmured, his interest piqued as he moved around the area, poking and prodding at the various items strewn about. 

“Eh, are you sure it’s a good idea to be touching the junk in here, doc?” Harvey asked. 

“He probably has the right idea,” Linkara said as he turned to the others. “I want all of you to look around for any clues that might tell us about our first trial, but be careful and don’t touch things recklessly.”

“Ooh, a spectrometer,” Linksano said, holding up a device with an impressed look.

Linkara glared at him. “As I was saying, don’t be reckless. We don’t know if there are any traps here, so keep a healthy dose of suspicion about you. It’s not like we’re just going to be presented with a clue that says, ‘This is for the first trial’ or anything.”

*Sorry to interrupt you, Linkara, but I found a scroll that is labeled ‘Trial One’* Ninja said, holding out a rolled up piece of parchment to their leader. 

Linkara stared back at the ninja before taking the scroll. “Shut up. It’s smart thinking to be suspicious of everything in this place,” he muttered as he opened it, the others gathering behind him to read over his shoulder. 

“Words Can Alter. Obey the Words: Solve the Riddle, Take the Solution, and Reveal the True Desires of Your Heart.”

The five looked at each other in confusion. “What the hell does that mean?” Harvey wondered, instinctively reaching for his cigarettes. 

“I’m totally not good at riddles,” 90s Kid admitted. 

*Where might this riddle be?* Ninja wondered. 

“Here, at the bottom of the scroll,” Linkara said, unrolling the rest of it. “Let’s see: Fe - N...huh?”

“Oh, give me that,” Linksano snapped, grabbing the scroll. He muttered as he read over the equations before smiling triumphantly. “Got it. We need to find a flask filled with violet liquid.”

The others stared blankly at Linkara, who shrugged. “He’s never been wrong about a science equation before. Start looking, but be careful.”

Everyone began searching through the dusty bottles of the room, coughing a little as they swept away the dirt and grime that was covering the labels, which all seemed to be printed in an indecipherable text. 

“Here it is, dudes! I found it!” 90s Kid said, holding up a large flask high into the air. 

“90s Kid, be careful with that! If you break that and cause this whole mission to fail from the start, you’re grounded!” Linkara yelled, hurrying over to grab the flask from him. 90s Kid growled and shook his head as Linkara started trying to read the wording engraved on the flask. “Okay, my runes are a little rusty, but I think this says...” He paused and cleared his throat. “Wanderer who is Lost and Found, Spiraling Swirls Curve Round and Round, Shielding Innocence that Was Lost, Freedom at an Awful Cost. Drink this Liquid and You’ll Break Free, Unleashing True Insanity.”

Linkara looked up as several pairs of eyes slowly traveled towards Linksano, who was looking rather pale. “It looks like this is talking about you,” Linkara said, reluctantly handing the scientist the flask.

Linksano stared down at the flask and gripped it within his gloved fist. “This does not sound good, Linkara,” he told them, a gravely serious expression on his face. “If what this poem is saying is correct, then it will most likely cause me to give into my madness. I struggle every day to keep it suppressed, but if it comes out, then…everyone here may suffer the consequences. I fear what I may do to you all.” Linksano swallowed and the others tried to look confident. 

“Don’t you worry, Doc. We know you’ll still be in there somewhere, and we know what to do if things get crazy.”

“Right, Linksano. We promise, even if we might have to hold you back, we won’t use any deadly force.”

“I suppose small comforts are all I can ask for now,” Linksano muttered, feeling extremely thankful that Boffo wasn’t there to witness whatever was about to happen. He looked at the flask intently, wondering how the strange liquid would feel sliding down his throat, before he lifted it. “Alright, be ready everyone,” he warned. 

Linkara nodded. “We will. You get ready too, Linksano, and don’t forget about what the scroll said.” He held up the parchment so Linksano could read the words again. 

The scientist was somewhat worried about what was meant by revealing the true desires of his heart, but he was too worried about what was going to happen to his mind to really think much about that. 

“Here I go. Your good health, gentlemen.” Linksano opened his mouth, tilted his hand, and drank the liquid down. 

It wasn’t cold or warm, and it had no taste, which was somewhat disappointing since Linksano had been hoping for an odd flavor to distract him from the fact that he was ingesting an unknown agent. Once he’d swallowed it all, he closed his eyes and waited for the inevitable pain which always wracked his body when a wave of madness came upon him. After several minutes of nothing happening, Linksano cracked an eye open and then the second. “Well, that was anti-climatic,” he muttered, looking up and intending to ask the others if there seemed to be anything different about him.

To Linksano’s surprise, he found the room suddenly empty. “Linkara?” he called, looking around in confusion. “90s Kid? Finevoice? Where did you go?” How could they have possibly disappeared in the minute that he hadn’t been looking at them? Linksano started walking through the run-down laboratory again, searching for anything that might help him find his companions, but the only difference in the room aside from their absence was the addition of a small, silver blade. It was sitting on a workbench at the front of the room and gleamed even though there was not any light shining on it. 

_“Why don’t you pick it up?”_ a strange, whispered voice said in the back of Linksano’s mind. Well, logically that made sense. This was supposed to be a trial, which meant Linksano might come across something dangerous or strong, so having a weapon on hand made perfect sense. _“Yes, perfect sense,”_ the voice repeated as Linksano picked up the blade to study. 

“What are you doing?” Linksano jumped a foot in the air at the sudden voice before he whirled around to find Linkara scowling at him. 

“Where the hell did you come from?” Linksano gasped, putting his free hand to his chest. “You almost gave me heart palpitations, Linkara. Where did you disappear to before? And where are the others?”

“You’re always so selfish, Linksano,” Linkara replied, his expression darkening. “No one can ever really trust you. We never know what you’re going to do, or who you’re going to hurt next.”

“Well, that’s very rude,” Linksano replied, trying not to sound as hurt as he felt. 

_“Yes, very rude,”_ the voice in the back of his head repeated. _“You should teach him some manners.”_

“Yes, some manners,” Linksano murmured before a glazed look came over his face. Before he even realized what he was doing, he found himself plunging the blade into Linkara’s chest before retracting it and watching as the other man fell to the ground. “Oh my,” Linksano muttered before a sharp giggle escaped his lips. “I guess I did give you a rather...sharp retort.”

More giggles slipped past him as Linksano found his mind growing fuzzy. _“This really is quite a comical situation,”_ the voice in the back of his head soothingly replied. _“Why not have a good laugh about it?”_

“Dude! What happened?” Linksano turned around again to watch as Harvey and 90s Kid rushed over to Linkara.

“Kid! Sweetheart, open your eyes!” Harvey shouted as he shook Linkara frantically to wake him up, wearing a face of abject terror. “Oh god, please no! Please not him!”

“Linkara, dude, wake up! Please wake up!” 90s Kid pleaded, looking as though he couldn’t comprehend what was happening. 

Linksano cackled. “Now you will never be able to exile me, Linkara! You will never be able to make good on your threat! I’ve always been onto your little game!”

“Linkara!” 90s Kid yelled again, becoming more and more panicked by the moment. 

_“He is quite loud. Very annoying,”_ The voice told him again. 

Linksano once more raised the blade, his mouth curved in a gruesome smile, a terrible smile. “Yes, I simply must shut him up. Shut them both up. They’re always squawking and singing and laughing, laughing at me! I was never really with them; I wasn’t a part of their family! There was only room for three, so I was one too many!” Linksano started to advance on 90s Kid and Harvey quickly shoved the teen behind him.

“Don’t you dare touch him! Linksano, stop! Ahhh!”

“Harvey!” 90s Kid screamed as the blade was thrust into the singer’s chest, then tears flowed from his eyes as Linksano grabbed his flannel so he could do the same to him. “Dude, please don’t hurt me! I’m sorry! We’re your friends-” But his words were cut off with a choked sound as the blade cut into him too. 

Linksano looked down at the pile of bodies and could only think to laugh. Yes, laugh uproariously. It was so silly to think of how simple it was, how easy it was to free himself from those fools, those traitors who tried to trick him with their lies. 

_“Behind you,”_ the voice whispered into his ear and Linksano spun around to see Ninja-Style Dancer. 

“It’s about time you showed up,” Linksano grinned, spinning the blade within his fingers. “Losing your touch at last, are you? You’ve always thought you were so much better than me. Better than everyone. The flawless dancer, the strongest fighter! Who is the strongest now?!” Linksano exclaimed, somehow finding the agility to dodge Ninja’s attempted blow and thrust the blade into his abdomen. The ninja’s eyes were filled with an expression of shame and astonishment, before he too collapsed. 

Then there was a shrill feminine scream which pierced something very deep inside the scientist and brought goosebumps to his flesh. “Ahhh! Oscar Schlumper! What do you think you’re doing?! What the hell is this?!”

Linksano’s smile grew even wider as he turned and finally saw her, drinking in the sight of her long golden hair, her bewitching green eyes, those soft, tender lips. “Spoonette…how long it’s been.” He giggled madly. “You were always too good for me. Always spurning my advances. Do I still repulse you, Spoonette?” Spoonette could only stare at him in shock, her eyes filled with disgust. 

_“She still despises you,”_ the voice purred. _“That’s not fair, is it?”_

“No, it’s not,” Linksano replied, moving towards her. Spoonette blinked to life at last and tried to run, but Linksano was too fast for her. He lifted his knife, ready to plunge it into her back, when a man jumped out in front of him, shielding her from harm with his own body. 

“Oscar!” Linksano froze as another voice struck his brain, a familiar voice, yet almost the voice of a stranger. “Oscar, please stop!” he begged, his eyes wide and filled with terror. 

“Wayne?” Linksano whispered as the man blinked into and then out of his view. The scientist’s eyes were so glazed over that he could barely tell if he was actually seeing him at all. 

The voice in his head wrapped itself around his consciousness. _“Now he shows up? After all the time you’ve spent searching for him, he has the nerve to show up now? He only came to save her, not for you. Never for you.”_

Linksano felt a white hot anger rise up within him. “Yes, why is that? Why did you hide yourself from me for so long? Why did you take her away from me? Why is she more important to you than I ever was? Why did you not come with me when I asked you? You chose to stay and protect her! Big brother, always the protector! Always said you’d look out for me! And where were you when all THIS happened?!”

Wayne’s eyes were tortured and full of fear, and he shook his head, raising his hands in shaky surrender. “Oscar, please, it w-wasn’t like that-”

“I’m not letting you get away from me again!” Linksano howled, reaching out and grabbing a fistful of the dark, wavy hair. Then the blade sliced along his throat, and Wayne let out a gurgle of what may have been apology or betrayal, before he too hit the floor. Spoonette screamed and collapsed, throwing herself across Wayne’s body as she started to sob. Linksano saw only a field of white for a moment, and when his vision cleared, she too was lying dead atop Wayne.

Linksano stood above them all, panting softly, his hands twitchy, his heart racing, his eyes blurry...blurry? Linksano lifted his free hand to his face and pressed it against his now damp cheeks. What was happening? Why was it so hard to see and...why was it getting so hard to breathe? 

“Hah...hah...” Linksano started to pant, as strange pangs of fear and disgust started to flash in and out of his mind. “Hah...hah...what...what? No, what...is this?” he gasped, his chest tightening as his lungs started to burn. 

_“They’ve hurt you,”_ the voice in the back of his mind said, _“They’ve hurt you.”_

“No,” Linksano choked out, gripping tightly to a half-destroyed cage to keep upright as his legs were about to give out. “They didn’t hurt me...I...I hurt them...why did I...hurt them?” A soft hand touched his shoulder and Linksano turned around at once, waving the blade wildly, only stopping when he saw the teary face of Boffo staring back at him.

 _Oscar._ He looked to the fallen bodies in horror. _Why did you do this?_

“Boffo, get away!” Linksano cried, as more flashes of emotion broke through the haze of his mind. He grabbed his right wrist with his left hand, trying to pull the knife down to his side. “Get away from me!”

_“They’ve hurt you,”_ the voice repeated. _“They’ve all hurt you…you must hurt them...you must hurt them…you must...”_

_Why, Oscar?_ Boffo signed again, the tears flowing down his cheeks now. _Is this what you want, Oscar? Is this what you truly desire?_

_“You must you must you must YOU MUST YOU MUST YOU MUST-”_

Suddenly Boffo’s hands were on his, guiding the knife closer towards Boffo’s chest. _Go ahead, Oscar…this is what you desire…_

“NO!” Linksano shrieked, the words painful to his ears. Snarling like a rabid dog, he yanked the blade free of Boffo’s hands and lifted it high into the air before stabbing it directly into his own heart. As the pain enveloped him, Linksano managed to smile before he collapsed onto the ground.

“Linksano...Linksano!” The scientist blinked his eyes several times, and soon they focused on four concerned faces standing over him. “Are you alright?”

Linksano blinked again before squeezing his eyes shut as he found that the light hurt them. He had a pounding headache and brought his hands up to squeeze his temples. His back also ached, and trying to shift into a more comfortable position is what caused him to realize that he was lying on the floor. 

“Wha...what?” Linksano opened his eyes to gaze at the four faces again, and then his eyes went wide, his mouth agape in terror. He screamed and the others backed away, looking to him in shock. “I’m so sorry!”

“Linksano, what-”

“I swear I never meant to! It wasn’t me! It wasn’t, I swear!”

“Doc, what the hell are you going on about?”

“Please don’t kill me!” Linksano shrieked, curling up into a ball and shielding himself. “You can send me away if you like, but please, I just want to live-”

“Linksano-dude, chill, man, okay? You didn’t do anything!”

Linksano froze, slowly turning his head to look up. “W...what did you say?”

*After you drank from the flask, you passed out on the floor nearly instantly. You have been like that for quite some time.* Ninja held up, also looking to Linksano with curiosity and confusion. 

Linksano sat up, seemingly in shock now after the initial bout of fear. “It...it was all in my head?” he whispered, child-like and afraid. “None of you...saw that?”

The others shook their head and Linkara looked to the scroll again. He opened it up to read the message, but he was stunned to see that the writing was beginning to vanish. Then the scroll lifted from his hands, suddenly surrounded by a brilliant beam of light, until it too disappeared. It wasn’t just the scroll, though; for the entire room was bathed in golden light so bright it caused each man to close their eyes. When they opened them again, the dingy laboratory was gone and they found themselves back inside the sterling white hallway. They all stood and stared at each other for a moment before Linkara spoke. 

“I suppose this means that Linksano passed the test of finding what his heart truly desired. Thank you, Linksano.”

He turned to smile at the scientist but Linksano whimpered in response. 90s Kid reached out to rest a concerned hand on his shoulder. “Hey, dude, it’s okay-”

“Don’t touch me!” Linksano cried, and 90s Kid backed away, raising his hands in surprise. Linksano took a breath and tried to calm himself. “I’m sorry, but I would prefer it if you kept your distance from me right now. All of you. At least for now...please.”

90s Kid nodded uneasily as Linksano got to his feet, and he trailed along at a safe distance behind the group as they started to walk.

“I’m not feeling too good about this, Kid,” Harvey muttered to Linkara near the front of the line. “I don’t know what happened to the doc, but it really did a number on him.”

Linkara glanced back at Linksano, who was still trailing the others by a good few feet and wringing his hands together. “I ran my tricorder over him when he passed out and there was nothing physically wrong with him.”

“Yeah, but mentally he seems to have been put through the ringer,” Harvey muttered, also glancing back at the scientist. “I wish we could ask him about what he saw when he was unconscious.”

“We’d better just leave him be for now,” Linkara advised. “We still don’t know how many other trials we have to get through and what they’ll require of us, so we can’t stop now. If Linksano still seems upset in a few hours, then we’ll discuss some more serious courses of action to take.”

“I guess that’s the best thing to do,” Harvey said with a sigh. 

At the back of the group, Linksano tried to make sense of the event he’d just been through. _“How could I have passed that trial?”_ he thought as the sickening images of his fallen friends and loved ones swirled through his mind. _“I killed all of them so easily. The only impetus was a feeling of annoyance or jealousy or anger, but that was all it took for me to end their lives. I seriously tried to kill them all, the people I care most about...so why did I pass? Why was saving Boffo enough?”_

Linksano’s chest tightened with fear. _“Is...is Boffo the only person I truly care about? Is he the only thing my heart desires, which means I can callously cast the others aside? But no, that makes no sense.”_

Linksano shook his head as he thought about this, not caring if the others saw and thought him odd. _“I do not desire to hurt the others, not when I have the madness under control and my mind is clear. I do care about them all, even if they are annoying and insufferable at times. I would never hurt them, not willingly. I want to remain with them, and with Boffo, for the rest of my life.”_

“Yes, yes, that is what my heart truly desires...” he muttered. “I will not let Linkara down.”

A sudden burst of tinkly, high-pitched laughter erupted behind Linksano, before a strangely cold breeze blew past him, causing his entire body to shudder. Linksano whirled around, ready to call for help if necessary, but found there was no one and nothing behind him but empty white hallway. He checked all the settings on his goggles just to be certain he wasn’t missing something hidden, but the area seemed to be clear.

Had he suffered one last burst of the trial’s cruelty? Linksano wasn’t sure, but as he hurried to catch up with the others, he felt confident about his desires. He would do whatever it took to prove his loyalty and friendship to the others. He would not let the madness control him again. 

\-----

Boffo came downstairs bright and early one morning, dressed in his full clowning garb, even though it was his day off from work. He had no hospital visits, no birthday parties, no street fairs or carnivals, not even any accounting paperwork to distract him. He looked eagerly to the kitchen, expecting to see Ninja there as he always was, cooking breakfast and making coffee, before sadly remembering that the dancer was nowhere to be found. His gaze slowly moved toward the couch, where he hoped to see 90s Kid giggling at the morning cartoons, but the TV was dark and silent. 

Boffo cocked his ear to the side of the room the basement door was on, wishing with all his heart to hear the banging of mallets and the whirring of drills, but then he remembered that the lab would be silent for quite some time to come. His gaze turned sad and a heavy feeling settled on his chest. 

Linksano was not home. None of his friends had been home for days. 

“Good morning, Boffo.”

Boffo’s face lit up as Pollo hovered into the room. _Good morning, Pollo! How are you today?_

“Aside from a lack of working arms, I can’t complain.” Boffo chuckled warmly. “How about you? You seem to be working hard at the hospital as always.”

 _I’m fine thanks. I even have a day off today, so I won’t be working at all! Say, why don’t we do something fun together?_ Boffo asked with an eager expression. _We could watch a movie together! I know you’ve been interested in seeing that documentary on Isaac Asimov, Pollo! Or we could play a game! I remember you being quite good at poker, and if we asked Nimue to join us, I’m sure we could have a real fierce battle going!_

“As fun as that sounds, Boffo, I’m going to have to decline,” Pollo said. “Burton has invited me over for the afternoon. He has the place to himself and we’d like to take advantage of that.”

 _Oh._ Boffo honked, feeling his good mood start to wither away. _Well, I hope you have a nice time. What about you, Nimue?_ Boffo looked over to one of her monitors. _Would you like to watch a movie?_

“This unit appreciates the offer, but is programmed to run system diagnostics for the rest of the day,” Nimue replied.

 _Oh. So I suppose it will just be me today._ Boffo sadly honked.

“I will activate the new security systems and will check in with you every hour to be certain you are safe,” Pollo promised. “If you need any assistance, call me immediately.”

Boffo nodded. _Thanks, Pollo. Have fun. You too, Nimue._

Once Pollo had departed and Nimue had shut herself off, Boffo sighed and pocketed his horn, feeling sad that he’d have no use for it that day. He started the coffee machine and reached for some cereal, deciding to make himself something quick before getting into his usual morning routine.

After a quiet breakfast in the kitchen that lasted much too long for Boffo’s comfort, he quickly washed and put away his dishes before heading into the living room and turning on the television. Boffo hated silence so tried to surround himself by some sort of noise whenever it was possible. It didn’t matter that the man on the TV was chattering away about stainless steel knives he would never purchase, since Boffo was grateful for his presence all the same. 

The clown sat down on the couch then and picked up his latest purchase, a book of magic tricks, intending to study up on some new surprises to show everyone when they came home. Boffo read for a while before pulling out a deck of cards and beginning work on the trick. As he practiced, he couldn’t help recalling the time he had shown Linksano a scientifically-themed card trick on their journey to a cabin one Christmas. Boffo’s heart fluttered as he remembered how much Linksano had enjoyed the trick, and his longing for the other man increased. 

_"Oh, I must not be so silly,"_ Boffo mentally scolded himself before forcing his mind back to the task at hand. If he spent all his time daydreaming, he would never get anything done, and he’d only miss Linksano more than he did now.

By the time Boffo had the trick mastered to his satisfaction, he realized that it was almost 1:30 in the afternoon. _"Have I really been practicing for that long?"_ Boffo wondered, slightly surprised by his ability to lose track of time. _"This is what Oscar is always worried about. I will not let him down though. I will stop right now and have lunch, since that is what’s good for me."_ Boffo followed through with his vow and soon found himself back at the kitchen table with a sandwich and a bowl of fruit. He was trying to eat in a healthier manner as well but it wasn’t easy. Eating by himself was not something Boffo enjoyed and it somehow made his food lose its flavor. Meals had never been dull before when everyone was there to enjoy them together, but when it was just him, everything was bland and boring.

After he’d finished and cleaned up again, Boffo returned to the living room feeling restless. It was so silent and lonesome in the huge, empty apartment. Boffo craved company and his eyebrows rose up when he suddenly remembered that Dan and Ted were here, and most likely experiencing what he was. Boffo grabbed his phone and sent a text to Ted and an email to Dan inviting them over right away. To his dismay, Ted replied back with an apology, since he had a class to teach that day, and dinner with his family that night, and Dan never responded at all.

Boffo sighed and tossed his phone onto the coffee table. He wanted to do something, but he knew he had to take it easy, so he forced himself to lie on the couch for a while. Unfortunately, his hopes of an afternoon nap were quickly squashed as he found himself staring at the ceiling for half an hour. 

_"Oh, I can’t take it anymore,"_ Boffo finally decided, standing up again. _"I have to do something. I have to find someone to speak with."_

His mind wandered back to his recently learned card trick before Boffo had a great idea. _"I’ll go to the civic center and hold a magic show for the children!"_ If he couldn’t perform at the hospital that day, it didn’t mean he couldn’t perform for anyone, so Boffo would just find his own audience. He ran upstairs to gather his supplies and was about to head out the door when he realized that there was about three feet of snow on the ground and, judging by the rate the snow was still falling, it looked as if there would be more.

Boffo stared forlornly outside the window at the grey skies, feeling as if nature had decided to take on the color of his mood that day. He had forgotten all about the winter storm that was supposed to plague the city for days at least. Boffo sighed deeply, set down his supplies, and trudged back up the stairs. He returned in a comfortable T-shirt and pajama pants, and without his nose and wig. After heading into the kitchen to make himself a cup of cocoa and picking out the comfiest blanket he could find, he curled up into a tight cocoon on the couch and stared at the TV, trying not to let himself cry. Linksano wouldn’t like it if he knew that he was just sitting here and crying over his absence.

Boffo wanted to be strong, but he was so lonely without the others, and they had been gone for what already felt like a long time. Boffo sighed again and pulled the blanket around him tighter. It couldn’t go on for much longer. None of their missions had ever lasted longer than a couple weeks. They had to be back soon, any day now. Maybe they’d be back once this infomercial was over. It could happen. Boffo kept watching and waiting, but no familiar faces appeared, leaving him only with the fake, polished smiles of those who had nothing to offer but tacky products and false promises.


	5. Chapter 5

After walking for an indeterminable amount of time without any further appearance of words to guide them, Ninja raised a hand for the team to stop.

*Do any of you smell that beautiful scent?*

The four men sniffed the air in confusion before Harvey’s eyes widened.

“Oh yeah, that’s real nice. What do you think that is?”

*I don’t know, but it’s coming from this direction.* Ninja hurried along the hallway, leading the group now, before he spotted a glimmer of gold writing above one of the doors.

_HAIRU_

*The sign says we should enter this room.* Linkara nodded and pulled out his weapon, as did the others.

“Okay, everyone, you know what to do: one, two, three!”

After flinging open the door and once again finding no one on the other side, the team cautiously entered the second room, having no idea of what to expect within.

“Holy moly.” The five stared breathlessly at their surroundings. Instead of a dingy laboratory, they now found themselves in a place of unearthly beauty, an outdoor setting which could not possibly exist anywhere on Earth. The sweet, luscious smell of fruits and flowers, which had originally caught Ninja’s attention, was even stronger here, and caused the team to suddenly feel hungry for the first time since arriving in this world. As an impossibly golden sun shone down upon them, a soft breeze carried rose petals of every color of the rainbow in front of their eyes. The rose petals eventually glided into a waterfall, where they mingled in the water as young fawns and ducklings splashed and drank, looking so adorable that the team could hardly tear their eyes away from them.

Once the five did get their fill of admiring baby animals, they managed to focus on the rest of the setting. A large temple of gold covered in unfamiliar markings stood far off in the distance, surrounded by grass that was as soft as silk but gleamed like emeralds, and the fields all around them were decorated with lush orchards bearing every type of fruit imaginable, and some that weren’t imaginable, and precious stones that played music when the wind touched them. Exotic birds flew past, speaking in reverent voices of ancient tongues, while wisps of silver danced across the azure sky. 

Finally, Harvey wet his lips and tried to speak. “Does the trial have something to do with leaving Heaven behind?”

Linkara shook his head to clear it as he tried to resist the urge to pluck some of the choice fruits from the tree. “I’m not sure. Can anyone see the scroll around here?” In response, a dazzling bird with jewel-like feather flew overhead, and with a note of the sweetest pitch, dropped the scroll into Linkara’s hands. They all huddled around as he unfurled it and read aloud.

“Words Can Reveal,” he read, as he’d done before. “Obey the Words: Realize the Truth, Do Not Act.” Everyone continued to remain silent, waiting for Linkara to continue, but instead he frowned, unfurled the scroll completely, turned it over, held it up to the sunlight, and finally lowered his arms to shrug. “That’s all it says.”

“I don’t get it,” Harvey murmured, scratching his head as he turned again to look around the paradise they were standing in. “Does that mean we’re not supposed to do anything?”

“I guess for the time being it does,” Linkara replied. “Why don’t we all just find somewhere to sit for now and see if the scroll changes in any way.” The others agreed and they all moved beneath a tall tree that shone bright purple thanks to the amethysts dotting its branches. 

While Linkara, Harvey, and Ninja placed the scroll flat on the ground so they could all watch it, 90s Kid’s gaze turned back to the lush world around them. The air smelled so sweet that the teen couldn’t help licking his lips, and the birds sang so beautifully that he couldn’t remember ever loving any other type of music more. Everything around him was so gorgeous and pure that 90s Kid was almost in awe of it all. He wanted to remember every detail so that he could describe this place to Dan and share some good stories about the mission once they were home; while Linksano’s trial had not exactly done the trick, this second trial might be different. 

After some time had passed with not a thing of interest happening, Ninja couldn’t help but notice that Linksano was still sitting a bit far from the group, so he scooted closer to the scientist. Linksano looked less pale and frightened than he had before, though he sat with his knees pulled up to his chin, as if he were trying to make himself smaller. 

Ninja very slowly raised a card in front of Linksano’s gaze, trying not to startle him. *How are you feeling?*

Linksano glanced at Ninja before looking back to the waterfall ahead of him. “I feel better here,” he admitted. “Everything is so peaceful and colorful here...this is a place Boffo would love.”

*I think so too* Ninja agreed, smiling as he imagined the wondrous expression Boffo would most certainly display if he came across a place like this.

Instead of smiling, though, Linksano’s expression grew guilty. “I…I sort of wish that…he were here with us.”

Ninja’s face hardened instantly.*This is no place for anyone we love to be. They would be in danger, and their presence would only weaken us. It’s better that we are alone. I thought you understood that.*

Linksano whimpered and pressed his face into his knees, clutching his legs more tightly. Ninja sighed, already kicking himself for showing such unnecessary harshness, and was ready to apologize when a strange noise captured his attention. 

*Does anyone else hear that?* Ninja suddenly held up on a card. Everyone turned to him curiously. 

“Hear what, Ninja?” Linkara asked. 

Ninja closed his eyes and listened for a moment before he turned his body one-hundred-and-eighty degrees and pointed straight ahead. *Right there! Look, something new has appeared! *

The others looked to where Ninja pointed, then tilted their heads in confusion when they saw nothing else except the paradise that they had stepped into. “Um, like, what are you talking about?” 90s Kid wondered. 

Ninja turned to them all incredulously. *Do you not see it? It’s right there!* He pointed again. His eyes could not be deceiving him; were his teammates going blind? 

Ninja stared intently at what had suddenly replaced paradise, a bustling city. Men, women, and children of all shapes and backgrounds were dancing and sparring and running joyfully about without a care in the world. Vendors of all kinds had appeared, clattering items to advertise their wares; street performers and sidewalk dancers also filled the streets, creating a loud smorgasbord of voices, every one raising higher and higher in order to be heard above the din. 

A warm feeling of nostalgia spread through Ninja’s veins and his heart swelled, for it reminded him of the olden days, back when he lived in his village and was permitted to enter town to gather supplies for his clan. It touched something deep within him, making him smile like he hadn’t in years. 

Was this his own personal Heaven, then? Could this be what the scroll had meant? Revealing to him what he desired to see most, but directing him not to partake of the familiar people, the meals, and the atmosphere of home? Ninja closed his eyes and breathed in a lungful of the sweet, refreshing air, but was stunned when he found his nostrils suddenly filled with the acrid stench of smoke.

To Ninja’s horror, the entire city seemed to catch fire before his eyes, buildings exploding into brilliant fireballs so hot that he could feel the lick of the flames from where he sat, while the innocent civilians ran through the streets screaming for help. 

*It’s burning!* Ninja cried as he leapt to his feet. 

The others watched him in surprise. “Ninja, what are you doing?” Linkara asked.

*I cannot just sit idly by while these poor people burn to death!* 

“But there are no people!” Linkara insisted. 

“Twinkle Toes, you really see something like that?” Harvey asked, squinting his eyes a bit as he stared at the lake in front of him, as if willing it to reveal some hidden scene. 

*Of course I do! How can you not see the devastation unfolding before our eyes?* Ninja winced as a flaming piece of a thatched roof collapsed upon a few citizens scrambling to escape and his eyes hardened with determination. *I will not allow anyone else to perish in my presence. I must help them!* 

“Ninja, stop.” Linkara reached up and caught his wrist, trying to tug the man back down to the grass. “We were given clear instructions not to act, so you have to sit back down.”

Ninja pulled his arm free and turned back toward the sight before him, noting that the smoke was growing thicker while the screams grew louder. 

“Help!” they called in voices young and old, male and female. “Please, anyone, help us!”

*I cannot consider myself an honorable man if I refuse to help those who ask for it. I must go.* Ninja brought his hands together, ready to make the necessary seals so he could vanish in a puff of smoke, but he never got the chance to. At that moment, 90s Kid lunged at the ninja, wrapping his arms around the man’s legs and tackling him to the ground.

Ninja let out a breath of pain, but this would not be enough to stop him and he quickly started to wriggle around, trying to kick the teenager who was stubbornly pinning his legs to the ground. *Let me go!* he demanded, the words on his card now written in red ink due to his anger. 

“Dude, you can’t move,” 90s Kid replied, grunting every time Ninja started to slip away before tightening his grip. “There’s nothing over there, so you have to stay still, okay?”

*I said let me go!* 

“Linkara, Harvey-dude, help me!” 90s Kid pleaded, and soon the two were pinning Ninja’s arms to the ground. 

“Help us! Ninja, please! Help us!” the voices continued to call. Ninja grit his teeth, the anger within him starting to rise almost as high as the flames overtaking the village. 

*Let me up at once! I don’t want to hurt you, but I will if you refuse to let me go!* 

“Ninja, stop this!” Linkara demanded, still struggling with the insistent man’s arm. “We are going to fail this trial!”

*Who cares about that?! I am going to fail as a human being!* Ninja closed his eyes and began to gather every ounce of spiritual energy he possessed. The others could feel how the fighter’s body was starting to grow stronger and they looked at each other worriedly. 

“Ninja, please,” Linkara begged. 

“You can’t do this,” Harvey warned.

“Ninja-dude, there’s nothing over there, I swear!”

Ninja couldn’t hear them, not over the dying screams of the innocent. 

“Help us! Please, Shinobu! Save us! You are the only one who can save us! You are so strong and so brave! Shinobu please! Protect us this time!” Ninja’s eyes started to glow and his body heated up, but before he could unleash the brunt of his power, the tip of a syringe was plunged into his neck. 

At once, Ninja fell limp, his body growing much too heavy for one man to carry himself, his spiritual energy dissipated. He blinked groggily and wondered if he would pass out before he managed to turn his head and stare in confusion at Linksano. 

“A muscle relaxant,” the scientist said, not needing to read the question. “It won’t knock you unconscious, but your limbs will feel like dead weight for some time.”

*What...have…you done?* Ninja managed to scrawl onto his card, his eyes full of astonishment and anger. *How...dare...you?*

“Because I know what’s happening,” Linksano said softly, placing a hand on Ninja’s back, not to hold him down, but to try and reach out to the man. “I know it’s hard to believe but I promise you, this is all in your head. The trial is making you see things that it knows will break you, but you must try to hold on. Please, it will all be over soon.”

Despite Linksano’s words, Ninja still attempted the futile task of moving his limbs. He would crawl to them if that’s what it took. He could not, would not, just lay here and do nothing! 

*Please...I must...save them...* Ninja’s handwriting was growing more and more illegible. *Cannot...let this...happen...not again...never again...* The others looked to him in confusion, wondering what this could mean. 

“You’re weak,” one burnt body taunted as it rose up from the ashes, completely black and charred, speaking through a gruesome flap in what was once a face. “Pathetic coward. Why couldn’t you save us? Are you too frightened or proud to do anything but save your own skin?”

“Murderer,” a severed head from a few feet away spat at him. “You’re a murderer.”

*No...No!* 

“Once a murderer, always a murderer.” The bodies began to chant, pieces of them breaking off and turning into dust and ash. Ninja’s eyes grew wider with horror as the bodies began to change form. They changed into people whose faces had been etched upon his heart, faces that he had not seen in decades. Their bodies were wrapped in black robes and adorned with throwing stars and kunai much as his had been many years ago. They were people who no longer walked this Earth, but whose spirits always stood by Ninja’s side in every battle, gave him strength in times of trouble, and haunted him in his nightmares.

“You have failed us, Shinobu! Where is your honor?” they cried, in voices filled with shame. “Have you forgotten all of what we have taught you? Have you forgotten about your family? Why did you not save us? Why did you allow us to die! Why?!”

Ninja’s insides writhed as though poisoned. He wanted to curse. He wanted to scream. He wanted to wail. He had to do something to ease the iron fingers that were digging into his throat that had prevented him from speaking for so many years. But all that came out was a choked groan that sent shivers down the spines of the others. They had never seen the fighter in such agony.

*...sorry...sorry...please forgive me...I’m sorry…* This was repeated over and over across the ninja’s card before his fingers weakened so much that the square slice of paper slipped from his fingers and settled atop the grass. Ninja’s head slipped as well, but he didn’t notice as the fragrant blades of grass pressed against his dampened cheeks. Ninja had never cried in front of the others before, but he could not even dream of stopping himself right now. It was preferable this way, having his vision blurred so he no longer could watch as those innocent men, women, and children were consumed by flames before crumbling into dust.

Linksano watched as the ninja finally gave up all hope of trying to move and he patted his back one last time. “I think you can all get up now,” he told the others. “Ninja will be still. You don’t have to worry.”

“But I am worried,” 90s Kid admitted as he released Ninja’s legs at last. “Look at him, man. He’s totally messed up.”

“It seems that is the nature of these trials,” Linksano muttered. “Whatever weapon we acquire after suffering through these situations must be quite powerful indeed.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” Linkara said. “That’s why we have to make sure it ends up in our hands and only our hands.”

“Kid, are you sure about this?” Harvey murmured softly so that the others wouldn’t hear. “I thought what happened to Doc was bad, but Ninja seems even worse off. What if that keeps happening to the rest of us? I know I can handle it, but I’m not really anticipating seeing you and Junior suffer.” This was only mostly true, since a small part of Harvey feared what such a trial would put him through, but that wasn’t important at the moment.

Linkara met Harvey’s worried gaze with one of determination. “We knew it would be harsh when we set out to do this, Harvey. We prepared as best as we could.”

“We did not prepare for that.” Harvey said, pointing to the silently weeping Ninja. 

“I know it’s terrible, Harvey,” Linkara continued, undeterred. “But once this is all over and we have this weapon, it will all have been worth it. Trust me.”

Harvey sighed and lit up another cigarette. “Alright, Kid. I’ll trust you.”

90s Kid had been sitting beside Ninja ever since releasing his hold on his legs and he couldn’t stop from staring at the man. Ninja had always been this strong, almost invincible figure in his eyes, and to see him like this was truly shocking, and a little scary. “Ninja-dude,” he said softly, wishing he could get through to him. “We’re all here for you.”

“He knows that, 90s Kid.” 90s Kid looked up at Linksano, who was also watching the ninja carefully. “But right now, he can’t hear you.”

“Murderer! Murderer! You killed us all Shinobu! You deserve to suffer! You deserve to die! You deserve to lose everything and everyone you hold dear! You deserve to be alone for the rest of your wretched life!”

Ninja closed his eyes, wishing for the first time in a long time for the sweet release of death to take him away. And then, there was silence.

\-----

When Ninja awoke, he tried to move his arms and legs and found that he could not. Panic flared within him as he thought that Linksano’s sedative had caused some sort of irreversible action, but then he realized that he was lying in a sleeping bag. A tilt of his head let him know that the others were sitting nearby in sleeping bags of their own, eating some of their food rations and looking quite weary and exhausted. He quickly wriggled out of the sleeping bag, any thoughts of falling asleep naturally forgotten, as burning, screaming bodies appeared to him every time he closed his eyes. 

The team noticed and the feeling of their stares almost overwhelmed Ninja, but they remained silent, unsure of what to say to their companion. At first Ninja found himself wishing that he could disappear to somewhere and be alone, to not be seen in this pitiful state. Soon after, however, Ninja realized that for once he did not desire to be completely alone, because he wanted the company of one specific person, but…that was not possible. That decision had been for the best, hadn’t it? But if that was correct, then…why did Ninja feel a yearning for Ted that he’d never felt for anyone in his life? No, no, Ted was safe, Ted was healthy and perfectly fine alone, and Ninja…Ninja was…

Ninja didn’t know anymore, and he didn’t really care either. All he wanted right then was to avoid the eyes of the team, as the humiliation still burned within him. They’d witnessed his tears, witnessed his break-down, witnessed him as the terrified child he tried so hard to forget. It was mortifying, so Ninja turned away, sitting as far from the others as possible, wishing he were alone while simultaneously hating the fact that he was alone.

After a few minutes had passed, Ninja felt a presence beside him and turned his head sharply, almost ready to snarl and hiss at whoever appeared, when he realized it was Linksano. He didn’t look much better than he had before, his complexion still pale and drawn with lines of exhaustion, but it was easier for him to speak now.

“Ninja,” Linksano said nervously, looking down at his shoes before offering something to him. “I can guess how you’re probably feeling right now, and I want you to know that it will get better. It’s slow going, yes, but in time the memories start to feel like the remnants of a terrible nightmare. That might not be of much comfort to you, but I thought I’d tell you anyway. I’m…sorry for what I did to you but I could not think of any other method to stop you,” he admitted, casting a tense look to Ninja as he did, as if expecting retaliation. When Ninja failed to react, he took a breath and continued. “Anyway, I thought you might feel better if you ate something. Even though we haven’t felt much desire for food or water while here, it’s best if we continue to eat on a somewhat regular basis, so please try and have something. I…I know two people who are counting on you to be in good health when we return from this place.”

Ninja took the bowl of soup and plate of bread silently from Linksano and still couldn’t find it in him to offer a reply. Linksano didn’t seem to mind though. “I’ll leave you in peace now.” With that, the scientist returned to where the others sat. Ninja looked down at the meal in his lap and sampled it slowly. Even though his insides still lurched if he wasn’t careful to control his thoughts, he felt a little less rattled after receiving such a heartfelt gesture.

Once he’d finished eating, Ninja realized that they had once again been transported inside the white, infinite hallway, which must have meant that his trial had been completed. He felt a small amount of relief at knowing he’d never have to lay eyes upon that sickeningly sweet slice of paradise again, especially since it might now come to haunt his dreams as his own personal hell. 

Ninja noticed that his comrades were standing up, gathering their packs and supplies. They must have been ready to head off for the third trial. Ninja stood as well, calling upon what remained of his strength, before he hesitantly walked over to where the others stood. He had sworn to Linkara to see this mission through to its end, and he would never go back on his word, no matter how hard his heart longed for the comforts of home. 

Ninja handed the empty dishes back to Linksano without comment before starting to move forward. Linkara looked to him as he passed and tried to thank him, as he’d done with Linksano, but the ninja brushed him off without sparing him even a glance and continued walking. As expected the others quickly fell into line behind him. 

“Does he look any better to you?” Harvey muttered to Linkara. 

“Not much,” Linkara admitted, “but he seems willing to continue, so I’m not going to question him now. If he wants to talk, he knows we’re here.”

“He never wants to talk,” Harvey mumbled. Together the five continued to walk forward with bated breath, all silently wondering what the next trial would be, and who would be forced to endure it.

\-----

Ted surveyed the students spread out across the dojo floor before him with a serious smile; one he was slowly growing used to wearing during his classes. 

“You’ve all worked very hard today and I am proud of your efforts. However, before we leave, I’d like to see you perform the five stances. First: front stance!”

The children, ranging in ages from 6-10, quickly bowed and shouted ‘Yoi’ before stepping forward with their left legs, knees bent, and positioning their arms correctly. Ted walked amongst the boys and girls, nodding in approval while also gently moving the limbs of those who needed a little assistance. 

“Very good. Next: back stance!” Once again the children shouted before adjusting the position of their legs to bend their right legs this time. “Nice work, Mallory,” Ted said softly to a particularly small girl with bright red curls. Mallory beamed up at him brightly; she had been staying after class for several days in order to master her stances, and her efforts had certainly paid off. 

“You are all showing me very nice work today. Now, I want you to show me: horse-riding stance!”

“Yoi!” As the children swung their legs outward and bent down, as if they were positioned atop a very tiny horse, a strange sound of creaking metal caught Ted’s attention. He tilted his head upwards, looking for the source of the sound, and felt his heart stop when he realized one of the large fluorescent light fixtures on the dojo ceiling was now hanging by one, thin metallic leg instead of four. No, it wasn’t hanging, it was...falling. 

“Look out!” Without even thinking, Ted lunged toward the center of the room, pushing as many children away from the area as he could. One small boy with glasses was staring transfixed at the plummeting fixture which was inches over his head, until Ted tackled him to the ground as gently as he could, wrapping his body protectively around the boy’s. A horrible sensation of pain soon arose from Ted’s left side, where the fixture collided with his ribs, and Ted saw spots dance before his eyes for a moment.

“Sensei!” Many of the children yelled as they crowded around Ted, looking at him with fear and worry. Ted was still fighting to hold in his moans of pain, which seemed to overwhelm him more every time he breathed. He didn’t want to frighten his students, though. They looked up to him and he wanted to continue to be the leader they trusted, so he opened his eyes and tried to mask his pain as best he could. The boy Ted had just saved still seemed a bit in shock by the incident, and Ted quickly tried to rouse himself up, ignoring the pain that blossomed as a result, before he set the boy on his feet. 

“Are you hurt, Steven? Do you need me to get the nurse?” he asked, checking over him carefully. He felt a brief moment’s relief when Steven shook his head no. 

“I-I’m okay, Sensei.”

Ted smiled. “Good. Don’t worry, I’d never let anything happen to a student on my watch. Okay, I think that’s the end of our class for t-today,” he groaned, getting himself to his feet and gingerly placing his hand to his side. “Everybody go get your things in order. I need to go apply some first aid to this.”

The students all gathered around each other and began chattering all at once about the incident, while Ted limped over to the back of the room where the offices of the different instructors could be found. After asking one of them to watch over his class until their parents arrived to collect the children, Ted made it inside his own small office, closed the door, and collapsed onto a chair with a loud groan. 

“Ohhhh...wow, that s-smarts.” Ted carefully undid the top part of his robes, being mindful to not let the fabric brush against his injured flesh, before he craned his neck downwards to study the damage. A massive bruise that was a sickly purplish color was covering a large amount of his left side, and there were moderate sized cuts along his skin as well. Ted felt ill simply looking at the injury, so he quickly pulled open his desk drawer and pulled out Ninja’s balm.

“Y-you have…once again saved me,” Ted said, glancing at the photo of Ninja he kept on his desk before he opened the jar, dug his fingers into the cool lotion, and very lightly started to dab it upon his wounds.

“Ahhh! Owowow!” he yelped as his fingers glided over the damaged skin. “I-I hope I didn’t break any ribs!” Ted had invited Boffo and 80s Dan to a movie that night, though technically Dan had not responded at all to his email, but even still he did not want to have to cancel on them all of a sudden. He had missed a few events with Boffo already and he did not want to let the clown down again.

It would also be difficult to continue teaching his class if Ted had suffered such a severe injury, even though said injury would heal quicker than normal thanks to Ninja’s balm. Ninja... 

Now that Ted was away from the eyes of his students, he allowed his mask to fall and let out a soft sob. What would Ninja say after learning about what had happened? Hadn’t Ted promised him that he wouldn’t be reckless anymore, that he would stay safe and strong until he returned? 

“I’m sorry for breaking my promise,” Ted murmured as he pulled his photo closer to him, the combination of pain and guilt causing a few tears to trickle down his cheeks. “I wanted you to be proud of me, but how can you be proud of such a failure?” The hand Ted wasn’t using to dab lotion on his side clutched the picture tightly. “I should have never allowed my students to train in such a dangerous setting. I should have asked to use another room, or demanded the building owner make the repairs he is always trying to avoid...” Ted sniffled and wiped his face with a tissue. Even though the pain in his side was already starting to recede, his heart remained heavy with it. “My students must think so poorly of me...you must think poorly too, Ninja. Perhaps it was for the best that we were separated...if I cannot protect myself, then there is nothing I can do for you...”

Ted stopped abruptly when he heard a timid knock on the door. He quickly wiped his face and tucked the tissue in his pocket, trying to calm himself, before he set the photo back in its rightful position. 

“Come in.”

He was rather surprised when Steven, Mallory, and many of the other students filed inside the room. 

“Sensei?” Steven asked timidly, peering at Ted through his thick frames. “Are you okay?”

Ted quickly put a smile on his face, wanting to remove any trace of guilt that might be residing inside the boy’s heart. “I’ll be just fine. I have this special balm here that was given to me by my own instructor, and it’s gonna make this feel better in no time at all.”

“It would feel much better if Ninja were here to apply it to me,” Ted couldn’t help thinking, and he nearly allowed his smile to fall before another student piped up. 

“Did the light do that to you too, Sensei?” Whitney wondered, pointing at the fresh scar that adorned Ted’s side. 

Ted bit his lip as he thought of the memory that was still so fresh. “Oh, no. That’s from a different injury that I got shortly before I started teaching here. My instructor was being attacked by some angry men with a knife, but I shielded him and the knife ended up getting me instead. I am okay, though. Especially since my instructor made sure I recovered fully,” Ted said softly, thinking back to how Ninja hadn’t left his side for a moment during his frail and sometimes painful recovery.

Ted’s reverie was interrupted by excited exclamations of awe. “Wow, Sensei, you must be the toughest guy ever!” a boy named Kenichi exclaimed. 

“What? Me?”

“And he’s the fastest too!” Mallory piped up. “He was like Superman flying to the rescue!”

“Oh, n-no, really-” Ted started to exclaim, his cheeks beginning to tint red. 

“He beat up that light like ‘Pow! Pow! Pow!’” another girl named Lisa shouted. 

“It was more that the light beat me up,” Ted admitted, although he couldn’t stop the smile that was starting to spread across his face. 

“Sensei Ted, are you in here?” Ted looked up in surprise when one of the mothers poked her head into the office, before he remembered he was half-dressed. 

“Ahh! I-I’m sorry, Mrs. Hernandez!” he cried, his whole face turning red as he struggled to pull his robes back on. 

“No, don’t do that,” the woman replied as she headed directly toward him, staring at his wound intently. “My son told me about what happened in your class. I’m a nurse, so please let me take a look at you.”

“Oh, there’s no need for that,” Ted tried to rebuff her. 

“Yeah, mom, he’s gotta magic potion to make him better!” her son, Jose, cried. 

“Um, no, I-I didn’t say I had that exactly,” Ted tried to explain, but the kids were too busy chattering away to pay his words any more attention. 

After studying him for a few minutes, Mrs. Hernandez looked up in surprise. “Well, that injury wasn’t nearly as bad I thought based on what I heard happened.”

“I, uh, heal quickly,” Ted said with a weak chuckle as he pulled his robe back up over his chest. 

“It seems you think quickly too,” she said with a fond smile. “You really saved the day.”

“Oh, it was nothing,” Ted muttered, looking down in embarrassment.

Mrs. Hernandez laughed and put an arm around her son. “Your students are lucky to have such a quick-witted teacher.”

“I feel lucky to have all of them,” Ted softly replied, feeling a warm glow arise in his chest as he took in the proud, smiling faces all around him. “And I guarantee you that I will call the building owner and have him repair what needs fixing before our next class begins.”

“I think all the parents will be calling the building owner after today,” Mrs. Hernandez said with a smirk. “Okay, kids, let’s give Sensei Ted some time to rest now.”

Mrs. Hernandez began ushering the students out of the room, though many still called out and waved to their instructor.

“Bye, Sensei Ted!”

“See you next week!”

“He was so awesome!”

“I can’t wait for the next class!”

Ted pressed his hand to his mouth for a moment as he tried once again to compose himself, though this time his tears were full of joy and amazement. When Ninja had first approached him about taking this job, he didn’t think he had what it took to be a teacher. In fact, during his first class Ted was so nervous and shaky that he feared the students might laugh at him, but instead they hung on his every word. As he continued on, Ted became more and more confident until he felt that he truly was someone who could impart knowledge to these kids. It was very rewarding to see them grow stronger under his teaching, and he couldn’t suppress his pride when he saw their accomplishments. This feeling also made him try even harder in his training sessions with Ninja, as his desire to become strong only grew. 

_“I truly have improved thanks to Ninja’s training,”_ Ted thought, closing his eyes. _“Even though I promised him I would remain safe, I would not be following his beliefs if I didn’t help protect those who need it.”_

Ted brought the photo of Ninja to his lips and kissed it gently. _“Ninja, even though I at times feel lost with your absence, I promise to never lose sight of your teachings. I will remain strong as I wait for your return, just as I know you are remaining strong no matter what challenges you come across.”_


	6. Chapter 6

Linkara walked with his team down the spotless white hallway, for how long he wasn’t sure, since his watch had stopped working the moment they’d entered this magical sub-universe. It may have been hours, it might even have been days; he wasn’t certain since the usual signifiers of passing time like hunger or fatigue never arrived. Instead of feeling relieved about not having to worry over such matters, this only added to the unsettled feeling that Linkara was experiencing. The aura around him and his team was much worse than it had been in a long time, and his companions were not doing well.

Linksano was more withdrawn and barely spoke a word, while every so often twitching and looking around in all directions, as if he’d heard something, and Ninja...well, there was no way to really tell what Ninja was thinking. He was keeping a great distance between himself and the rest of the team, which wasn’t a new thing really, but unsettling nonetheless. Ninja’s eyes had also never given off that thousand-yard stare before. No one had ever seen the fighter seem quite so miserable and it was an extremely uncomfortable thing to witness.

Linkara glanced back at 90s Kid, who was sticking close to Harvey’s side. He had easily caught on to the fact that the teenager was ignoring him, and as long as that didn’t affect the mission, Linkara didn’t really care about that. What he did care about was how the negative atmosphere was already affecting them, since 90s Kid was walking much more hesitantly now, as if afraid that every door around him might suddenly pop open so that some monster could drag him inside. He kept checking that bizarre Care Bear watch of his as well, which was useless since it had stopped functioning, and even more bizarrely he kept nuzzling it to his cheek. At least he didn’t seem as stressed out as Harvey, who was cursing more often than normal every time he tugged on a doorknob and failed to open it, and who was leaving a trail of cigarette butts behind him thanks to his recent chain-smoking. 

Linkara knew what he must do. He would gather them all together, offering words of comfort and a shoulder to cry on, before giving a rousing speech about the importance of moving forward. Rousing speeches always did the trick, and he was certain he could come up with a great one to lift their spirits and emphasize how their mission was too important to abandon now, so they must press on at all costs. Everything they’d suffered through would be worth it once they found and neutralized this weapon.

Just as he was beginning to compose the grand finale of the speech in his head, Linkara’s eyes flickered over to a door a few feet ahead of him which bore golden letters.

_TROBHAD_

“Everyone! It’s over here!” Linkara cried as he dashed ahead, already pulling out his Magic Gun and getting into position. After assembling and opening the door to once again find no enemies behind it, Linkara led the group inside, releasing a soft gasp when he realized he was standing in what looked like a castle’s banquet hall.

Swords and shields and armor of all types rested along the walls, and the ceiling seemed as high as the sky. A round table sat before them, filled with shimmering and gleaming dishes, and every chair neatly positioned for hungry occupants. A few steps forward revealed a throne, which was empty, and cobweb-covered iron chandeliers, which hung dim. Linkara was so overcome with excitement that he was nearly compelled to kneel at the throne himself, but he managed to keep in control. He had a mission to complete, so living out his knight-related fantasies could wait.

As they continued to walk through the majestic castle interior, Linkara noticed a white stone pillar in the center of the room with a silver scroll resting upon upon it, and he took off at a run for it. “Come on, guys! We’ve got a trial to do!” he said with an excitement that did not quite reach the others.

Linkara grabbed the scroll, examining it with an impressed expression. “It’s silver now. I wonder if that means something.” Without waiting for anyone else to comment, Linkara unrolled the shiny parchment and scanned his eyes over the words eagerly. “Words Can Conceal. Obey the Words: Obey the Voices that Will Guide You Along the True Path of a Hero.” Linkara gazed down at the bottom of the scroll, furrowing his brows slightly. “Huh. This is different too. It looks like there are five silver checkmarks at the bottom of the scroll.”

“What does all that junk mean?” 90s Kid wondered, looking to Harvey, who shrugged. 

“Beats me. I never was good with riddles-”

“Ah! Ow! Damn it!” Harvey broke off when he heard Linkara’s sudden screams of pain. Linkara was grimacing and clutching at his head as if it were about to split in two. 

“Kid, what is it?” Harvey hurried to Linkara’s side, searching for whatever had caused his sudden ailment. 

“It’s m-my...ugh...my head,” Linkara moaned, staggering a few steps back until his back hit the solid rock of the castle wall. 

“A migraine?” Linksano wondered, taking a cautious step toward Linkara. 

“No...n-no, it’s...these voices.”

“Voices?” Harvey asked, trying to place his hands on the younger man’s shoulders to steady him. 

“In my h-head. All of a sudden they-start, stop, leave, go,” Linkara murmured, squeezing his eyes shut as the voices grew louder. “Save her, run away, solve the mystery, ride into the sunset. All these v-voices...ah...they won’t s-stop…stop it…God…”

Harvey’s expression grew even more worried and he quickly turned to Linksano. “Doc, this sounds like your area of expertise. Help the Kid out, quick.”

“What do you mean my area of expertise?” Linksano snapped, the memories of his trial once again flooding his mind. “Do you think I’m constantly battling psychotic voices that tell me to do unspeakable things?”

Harvey stared at him, almost at a loss for words. “I mean, you’ve gotta have a painkiller for headaches in your bag, right?” he finally answered. 

Linksano’s face flushed. “Right.” He hurriedly searched through his medical bag before pulling out the appropriate bottle and shaking a few pills into his hand. “Here.” He offered the pills to Linkara, but jumped back like a frightened animal when a wild swing of Linkara’s arm knocked the medicine to the floor. 

“Kid!” Harvey again tried to grab onto Linkara, but he pulled away and started moving away from the group. 

“Excalibur!” Linkara cried, his eyes wide and manic. “The voices-they say I have to get Excalibur! That’s something a h-hero would wield! Excalibur!” Still yelling wildly, while holding onto the sides of his head, Linkara rushed outside, into the wilderness.

“Follow him! We can’t let him run around like that by himself!” Harvey ordered, and everyone quickly ran after Linkara. 

Linkara ran, panting and clutching at his forehead with one hand, darting to and fro as many different voices tried to offer him directions. “Will one of you just pick left or right and stick to it?!” he shouted to no one, and the others began to look around. 

“Uh, guys, I think we should go that way,” 90s Kid piped up, pointing to a long, curved trail that led to a hilltop. 

“The voices are telling me to keep going straight, 90s Kid.”

“But like-”

“No buts! I have to listen to them or else I’m never going to pick the right path!” Linkara snapped back, causing 90s Kid to grumble and reluctantly pick up his pace. They kept running along a path that curved around and around in many different directions for about ten more minutes, with Linkara changing direction every so often, until they finally circled back to the path that 90s Kid tried to originally direct them onto, which only led to more muttering from the teen. 

The five slowly climbed up the hilltop until Linkara approached the legendary sword in the stone, Excalibur. It was nearly glowing, bathed in emerald green light, and as he drew closer, Linkara could see the inscription on the hilt. His smile spread wide across his face. He was going to be the hero. He was going to be King Arthur! As the others watched him curiously, Linkara placed both hands on the hilt and drew the sword from the stone, as if he were pulling a knife out of soft butter. He held it high into the air and beamed at his team. 

“Got it!”

Linkara’s victory proved to be short-lived, however, as the sword almost instantly vanished from his hands, leaving him wobbling slightly as the voices in his head seemed to increase in volume. “Ow! Damn it all!” he moaned while rubbing at his temples again. 

“Kid, I’m begging ya, take the pills, please.” Harvey approached Linkara with medicine that had not been dropped on the dingy floor of an old castle and a bottle of water. 

Linkara groaned before downing the pills in one swallow. “I just d-don’t understand...why didn’t that work? I-I followed the voices...I freed Excalibur like a t-true hero would...so why...?”

Linkara seemed as if he might fall over at any second, so Harvey quickly laid an arm across his shoulders so he could steady himself. “I don’t know, Kid, but I don’t think you should keep running off willy-nilly like that.”

“Yeah, man, you should probably take it easy for now,” 90s Kid agreed, his animosity currently replaced by fear. He couldn’t stop looking from Linkara’s pained expression to Ninja’s solemn one, and Linksano’s nervous one, each expression only causing him to feel worse. “Maybe we should all, like, take a break and rest, you know?”

“No!” Linkara shook his head ferociously and pulled up the scroll to read once again. “I refuse to stop until these damned voices have b-been silenced for good.” His eyes pored over the words again, looking for any tricks or loopholes he might have missed, while completely failing to realize that the number of checkmarks had lessened from ten to nine, before his forehead crinkled and he grimaced again with pain.”N-no...owww…stop it...w-what are you saying? The...Lady of...Shallot? Where...the tower? The tower! I will go and...and save her!”

“Kid, stop!” Harvey watched in frustration as Linkara once again set off on an unsteady path through the lush wilderness. “Come on, we gotta keep up with him!” he called to the others before setting off at a run. 

By the time they caught up to him, Linkara was already halfway up the side of a stone tower, having climbed it with his bare hands if the blood dripping down the stones was anything to go by. “Kid!” Harvey cried out in a panic upon noticing the stains. “You’re hurting yourself! Come back here so Doc can treat you!”

“Linkara-dude, please!” 90s Kid begged as well. “You’re really scaring me!”

“I have...to save her...” Linkara grunted, continuing to climb higher. 

Harvey turned helplessly to the other members of their group. “Can’t you do anything to stop him?”

Ninja merely sat down at the base of tree, keeping his head lowered and his hands together. There was nothing a pitiful waste of a human being like him could do right now. Linksano also sat down, still keeping his distance from the others for the time being. “His injuries aren’t life-threatening,” he murmured. “I can treat him when he climbs back down.”

“But he’s not gonna climb back down! Doesn’t anybody get that?” Harvey was at the end of his rope, panic and worry overtaking him as Linkara continued to climb ever higher. 

Suddenly, Linkara’s blood-soaked fingers slipped from the stone and he began to fall. Harvey could only watch in horror as Linkara hurtled through the air at a rapid speed. His whole body turned to lead and his heart plummeted alongside the man he loved, but before he could even start to scream, a flash of black hurtled up into the air. Seconds later, Ninja-Style Dancer landed gracefully on the ground, Linkara held safely in his arms.

Harvey immediately rushed over to them, looking at Linkara with an expression of anger and relief. “Thank God you’re alive, because I’m gonna kill ya myself!” he exclaimed before squeezing his shoulders again. “Dammit, Kid, you can’t scare me like that, you just can’t! Alright, this stops right now. We’re finishing this thing up later; right now we need to get the Kid fixed up. Ninja, carry him. Doc, check out his hands. Junior, help me grab this stuff.” There was such a tone of authority in his voice that he sounded more like the Captain Finevoice of years past rather than the mellow lounge singer of the present, and nobody dared dream of disobeying Harvey’s orders.

Linkara, who had passed out from shock during the fall, was both astounded and embarrassed when he woke up to his head in Harvey’s lap, with bandages on his hands, and Harvey’s fingers stroking through his hair. “What the hell is this?” he bellowed, sitting up and ignoring the pain that followed. “I d-didn’t give the okay for a retreat!”

Harvey reached for him and tried to pull him back down again. “Do you realize what could have happened if I didn’t? You nearly got yourself killed!” Harvey told him, refusing to let the man go. “You nearly scared me into giving up the ghost! Kid, we’re all counting on you and you-you can’t just do that-” Harvey’s voice cracked and Linkara quit struggling, looking to Harvey with concern. 

“Harvey, I’m f-fine. I was just d-doing what I needed to do. Nothing bad was g-going to happen to m-me.”

“You don’t know that.” Harvey murmured, his gaze no longer upon him, but looking through him, to a time where he’d had nothing left to live for. “And I wasn’t gonna let you keep going unless I was sure we knew what we were getting into.”

Linkara sighed, wanting to placate Harvey, but finding it very difficult to keep his emotions in check when there were still several voices squabbling in his head. “H-Harvey, I’m sorry for worrying you...ow...b-but I promise you that I know what I’m g-getting into. N-none of this is real, remember? None of it really means anything because it’s all some kind of m-magical illusion created by this world.”

“But your hands, Kid,” Harvey tried to protest, looking down at the bright white bandages he now sported. 

“They d-don’t hurt nearly as much as the voices do,” Linkara said, suddenly turning a pitiful expression on Harvey. “You w-want me to get rid of these voices, right?”

“Of course I do, Kid.”

“Then you h-have to...ow...let me keep going until I p-pass this stupid trial.”

Harvey continued staring into Linkara’s eyes until the pain he could see within forced him to turn away. “Alright, Kid. I can’t stand knowing you’re suffering like this. I guess we can keep going.”

“Thanks, Harvey.” Linkara managed a smile before he climbed back to his feet. “Now, I have to g-get back up that tower and...” Linkara trailed off when he noticed a beautiful young woman was standing in the window high above him, gazing down at him and his crew in shock. “No...damn it all...sh-she wasn’t supposed to look down here!” Linkara groaned as the tower and the lady vanished before his eyes, just as the sword had done before. The voices screamed their displeasure at him before offering multiple new suggestions for what he could do. 

Harvey watched him anxiously stagger around again before he finally settled on a path leading further into the forest. “The...H-Holy Grail...we...we have to find it...” Linkara said, gesturing for the others to follow him. “Finding it will...m-make me a true hero for sure...oww...”

As they walked along, the forest grew wilder and denser; as trees tall enough to tower over the travelers spread their branches out so wide that the sky was becoming obscured, making everything darker and quieter too. 90s Kid whimpered softly as they headed deeper into the woods, keeping as close to Harvey as he could. “I-I really don’t like this,” he whispered. 

“I know, Junior, but we have to do what the Kid says until we can figure out how to end this thing.” Harvey patted 90s Kid’s shoulder before he glanced back at Ninja, who was again trailing the group. “Thanks again for what you did back there. If anything had seriously happened to the Kid, I...I don’t know if I coulda kept going.”

*I will never again miss an opportunity to save a life* Ninja held up in response. He might be a worthless shell of a human being, but he would spend the rest of his life repenting for that fact and hopefully, one day, he would be forgiven.

Linkara kept taking them in deeper and deeper, occasionally having to rest against a tree when the pounding in his head became too much to bear. “T-this way...no wait...it’s behind us...no...argh, why can’t they decide on something...?”

The others were very unnerved by the situation, and even Ninja didn’t look to be on his guard at all anymore. 90s Kid was growing more and more upset as they were led deeper and deeper into the woods, to the point where Harvey had to lead him along by his arm so he wouldn’t stop or turn around. 

“Linkara, I fail to see how we are going to find this fabled grail if we can’t even see our hands in front of our faces,” Linksano said from somewhere, though nobody knew the exact location. 

“The grail will be...nngh...bathed in light w-when we find it,” Linkara panted out, trying to figure out which way to carry his legs next. 

“Kid, I don’t know if this plan is gonna work out. You sure those voices ain’t telling you about something else?”

“I’m sure, H-Harvey! Just keep going! This w-would all go a lot f-faster if you’d just listen to m-me!”

“Dude, we don’t even know where we’re going or if the Holy Grail is even out here!” 90s Kid suddenly piped up, startling the others into stopping. “If we keep listening to you, we’re never going to get anywhere! Why don’t you let Ninja-dude and I look for it, we’re good at figuring out where stuff is!”

Linkara turned on 90s Kid and glared, feeling his head throb with anger. “90s Kid, I am the leader here, and–oh jeez–you will listen to my instructions!”

“I’m sick of listening to you!” 90s Kid yelled, his frustration at the futile search and fear of the dark rising up to claim him. “You haven’t had one good idea this whole time!”

Linkara’s eyes flashed with anger. “Y-you of all people are going to tell me that? Who was the one who...ahhh...who wasted all the p-power cells in the BFG because Youngblood was renewed? W-who tried to...skateboard off the roof of the apartment building?”

“Th-that was different!” 90s Kid protested, his face slightly reddening as he flushed in embarrassment. 

“Well you know what? You might be sick of m-my ideas, but I’m sick of your...your...oh God.” Harvey rushed forward as Linkara fell to his knees, the pain in his head overwhelming him. 

“Kid, are you okay?”

“Grrr...ahhh...owowow...damn...it...okay, fine...we break for h-half an hour. Dismissed...owww...”

Harvey cast a pleading expression to 90s Kid, begging him to not continue his argument with Linkara for the time being, and despite how annoyed he felt, 90s Kid nodded in agreement. Linkara was not looking well at all, so there was no point in fighting when he was too far gone to listen to reason. Relieved, Harvey mouthed a word of thanks to the teenager before he helped Linkara over to a soft patch of grass where a few shafts of sunlight managed to peek through the foliage. 

\-----

90s Kid watched as once again Linkara rested his head in Harvey’s lap and tried to close his eyes. Harvey did his best to make him feel comfortable, stroking his scalp once again and speaking to him in low, loving words that no one else could hear. 90s Kid saw the love and tenderness shining in Harvey’s eyes and he felt a raw, hungry ache well up inside him that caused him to turn his head away from the pair.

His gaze landed on Ninja, who was sitting at the base of a tree and staring intently at one of his notecards. From his view, it seemed to 90s Kid as if it were covered not with words but merely splotches of ink, and when a sudden breeze bent the front of the card downwards, 90s Kid realized what was on the paper. The splotches of ink, red in color, had been crudely shaped into the image of Kung-Tai Ted’s smiling face. 90s Kid felt a wave of empathy for the fighter and he started to stand up, but his movements caught Ninja’s attention. Instantly he was gone, having disappeared into the highest branches of the tree where he was no longer visible to the others, obviously not in the mood for conversation of any sort. 

90s Kid sighed and sat back down, still feeling restless and disgruntled, before turning his attention to Linksano. The scientist had taken out some of his gadgets to test if they were still functional, including his finger beams, what looked to be a Geiger counter, and the communicator. 90s Kid’s eyes landed upon that last device and the anxiety inside him was swiftly enveloped by his desire for home. There had been very little about this mission that had been enjoyable so far and 90s Kid couldn’t help but wish that he had refused to go in the first place. If he had, he would still be home safe and sound, not watching his closest friends being wrecked by invisible monsters they seemed unprepared to fight and, more importantly, he would still be with Dan. 

Dan. 90s Kid closed his eyes and tried not to whimper as he thought about the older man. How long had it been since he’d last seen Dan? Since he’d heard him laugh, told him he loved him, kissed him good night? There was no way to know; for all 90s Kid knew years could have passed in the real world. This thought terrified the teen. What would have happened to Dan if it turned out 90s Kid really had been gone for a year or longer? Would he have been able to stay strong as he promised, or would he have...90s Kid refused to entertain any other notion. Dan would stay strong. He must stay strong, even if he needed another bit of encouragement to accomplish this.

An idea suddenly sprung to 90s Kid’s mind, one he was sure Linkara would reject outright, but he didn’t particularly care about what Linkara thought right now. 90s Kid snuck another glance at Harvey and Linkara, making certain they were too busy to notice him, before he plopped down beside Linksano and said to him in a soft, whispered voice, “Linksano-dude…I need a favor.”


	7. Chapter 7

Linksano turned to 90s Kid with a wary expression. He still wasn’t feeling his best and he’d thought running basic diagnostics on his tools might help to calm his mind, but now that 90s Kid was here, any tranquility he might find was sure to be shattered. “What is it, 90s Kid?”

“Um...does that communicator work?”

Linksano nodded, holding the device in his fingers. “Yes, it is working optimally. Linkara entrusted me with the communicator just in case we needed to have Nimue bail us out of a life-or-death situation and-” Linksano suddenly stared at 90s Kid. “90s Kid, are you honestly going to suggest what I think you’re going to suggest? You realize that Linkara would think you guilty of treason.”

90s Kid sighed, nodding. “I know, but I can’t go on like this anymore, man. I’m just so…scared and lonely,” he admitted, leaning back against a tree and looking up at the night sky. “I keep thinking about Dan, and how scared and lonely he must be too, and how we don’t even know how long we’ve been out here, and all sorts of junk.”

“I know how you feel, 90s Kid. I’m worried about Boffo too. He must be climbing the walls back home. He’s never been one to deal with loneliness well; he’d be the type to invite a burglar right in the front door and offer him tea,” Linksano muttered, shuddering at the thought. Then he shook his head. “But we can’t just do this unless we truly feel like it’s necessary. What if the signal causes an ambush?”

“Dude, Linkara’s been totally bogus about everything lately,” 90s Kid replied, being careful to keep his voice down. “He’s had so many, like, totally awful ideas and it’s like he doesn’t care about any of us right now. He doesn’t get how hard it is to be here alone cuz he’s never alone when we go on missions,” he grumbled, shooting another envious glance at Harvey and Linkara.

Linksano sighed, looking down at the communicator again. “He has been something of an unsympathetic tyrant lately...but you realize that if Linkara catches us, he’ll have us hanging from the highest yardarm.”

*I don’t doubt that for a moment.* 

90s Kid and Linksano flinched in shock when they saw Ninja suddenly appear before them. “Oh, uh, Ninja-dude! We, uh, we were-”

*Relax. I am not here to disclose your plan to Linkara. I couldn’t help overhearing, and I would also like in on this plan.* The two men were stunned; Ninja was never one to breach Linkara’s orders like this. Normally he would never even think about disobeying commands, but the living hell that had been his trial had broken down many of Ninja’s mental barriers, leaving him scared and vulnerable, as much as he hated to admit it. Though he would chastise himself later for being weak, Ninja needed to send a message back home now if he could not return there personally.

90s Kid turned to Linksano. “See? Ninja-dude’s on my side. C’mon, Linksano, please?”

Linksano heaved a sigh and pointed a stern finger at 90s Kid. “If Linkara finds out, this was _your_ idea.”

“I’ll take the blame,” 90s Kid said without hesitation. “Just show us how to do it.”

“Alright. Now, keep your voices down and listen closely for the furious cries of our impaired leader,” Linksano instructed as he started fiddling with the dials of the communicator. A low buzzing noise made them all jump and glance quickly at where the two were resting, but neither man seemed to notice that anything was amiss. 

After several more minutes of adjusting the frequency and stabilizing the device, Linksano looked to the others. “I’m ready to open the channel that connects this device to Nimue. We must make these messages brief, because we cannot let the channel be open for longer than a minute if we do not want to risk exposure.” Linksano knew that a minute should not be enough time for others to track the signal with normal means, so he silently prayed that no other scientists or magic-users were searching for them. “Are you ready with your messages?”

“Yeah,” 90s Kid said, nodding resolutely. “Tell Nimue to tell Dan that I love him and miss him and that I’ll come home to him soon.” 90s Kid knew the message would be shorter than Dan would hope for, but it was the best he could do while following Linksano’s conditions. 

“My message to Boffo will be almost identical to yours, so there’s a bit of luck for us,” Linksano murmured before turning to Ninja. “What about you? I know you are not commonly fond of expressing romantic affection in front of others, but this might be your only chance to talk to your paramour for some time. What do you wish to say to him, Ninja?”

Ninja held up a stack of cards with various things written on them and Linksano balked. “We don’t have time for a whole love poem!” he snapped testily before looking around to make sure he hadn’t been overheard. 

Ninja sighed and tucked those cards away, holding up a different sign instead. *Very well. Tell Ted that I am physically unharmed and that I shall return to him when able, and that I...I love him and miss him and hope that he has been caring for himself in my absence.* Ninja blushed beneath his mask and turned his head away as he held up those words to the others. He was too embarrassed to show them what he truly wished he could say to Ted at that moment – like that he wished he had brought an actual photograph of the man with him for starters – but he pledged that he would express the full depth of his feelings to him once he was safe in the privacy of Ted’s apartment. 

Linksano did not respond but merely entered in the message as quickly as possible, shooting Linkara one more furtive glance before he sucked in a breath. “Here we go.” He opened the signal and pressed send, transmitting the messages to Nimue. Once sent, Linksano quickly shut off the communicator and hid it in his pocket for a moment in case Linkara stirred. 

“Thanks, Linksano-dude. I know it wasn’t the best idea, but I think it was the right one,” 90s Kid told him softly. 

Linksano sighed. “Just be sure to have a good excuse ready for Linkara if the cavalry storms in.”

90s Kid nodded. “I will, dude.” He glanced again at Linkara and Harvey, watching Linkara grimace in pain with more sympathy than he had before. “I think I’m gonna go check on them. I know Linkara’s being a jerk now, but I know he’s gotta be hurting with those voices in his head. That would totally hurt me too, so I should try and, like, not argue with him for now.”

“A wise decision,” Linksano said as he quickly stowed the communicator back in his bag. 

90s Kid stood and gazed down at his teammates. Even though they still seemed twitchy and somewhat anguished, there also seemed to be a measure of peace in their expressions for the first time since their trials had ended, and 90s Kid felt a little less guilty about his act of deception. He left the two to recuperate on their own and slowly made his way to the soft patch of grass where Linkara was resting. 

Harvey nodded at his approach and gestured for 90s Kid to sit beside him, which he did. “How’s he doing?” 90s Kid whispered, since Linkara seemed to have his eyes closed at the moment and he didn’t want to risk waking him if he had managed to fall asleep. 

“Not great,” Harvey admitted. “Those voices are really wearing him down. I don’t know what’s gonna happen if he keeps following their kooky instructions and running all over this huge forest. I just wish he would listen to us and calm down so we could try to come up with a plan.” Harvey reached for a cigarette and lit up before he asked in a very casual manner, “So what were you three knuckleheads up to over there? I saw you huddled together and now I’m wondering what the damage will be.” He was trying to sound light-hearted and almost playful, but 90s Kid could feel the tension in his words.

90s Kid looked down and his stomach squirmed with guilt. He would have been able to come up with a lie instantly if Linkara had been asking him the question, but feeling Harvey’s eyes on him was almost too much to bear. He hated lying to Harvey, especially since he knew that the singer had taught him that he could manage anything as long as he was honest and kept him in the know. Would Harvey be as furious as Linkara if he found out what they had done? Would he understand and keep it a secret like the rest of them? 

90s Kid realized that he had better say something if he wanted to keep up the ruse and coughed softly. “Uh, I-I know it looks weird,” he began, trying to get his voice to come through like it normally did. “But I was just checking on Linksano and Ninja-dude. They’ve been looking pretty rough since all this junk happened, and I just wanted to make sure they were okay. Yeah.” 90s Kid still refused to meet Harvey’s face. 

Harvey stared at 90s Kid and took another drag on his cigarette. There was definitely something off about him, and he was trying to gauge if 90s Kid was just feeling odd because of the stress of the mission, or if 90s Kid was lying to him about what was really going on. He almost had the same obvious tells that Charlie had when he was lying, acting very fidgety and refusing to look him in the eye. Harvey knew that 90s Kid was extremely honest and was easily stirred by guilt, so he didn’t prefer to lie about things, and if he did, he usually had an emotional outburst of the truth when it became too much to hold in. 

Harvey determined that 90s Kid wasn’t telling the truth and placed a hand on his shoulder, causing 90s Kid to flinch. “Are you sure that’s what’s going on, Junior? You know that if something’s bugging you, you can tell me.”

90s Kid looked up into Harvey’s face and swallowed, then cast a nervous glance at Linkara. “Um. Can we talk alone?”

Harvey nodded and silently gestured for Ninja to approach. “Keep an eye on the Kid, will ya?” Ninja nodded and sat down beside Linkara; keeping watch as Harvey and 90s Kid walked a safe distance away, behind a small cluster of pine trees. “Now,” Harvey told him, stubbing out his cigarette and looking down at the teen. “What’s going on here? What are you holding back?”

“I know you’re gonna be mad,” 90s Kid said softly, looking down at the dirt and sliding his hands into the pockets of his shorts. “But Ninja and Linksano and I were feeling really bad, and we were all really missing everybody back home, so we...we just…wanted them to know that we were all okay and missing them, so we sent out these, like, messages to Nimue.”

Harvey’s eyes widened in surprise. “You what? Are you saying you three broke the Kid’s orders and used the communicator without permission?” 90s Kid closed his eyes and nodded, hunching up his shoulders as he waited for Harvey’s reaction. The singer let out a loud sigh and balled his hands into fists. “Junior, how could you do that? Even if you were feeling bad, you know how dangerous it is to give away our position, not to mention how dangerous it is to disobey the Kid.”

“I know, Harvey, and I’m really sorry for putting us in danger, but...but I’m not sorry that we tried to reach the others.” 90s Kid looked up then, meeting Harvey’s gaze and trying to keep his expression from wavering. “Linksano and Ninja were really, really messed up. They went through some really awful junk and they were hurting real bad, Harvey. But after doing this, they look better, like maybe some of the bad stuff from before doesn’t hurt as much or something. I totally think it helped them, because I know it helped me to imagine Dan hearing that I’m okay. So I know it was wrong and when we get home, I’ll tell Linkara what I did, but for now...” 90s Kid’s expression turned pleading. “For now, will you keep it a secret, Harvey? Please?”

Harvey pulled out his handkerchief and wiped his forehead as he sighed once again. “Alright, Junior. You’re putting me in a real bad spot here, but I know your heart was in the right place, so for now, I swear I won’t tell the Kid that you sent those messages to Nimue.”

“You did what?!” 90s Kid and Harvey both jumped a foot in the air when they heard that angry voice behind them. Linkara had hobbled over to their cluster of trees, his face a mask of fury as he glared at 90s Kid. Ninja and Linksano were following behind him at a close distance, looking equally nervous. “Did I-I just hear that right? Y-you sent out messages to Nimue? With the c-communicator?”

90s Kid’s heart plummeted to his shoes with a sickening thud. Linkara turned to Linksano, who was pale and fiddling with his fingers compulsively. “G-get up here and tell m-me: how did this h-happen?” Linkara spit out through clenched teeth, looking angrier than any of them had ever seen him. Lack of adequate rest and a blinding headache that lingered for what felt like days had worn his patience completely thin. “W-why would you let him d-do that?! I should have y-you fired!”

Linksano cowered and opened his mouth to speak, his body trembling, but 90s Kid stopped him. “It was my idea,” he said, though white-faced and frightened as he saw Linkara’s eyes blaze fire at him. “Don’t blame the others for this. I asked him to and they followed my lead.”

“90s Kid, I am c-completely furious!” Linkara shouted, his voice echoing through the trees. “I told you w-what could h-happen if you did t-that! You d-disobeyed my orders and could h-have gotten us all killed! Maybe the enemy is at D-Dan’s right now! Or Ted’s, or maybe in the base with B-Boffo! They could all w-wind up dead because of you!”

“Criminy’s sake, Kid, calm down!” Harvey cried out in shock, wincing from the looks of horror on Ninja and Linksano’s faces. 

“D-don’t you tell me to calm down!” Linkara snapped back before turning to 90s Kid again. “I have h-had it with your insubordination, 90s Kid! If you w-want to be a hero, then you have to learn h-how to grow up and k-keep a secret! You took an oath to p-protect the Earth and everyone on it, and if y-you don’t like it, you can g-go and not come back!”

“Go to hell, Linkara! I’m sick of your bullshit!” 90s Kid shouted, his face red with anger. Even in his wrath, Linkara was stunned. 90s Kid never swore at anyone, even in jest, and he’d never even muttered a hard swear word like that before. To the others, it was almost more frightening than Linkara’s angry tirade. “I did the right thing! You don’t care about Dan or Boffo or Ted or any of us! All you care about is being the hero and doing everything your way! You’ve totally wasted all of our time in this trial and you won’t even listen to us! We’re supposed to be a team, man, not just you and your brainless followers! I’m _sick_ of you pushing me around like this and not caring at all about how I feel or what I want to do! YOU’RE A HERO BUT YOU’RE NOT PERFECT, OKAY?!” 90s Kid lost it, raising his voice as loud as it could go.

Linkara’s face twitched and something snapped within him. He was no longer the charming comic book lover who presented funny reviews on the Internet, but rather a furious, wild-eyed madman. He let out a scream of rage and, before he knew what he was doing, he punched 90s Kid in the face with all the strength he had. 

90s Kid reeled, stunned for a moment as his broken sunglasses fell to the ground, before he lunged at Linkara, knocking him down and pounding his fists on his chest. Linkara swiftly flipped them over, wrapping his hands around 90s Kid’s throat, and soon they were both shouting incoherently in a full-on brawl, fists flying and legs kicking violently. The others, who took a moment to recover from shock, quickly rushed over to separate them, Ninja and Linksano grabbing the flailing 90s Kid, while Harvey did the same for Linkara. The two kept growling and spitting at each other until they were dragged to opposite sides of the patch of grass, a safe distance apart.

“90s Kid! Control yourself, please!” Linksano begged as he struggled to hold onto the teen’s arm. 

*Remember that Linkara is suffering just as we all are* Ninja offered, managing to take both of 90s Kid’s arms so that Linksano could take a rest. 

“He punched me!” 90s Kid protested, still feeling the sting in his eye.

*He has been pushed to his limits and is not thinking clearly. You know he would never strike you if he were in his right mind. Nor would you strike him.* 90s Kid’s struggling stopped as he took in this fact. He had not only hit Linkara, but yelled at him. Insulted him. Linkara. The man he admired and wanted to be like more than anyone else. How could he have done such a thing? 

Sensing his thoughts, Ninja released 90s Kid’s arms, allowing him the chance to gingerly examine his swiftly blackening eye. Linksano opened his medical bag and prepared a cold compress, which 90s Kid gratefully pressed against his injury, while Ninja retrieved his broken sunglasses. With a quick wave from one of his many devices, Linksano repaired them back to perfect condition.

*Do not let this world get to you, 90s Kid* Ninja said as he offered him his glasses. *The purpose of these trials seems to be to push whoever endures them to their physical, emotional, and mental limits.* 

“Yeah, but…I haven’t done anything yet and I still lost my cool,” 90s Kid realized, the guilt starting to settle in his stomach again. “Even though Linkara’s making me totally mad lately, I should be stronger than that. How can anyone depend on me if I can’t be strong, or follow orders, or keep my cool when I really need to?” 90s Kid moaned and turned around, slipping the sunglasses back onto his face and over the compress. “I’m totally useless. Linkara was right; I should have just stayed home…I don’t have what it takes to be a hero.”

There was a brief moment where 90s Kid continued to wallow in self-pity before a soft voice broke through his gloomy thoughts. “Do you know what I admire about you, 90s Kid?” 90s Kid looked up in surprise at Linksano, since he’d never imagined hearing that the scientist admired anything about him. “It’s your bravery. Even though you disobeyed orders, what you decided to do tonight for Dan and Boffo and Ted...and for Ninja and myself...it was very brave. So thank you for...for helping make me feel just a bit better in spite of everything.”

Ninja nodded. *I concur. Thank you, 90s Kid, for helping me reach out to Ted. You might not be a superhero, but you are a kind, caring person who I am proud to call my friend.* 90s Kid blushed softly at their words. It felt good to be praised even though he knew what he’d done had been stupid. He might still make mistakes and let his emotions get the better of him at times, but 90s Kid mentally vowed to make up for his weaknesses as soon as he could. 

“Thanks, dudes.” 90s Kid adjusted his compress once again before glancing across the grass. “I know I have to make up with Linkara. I just hope he can forgive me.”

\-----

On another side of the small meadow, Harvey turned on Linkara with eyes blazing. “What the hell is wrong with you?!” he shouted. “Cripes, I know he pissed you off, but you didn’t have to slug him! You’re better than that!”

“Are you f-forgetting what he d-did, Harvey?!” Linkara yelled back, rubbing his sore chest. “H-he could have r-ruined this whole m-mission!”

“We’re gonna lose this mission anyway if we end up killing each other first! Junior’s only a boy!”

“He b-beat me up!”

“Not until you threw the first punch! You hit back, you don’t hit first! He was only trying to keep the doc and the ninja from losing their minds! I can’t believe you’d do that to him, Kid!”

Some of Linkara’s ire faded when he saw how genuinely angry Harvey was. He’d never been this upset with his boyfriend before. “Harvey, I’m s-sorry. I didn’t m-mean to…” He placed a hand on Harvey’s arm and Harvey flung it off immediately. 

“You’re not sorry because of what you did, Kid, you’re sorry because I’m angry!”

Linkara swallowed, unsure of how to respond. He knew how much Harvey doted on 90s Kid ever since they’d returned from their road trip together, so of course Harvey would be furious at him. Linkara was also starting to comprehend what he’d just done. Through the blur of voices that hadn’t stopped shrieking in his ear since his trial had started, reality was starting to pierce through, and Linkara realized with growing horror that he had actually struck 90s Kid. 90s Kid, who he normally was protective of at all costs, even when it drove the teen crazy. 

“I...I d-don’t...” he tried to say, but Harvey sighed and shook his head. 

“Save it. I don’t wanna hear it right now. I know you’re going through a lot, but...just keep your distance, alright?” With that, Harvey turned and walked away to where the other three were standing, and Linkara watched him go with a sinking heart. 

“H-Harvey...” he whispered, knowing that he needed to figure out a way to make things right for everyone, and fast.

 _“Leave them,”_ the voices cried, rising in volume and growing angry. 

“No,” Linkara growled, clutching at his temples as if trying to keep his skull from cracking. He took a few stumbling steps into the woods, hoping the cold air and bramble bushes would distract him from their incessant screaming. 

_“You must keep going, must find the Grail, must be a hero. Leave them, leave them, leave them!”_

“Shut up!” Linkara cried, breaking off at a run now, desperate to escape this miserable world and find even one second of solitude. His arms and face were soon covered in scratches, his clothing snagged by branches that reached out to him like eager clawed hands.

_“They only hold you back. They don’t trust you. They don’t obey you. You can never be a hero when you’re being dragged down by those useless lumps. Leave them leave them leave them!”_

“I said shut up!” Linkara screamed, his voice choked with pain and rage, not only because of the voices but because of what the voices had driven him to do. “You made me hurt my friends! You made me hurt myself! I-I am not listening to you stupid voices anymore!” Linkara stopped running when he spotted something that would be useful to him at last. He bent down, grabbing a large, moss-covered rock from the ground, and lifted it over his head. 

_“Leave them, find the grail, leave them LEAVE THEM LEAVE THEM!”_

“If you won’t shut up, _I’ll_ shut you up!”

“Kid, _no!_ ”

Before Linkara could do the unthinkable, the rock was snatched from his hand and he was pushed to the ground by Ninja. *Excuse this sudden rudeness, but I thought it best to be rude instead of allowing you to suffer a concussion. Or worse.* 

“Kid, are you crazy?!” Harvey and the others quickly rushed to his side. “What were you thinking?”

“I just...w-wanted it to be quiet...” Linkara muttered, the color slowly draining from his face. The air seemed to grow colder and the sky darker, and Harvey wasted no time in wrapping his coat around Linkara’s body before he began to shake. 

“Kid, please,” Harvey begged, his eyes filled with desperation. “No grail is worth this. Nothing is worth this. Please, let’s get out of this forest and come up with a plan to beat this trial without anyone else getting hurt.”

“Okay,” Linkara relented, curling up under the jacket as he searched for warmth and relief. “W-whatever you want, Harvey...I trust you...I’m sorry...I’m s-sorry...90s K-Kid...sorry...”

“I know, Kid.” Harvey scooped the exhausted hero into his arms and made a hasty retreat back the way they’d came, the others following close behind.

\-----

Dan sat on his bare mattress, his sheets wrapped protectively around his body like a child huddling under the covers during a thunder storm. He was hugging Braveheart Lion close to his chest and watching the _Freak Force #1_ review for what was probably the tenth time in a row. He had been like that all day, not exiting his room except for excursions to the bathroom, a half-empty pizza box sitting next to him in a small, greasy puddle. Dan had promised 90s Kid that he would eat while he was away, and while Dan was sure 90s Kid had meant for his meals to consist of something healthier than pizza, he couldn’t help it; pizza was 90s Kid’s favorite food, so that was what he craved. 

The video ended and Dan reached for his cell phone, pushing a button to call his voicemail. 

“Hey, Dan! It’s totally me, dude! I’m just letting you know that I might be late for our date and stuff, cuz Harvey-dude wanted me to help him with his, like, fifty-billion trade evolutions-”

“Hey, the Kid was busy and I offered you extra allowance-er, salary money!”

“Whatever. Anyway, I’ll totally be there soon! Meet me in the usual spot, alright? I love you!”

Afterwards came the mechanical woman’s voice to let him know that he had listened to all his messages, and Dan sighed softly. He closed his eyes and pushed the button to repeat the message, trying to soak in 90s Kid’s voice as much as he could.

Dan flinched at the sudden knock on his door and pulled the sheets more tightly around his body. 

“Hey Dan,” Dolly called out when he refused to answer. “The Crabtrees are coming over to drink and watch The Gate with me and ROB. Come down and join us.” Dan didn’t answer, instead pushing the phone closer to his ear so he could make out the teen’s voice more easily. 

“Dan, come on,” Dolly called out, sounding exasperated now. “No one has seen you in almost a month. You can’t just stay holed up in your room all day, it isn’t healthy. You haven’t been outside for weeks, not even to go to your meetings. Don’t you think that’s kind of a bad idea?” Again Dan ignored her as he picked up a cold pizza crust and began nibbling on it while 90s Kid again apologized for being late to their date. 

“You shouldn’t be doing this,” Dolly insisted. “You should be out here, explaining why this terrible movie is actually awesome and laughing at all the unfunny moments that make us cringe. That’s where you belong, Dan.”

“The only place I belong is wherever Kid is,” Dan thought, swallowing his crust and clutching Braveheart even tighter to his chest. 

Dolly sighed, exasperated by Dan’s refusal to answer. “Dan, do you really think this is what 90s Kid would want you to be doing? Just shutting yourself away from the world and pretending nothing else exists but your own pain?”

A small pang of anger flared up inside Dan when Dolly dared to invoke 90s Kid’s desires. She didn’t know 90s Kid at all, didn’t know what he felt or thought. What right did she have to say that in 90s Kid’s name?

After another few moments of silence, Dolly finally sighed loudly. “Okay, fine, I give up. No one can say I didn’t try.”

Dan waited until her footsteps disappeared down the stairs before he clicked on the _Ravage 2099 #1_ review, smiling widely when he saw his boyfriend arrive home from the future. Home. Would there ever be a day when 90s Kid came home to him again?

A loud dinging sound alerted Dan to the fact that he had email. Without even bothering to check who the sender was, Dan deleted it and returned to his video. He already knew it was either Boffo or Ted trying to contact him again. They were always trying to contact him, but they never had any news on 90s Kid, and if they did have news, it most likely wouldn’t be good anyway. Dan didn’t need the stress of worrying about the potential bad news they might provide him with, so it was best to limit contact with them. 90s Kid would want him to stay calm, after all.

Dan’s fingers reached down and started stroking the ring on his finger, one of his biggest sources of comfort, if not the only one, during this difficult time. 90s Kid had given him something so special, a true representation of his love and commitment to him. Even after 90s Kid’s speech on their anniversary, Dan continued to be plagued with insecure doubts about how serious 90s Kid actually was about him, but now this proved it. 90s Kid was going to marry him. 90s Kid really would carry him over the threshold as his husband one day. He smiled as he listened to 90s Kid chatter on about the future, squeezing Braveheart tightly, and for a long, happy moment, he was 90s Kid’s husband. 

Then fear flashed through his brain like a brooding, fluttering bat. What if 90s Kid wouldn’t be able to marry him? What if he and the team were still fighting next week, or next month, or next year? What if what felt like seconds to them were months in Dan’s time? What if...what if 90s Kid didn’t come home because- 

“No.” Dan whispered aloud, squeezing his eyes shut and forcing those thoughts to go away. “That’s not going to happen. He must come back. He has to come back.”

As Dan chanted this mantra several more times, he started scratching at a strange itch plaguing his neck and throat. It was strange because it was an itch that only seemed to appear when his concern for 90s Kid grew to alarming levels and didn’t end even if Dan scratched at it for half an hour. Dan knew his skin was growing red and blotchy thanks to his bizarre itch, but he couldn’t bring himself to care much about it. He didn’t care about much of anything anymore, other than 90s Kid. And cocaine. Some cocaine would be really refreshing right about now...

Dan bit down on his tongue to stop that train of thought and rolled over onto his side, pulling the sheets up over his head. He didn’t need that. He didn’t need drugs. He needed 90s Kid. Not drugs. No. No drugs. 90s Kid. Drugs. Dan closed his eyes. Drugs. 90s Kid. Drugs. No. No...


	8. Chapter 8

Harvey looked down worriedly at Linkara, who was still wrapped in his jacket and resting in his arms. They had made it back inside the castle without any trouble and were taking refuge at the moment inside the throne room, which, along with the rest of the building, seemed deserted and covered with cobwebs. It wasn’t the most desirable place to spend time, but it was warm and relatively safe compared to those dense woods, so the team had deemed it safe enough.

Linkara had thankfully managed to fall asleep, but Harvey could tell from the way his face and eyes kept twitching that the voices in his head hadn’t quieted down much at all. His breathing was labored and his brow kept beading with sweat, and Harvey struggled to think of what he could do to ease his pain. The trials that this mission had forced them to endure had affected each of them harder than they’d like to admit, but Linkara was the one undoubtedly suffering for the longest amount of time and there seemed to be no end in sight to the voices’ persistent badgering. 

Harvey shivered as he thought of what those voices had driven Linkara to do. Harvey had never seen his boyfriend so angry; watching him and 90s Kid try to tear each other to shreds was not something that he’d ever want to see again. Harvey cursed himself for not handling the aftermath of the fight better. While he had been furious at Linkara for striking 90s Kid, he should have forced himself to remember just how greatly Linkara was suffering at that time as well. Enough to run through those woods by himself and almost…

Harvey snapped his eyes shut and forced those thoughts away. No, there was no need to dwell on that anymore. What had happened, had happened, but from now on he would do better to ensure that no one else he cared for came to such a dire decision again.

Across the room, Ninja and Linksano were lying down silently in their sleeping bags, Linksano constantly tossing and turning as he tried to sleep, while Ninja laid still and kept staring at the castle ceiling. 90s Kid was curled up closer to Harvey, close enough that Harvey turned his head towards him when he heard 90s Kid start to moan softly. 

“Junior?” he murmured, leaning over to take a closer look. 90s Kid’s face was white and he was trembling, so Harvey shook him a bit until the teen sat up with a gasp, looking around wildly. His expression changed to bewilderment, then grew forlorn, before he lay back down, dejected. “Bad dream?” Harvey asked softly.

90s Kid nodded. “I thought I was back home, b-but it turned out that everything was way in the future and stuff,” he said in a voice still thick with sleep. “It had only been, like, a day to us in here, but out there it was so much longer and n-nobody was there, and-” 90s Kid stopped abruptly, his trembling returning. Harvey’s eyes filled with concern and he ran his fingers through 90s Kid’s damp hair. 

“It’s alright, Junior. Nobody’s gone. We’ll get home soon and it’s gonna be just like we left it,” Harvey tried to reassure him.

“I hope so...” 90s Kid said quietly. “I really miss them.” Harvey stroked his hand along 90s Kid’s cheek softly, his heart aching as he saw all the injuries that he’d acquired. 90s Kid had a black eye, a few scratches on his cheeks, and even several bruise marks forming along his neck. “It doesn’t hurt that bad,” 90s Kid said in what he hoped was a brave tone, seeming to read Harvey’s thoughts. “Linkara-dude probably hurts worse right now.”

Harvey nodded, looking again to the man he held against his chest. “I just hope we can figure out a way to make things better after he wakes up.” Harvey looked down when he saw that 90s Kid had moved and was now resting his head on his thigh. 

“I know. I hope we do too, since I need to tell him how sorry I am when he’s back to normal.”

Harvey gave a small smile and rubbed 90s Kid’s hair again. “I know, Junior.” He continued the motion until 90s Kid fell back asleep and gave a long sigh. Harvey was exhausted, but he didn’t think he could sleep right then. This had been undoubtedly the most stressful mission they’d ever endured, and he wanted to keep watch to ensure that his family would be safe for the moment. He didn’t know anything about how Boffo and Dan and Ted were faring, but he knew that the team was at least still together and in one piece. That was something to be thankful for, but even so, his insides continued to writhe with worry. 

Once Linkara’s trial was complete, they still had two more to go. 90s Kid was going to have to pass his somehow, and Harvey just prayed it wouldn’t be as traumatic as any of the others had been. He didn’t know what he would do if his boy lost the smile that kept him going after all that he’d been through. But then there was his own trial to consider as well. Would Harvey be able to handle whatever horrors this place threw at him? What if something happened to him? He was an old man; he didn’t have the youth and energy of the others. What if the trial required everything the singer had left? Then what? Who would look after his family if he were gone? 

Linkara shifted a little and Harvey forced himself to stop thinking. Even after everything that happened, he still trusted Linkara, and the others. They would find a way, somehow, with or without him. But as long as he was there, Harvey wasn’t going to let anything happen to himself or his family without a fight. Once they could complete the mission and return home, everything would be right again. Harvey vowed to return them home safely, and he didn’t break his vows lightly.

\-----

After the long night finally came to an end, the sun shone in through a window, landing on Linkara’s face and gently urging him to rise once more. Linkara opened his bloodshot eyes and felt as if he’d barely slept for more than a few hours, which was close to the truth, since the voices had continuously woken him up throughout the night. He groaned softly and with reluctance pushed Harvey’s arms away from him so that he could sit up. Linkara could tell that the others had not gotten much rest either that night, so he tried to move as quietly as possible as he pulled out a bottle of water and some granola bars for breakfast. 

The voices seemed to have quieted somewhat, so Linkara was planning to eat up, re-read the scroll for any hidden clues he might have missed yesterday, and then set out to finish the trial before any of the others awoke. Letting them have some more time to recover was the least he could do after his actions had led to that shameful encounter with 90s Kid yesterday. Linkara still felt guilty about losing control of himself and attacking the teenager, which was why he wanted to complete the trial and leave the voices behind as soon as he could before he did anything else he regretted. 

Unfortunately, the voices seemed to sense that this was Linkara’s plan; for their cries grew increasingly louder and shriller the second Linkara unfurled the silver piece of paper. 

_“The Grail! The Grail! Find it! Find it!”_

“Ahhh, shut up,” Linkara groaned softly, rubbing at the sides of his head as he tried and failed yet again to soften the screams inside his skull. 

“Kid? You okay?” Linkara sighed in annoyance when he saw Harvey and Ninja sit up, but he nodded at them. 

“Y-yeah, fine. I’m just g-getting ready for the day.”

*Were you thinking of attempting to complete the trial without us?* Ninja asked, showing off his knack for being able to figure out a person’s true intentions in mere seconds. 

“Yes,” Linkara said, already too exhausted by the voices to attempt lying. “I just thought if I g-got an early start...ow...that I m-might be more successful.”

“Oh no you don’t,” Harvey said in a firm tone, standing up as well. “You’re not doing anything without me.”

*Or me.* 

“Or me, dude.” 90s Kid and Linksano also seemed to be awake now, so Linkara shrugged and leaned against the castle wall in defeat. 

“Fine. You can c-come. Just…ow...just get some breakfast first.” Once everyone had eaten and stowed away their belongings, the team set off through the castle, which seemed much less impressive than it had the day prior. “I d-don’t know what I’m going to do,” Linkara admitted as they trudged through dreary room after dreary room. “The voices keep t-telling me to find the Grail, but there’s no damn way I can do that without any c-clues.”

“Perhaps the words you’ve been hearing for the past twenty-four hours are not the ones you are meant to follow,” Linksano softly said, which earned a confused look from Linkara. 

“W-what? But the scroll said...ow...you know, you read it...so it has to m-mean to follow the voices. What other words c-could lead me on the path of a hero?”

“Hey, who’s that?” Harvey pointed ahead to what seemed to be a grand dining room filled with very long, wooden tables. At the end of one such table sat a young boy who was happily munching on mushrooms from a straw basket placed in front of him.

Linkara had been so distracted by the voices that he hadn’t even noticed him. _“Ignore the boy!”_ The voices screamed into his ear. _“He will not lead you down the true path! Leave him be!”_

Linkara growled and clutched at his head again. “No! Shut up, shut up!” The boy looked up at them and tilted his head in confusion, then shrugged and continued eating his mushrooms. 

*Do you think it might be a trap?* Ninja asked, eyeing the child suspiciously. *I don’t remember seeing him before. Who is he and how did he get in here?* 

“You think that everything could be a trap,” Linksano remarked dryly, though it was a good sign that his sarcasm seemed to be returning.

Ninja frowned at him. *So you believe that just because he’s a child, he’s completely harmless?*

“How should I know? I know nearly nothing about children, that’s more-” Linksano stopped before he could mention Boffo’s name, swallowing the rest of his words uneasily.

“I say we go talk to him,” 90s Kid piped up. “I mean, it’s just a kid, y’know? He’s probably not a trap. Maybe he, like, lives here and knows where to find stuff? We could ask him about the Holy Grail then.”

Harvey nodded. “I agree. The little tyke looks harmless enough. Why don’t we try asking him about this place?” Linksano seemed to assent to this plan and Ninja didn’t protest, so they all turned to Linkara to see what he thought. 

_“Do not talk to the boy!”_ The voices howled. _“Certain doom will befall you!”_

Linkara took a breath and placed his hand on Harvey’s arm to steady himself, before he nodded. “I’ll t-trust you guys on this. Let’s g-go talk to him.” The voices only got louder, but Linkara stubbornly tried to ignore them as best he could. 

Once they got close to where the boy sat, Linkara paused before Harvey gently urged him forward. “Go talk to him, Kid.”

“I’m not quite sure w-what to say.”

90s Kid shrugged. “Ask if what he’s eating is good?”

At any other point, Linkara would’ve scoffed at that suggestion, but since his brain was so distressed by the painful yammering of a thousand or so voices, he could come up with nothing better. The boy looked at Linkara as he stepped forward and continued munching away calmly. “Um, h-hi there. W-what are you eating? Is it good?” Linkara asked, pointing to the basket. 

The boy nodded. “Yes, sir. Would you like one, sir?” He offered the basket to Linkara, who gasped when he was finally able to view the mushrooms up close. 

“No! I d-don’t! And y-you shouldn’t either! How m-many of them have you had?!”

“You’re frightening me, sir,” the child said, shrinking down and away from the angry comic reviewer. He still held a few mushrooms in his hand, but after a swat from Linkara he dropped them onto the floor where they where they were quickly stomped into mush by Linkara’s sneaker. 

“Kid, what are you doing?” Harvey asked in horror as he rushed over to the now trembling boy. 

“I-I was trying to...ow...to stop him b-but I think it’s too late...”

_“Stop! You must leave! Leave the boy! Leave leave leave!”_

“I said shut up!” Linkara cried, his efforts to quiet the voices growing weaker. 

*Linkara is correct to be worried.* Ninja held up one of the mushrooms from the basket with the tips of his fingers. *These are highly poisonous and if ingested, can kill within minutes.* 

“What? Oh no...” 90s Kid and Linksano looked in horror toward the boy, who had by now buried his face in Harvey’s jacket while the singer tried to soothe him.

“What are we gonna do, Kid? We gotta save the tyke!”

“I know, b-but how am I supposed to do that? Shouldn’t Linksano be the one you ask for help?”

“I cannot.” Linkara looked to Linksano in surprise, but the scientist was staring back at him solemnly. “I didn’t bring the supplies necessary to create an antidote for this type of poisoning. I’m sorry, Linkara.”

“Kid, please, you gotta do something.” Harvey’s expression was desperate, and that hurt worse than the voices which now screamed inside Linkara’s head. 

“What about your magic spells, dude?” Linkara turned to 90s Kid in surprise. “There are spells that can, like, heal a person from being sick and hurt, right? Can’t you use one?”

“I...well I do know of a f-few spells, b-but I’ve never tried them out, since Linksano’s always b-been around to help instead.” That was mostly the reason, although a small part of Linkara also worried that he would not be able to cast such powerful spells at his magic level. 

“Please, Kid, try it,” Harvey begged. The boy started to cough just then, and everyone was horrified to see blood mottle his chin. Harvey pulled out a handkerchief and started wiping it up, looking as though he were on the verge of losing his mind, though trying very hard to keep in control as he rubbed the boy’s back to try and soothe his coughs. 

“Linkara, we don’t have another option. You have to perform a spell,” Linksano told him, wishing that there was anything he could do for the struggling boy. 

*We are running out of time. If we do not do something fast, we will lose him.* 

“Linkara-dude, please! I know you can do it, dude, just try it!”

_“Do not heal the boy! He will destroy you all! You will fail this trial! You will fail at everything! DO NOT HELP HIM!”_

The voices continued to shriek, but Linkara closed his eyes and placed a hand on the boy’s forehead. 

Everyone was silent as Linkara began to speak indecipherable words, words that seemed to grow in power the more he spoke; he trembled a little as he fought to keep his voice steady through the sea of howls and shrieks that filled his ears and threatened to make him faint. The boy closed his eyes as well and his skin started to glow; before long, the blood spewing from his mouth vanished and his coughing stopped just as Linkara finished uttering the last word of the sacred chant. 

“I...I feel better,” the boy murmured, and everyone breathed a sigh of relief, Harvey loudest of all. The boy smiled at Linkara, who was still struggling to hold himself upright, and with some effort Linkara smiled back. 

“I’m glad I was able to help,” Linkara told him. “B-by the way, you never told us...who are you?”

“My name is Arthur, sir.”

“Arthur...” Linkara’s eyes went wide. “You don’t m-mean...”

The boy giggled and reached out to touch Linkara’s forehead this time, and his body began glowing once again. There was a brilliant flash of golden light which completely filled the area, and when it faded, the boy, the castle, and the silver scroll had all disappeared, replaced with an extremely familiar white hallway. Linkara was lying in the middle of the shining alabaster floor, unmoving. 

“Kid!” Harvey knelt down and began shaking him. “Kid! Linkara! Say something, please!” he begged, while the others waited breathlessly for any response. 

Linkara slowly opened his eyes and lifted his arm to touch where Arthur had placed his hand. “The v-voices...they’re gone,” he whispered, his lips curving upwards with relief. “I only wish...he would have...granted me a knighthood...”

Harvey couldn’t help chuckling while Ninja helped both of them to their feet. “I’m glad to see you’re back to your old self, Kid,” he half-joked, looking extremely relieved.

“Are you experiencing any other pain, Linkara?” Linksano asked as he held up his medical bag. “Would you like me to examine you?”

Linkara shook his head and leaned against Harvey, breathing in deeply as he savored the silence inside his mind. “That’s okay, Linksano. I think now that we’re out of that place, I’m going to be fine.”

“I’m glad to hear it, Kid,” Harvey said as he wrapped his arms around the younger man and kissed him gently. “Thank the Lord we’re out of there. I don’t know how much longer I could have taken seeing you like that.” Harvey wiped his now spotless handkerchief against his forehead and started to breathe easy for the first time since Linkara had been afflicted with those voices. 

Even as relief flooded him, a small pool of worry settled in his stomach, because there were still two trials to go: his and 90s Kid’s. Harvey didn’t know which one he was more worried about, nor which one he wanted to experience first, but he knew there was no stopping now, not after the others had already suffered for the sake of acquiring this weapon. Harvey could not let them down, so he pocketed his handkerchief, took Linkara’s hand, and squeezed it gently. “I think I’m ready to get going, Kid. How about you?” He directed this question to 90s Kid, who met his gaze with an expression of nervousness mixed with determination. 

“I’m ready, Harvey-dude. I don’t know what’s coming next, but if everyone else can do it, then I can too.”

Harvey smiled with pride at the teen. “You’re a brave man, Junior. I always knew I could count on you when the going gets rough.”

90s Kid blushed happily at his words before he turned to Linkara. “Listen, Linkara-dude: I know I let you down before and I’m really sorry about that. I know I got totally crazy about everything but I promise I’m gonna be different now and I’m totally gonna show you that I’m a true part of this team. So let’s do this thing and get this weapon and save everyone, like we always do.”

Linkara also managed to show 90s Kid a proud smile. “I accept your apology, 90s Kid. I also want to thank you for always offering me advice, even when I’m too stubborn to listen to it right away. If I’d listened to you or Harvey or anyone else in the first place, we might not have gotten stuck in that trial for so long, so I also want to apologize to all of you,” Linkara finished, turning to each member of his team in kind. “I know that there are times when I’m so wrapped up in my own head that I don’t listen to what others are trying to tell me. I always think I know what’s best and I can be a real jerk about doing things my way. I know this and I promise that I’m going to try to be better. I’ll really listen to what you’re telling me and I’ll stop being so dismissive of your words, no matter how much I don’t agree with them, because hey, I’ve been wrong before.”

“Lots of times,” Harvey agreed.

“Tons of times!” 90s Kid cried.

“So very many times,” Linksano chimed in.

“Okay, I think we can all agree that I’ve been wrong a lot!” Linkara pretended to glare when everyone around him started to laugh, before he chuckled along as well.

*It is accepted, Linkara. These trials are designed to target our weaknesses, it seems, so we can hardly blame you for succumbing to them* Ninja replied.

“Just like the rest of us ain’t blaming you for succumbing to yours,” Harvey added, looking directly at Ninja. “No one here blames you at all.” he repeated softly. Ninja glanced down, unable to respond, but appreciating those words all the same.

“Well, then, let’s not waste any time.” Linkara said as he adjusted his hat. Linksano noticed the bandages still covering his leader’s hands and lifted his medical bag once again.

“Linkara, before we proceed, wouldn’t it be best if you applied some of Ninja’s healing balm to your hands, face, and chest?”

“My hands and face, yes,” Linkara agreed as he started peeling off the bloodied strips from around his fingers. “But my chest is fine as it is.”

Linksano looked confused as the other man began rubbing the lotion into his wounds. “How can you say that when it’s covered with indentations of 90s Kid’s fists?”

90s Kid looked down guiltily but Linkara was quick to respond. “It’s covered with a reminder to always use my words instead of my fists to solve problems. I think I’ll let that reminder sink in a little longer.”

Once Linkara had restored most of his body to its previous condition, 90s Kid approached Linksano. “Can I use that too?”

“Of course.” Linksano watched as 90s Kid healed his chest and cheeks, but frowned when the teen ignored his black eye. “Do you need to be reminded of something as well, 90s Kid?”

“Yep. That a real hero never turns on his friends, no matter what.” 90s Kid and Linkara shared a look and nodded to each other in understanding. They would never let a fight escalate to that degree again.

“And you couldn’t just, I don’t know, write that on a sticky note instead of leaving your vision temporarily impaired?” Linksano snidely remarked.

90s Kid laughed and patted Linksano’s shoulder. “Thanks for always worrying about me, dude. If I need to see better for my trial, I’ll totally come back for more of this junk, but for now I’m cool.”

Linksano seemed a bit surprised by 90s Kid’s words, before he smiled and tidied up his bag once more. “Alright, I can say in good conscience that we are all in decent enough physical condition to continue.”

“Thanks, Linksano.” Linkara said as he took his place at the front of the group again. “The sooner we find this damned weapon, the sooner we can get home, and nothing sounds better than that right now, so come on guys. Follow me.”

His head clear and his heart strong once more, Linkara led his team down the white hallway in search of the door which would bring them one step closer to making his words reality.


	9. Chapter 9

After a little time spent searching, it was 90s Kid who next caught sight of flickering golden letters above one of the doors.

_MIMBULUS MIMBLETONIA_

90s Kid recognized the words immediately from his favorite book series and turned toward the others. “Dudes, over here!”

Harvey felt his stomach churn as he realized that this next trial would be for 90s Kid, but he tried to look as calm and collected as always while they arranged themselves into position. After Linkara had opened the door and declared it safe, he entered inside right behind 90s Kid, watching him closely for signs of unease. 90s Kid soon felt eyes on the back of his neck, and he glanced behind him to smile at Harvey. 

“Don’t worry, dude. I totally got this.”

Harvey tried to smile back and come up with something funny to say to soothe his nerves, before he was distracted by the setting around them. “Huh.”

Most of the team looked at their surroundings in puzzlement. They seemed to be standing atop a grassy field with white lines painted across the center akin to those found on a soccer field. However, instead of standing inside a stadium, the five were surrounded by a circle of tall towers bearing flags. At either end of the field stood three very tall poles of varying heights with hoops at the ends. “What the heck kind of stadium is this?” Harvey muttered, thinking back to his childhood days of playing football after school. 

“I don’t know, I never played sports.” Linkara admitted. 

“Ditto,” Linksano muttered as memories of past gym classes caused him to shudder. 

*It’s certainly not a place I’ve seen before* Ninja admitted. 

The only one who didn’t look confused was 90s Kid, who was staring at a row of broomsticks resting neatly off to the side of the field. “I think I know.” 90s Kid walked over to the brooms, selected one, and straddled his legs over the handle. Harvey winced at the sight.

“Geez, Junior, doesn’t that smart?”

90s Kid shook his head. “Nope. It feels like I’m sitting on a cushion. It’s just like I always imagined it would feel like.” After gripping the handle tightly, 90s Kid bent his knees before pushing up and off the ground. To everyone’s surprise, 90s Kid started to whiz through the air as if he had been born to fly. “Whoa!” 90s Kid cried, his body flooding with excitement. Flying on a broomstick had been something he’d dreamt of doing ever since he’d started reading the Harry Potter series; now that it was actually happening, the joy 90s Kid felt was almost indescribable. He felt so much lighter and faster, and for a few shining moments he was 90s Kid, Weapons Expert for the Earth’s Champion and Captain of the Quidditch Team. 

“Wowie,” Harvey murmured as he watched 90s Kid move with ease through the air. “Junior’s really one smooth cat.” Even though he was impressed, he could already feel the pit of dread forming in his stomach. Harvey was not keen to see what sort of challenge required 90s Kid to fly through the air like this.

“Alright, let’s get to it,” Linkara called as he began straddling a broom of his own. 

“Y-you mean we all have to ride those flimsy cleaning materials?” Linksano asked, looking pale. 

“Don’t worry, dude, it’s totally easy,” 90s Kid said as he swooped back down to the ground to assist the others. 

“Whoa...okay...huh, yeah this is easy,” Linkara said, smiling after he started getting the hang of flying himself. “Now come on, we need to start looking for that scroll. It’s gotta be around here somewhere, so everyone get into the air and start searching!”

The team obeyed and took to the skies; though for the first few minutes most of them were too preoccupied with not falling off their brooms to actually look for the scroll. 90s Kid was having the time of his life as he soared through the sky, wishing that he were actually playing a game of Quidditch with his friends. “Isn’t this awesome, dudes?” he cried as he circled around them with ease. 

*It is not unenjoyable* Ninja admitted, having picked up on flying in a relatively short manner. 

“No, it’s worse than unenjoyable! It is-ack!” Linksano was clinging to his broomstick with all of his might and looking as if he might fall off at any moment. “It is intolerable!”

“Come on, Linksano, it’s not that bad,” Linkara said, flying over to him to make sure he didn’t actually fall. “Compared to what we’ve been through, this is almost fun.” Linksano was not inclined to agree that any part of this activity was fun, so he kept his mouth shut and his eyes at a squint as he searched for any flash of silver. 

Harvey, who was keeping as close to the ground as he could, seemed to be doing okay, though he couldn’t help glancing to 90s Kid every few moments, waiting for the other shoe to drop. During one such glance, he spotted something shining at the very top of the tallest hoop. “Kid, Junior, over there!” he shouted, pointing toward the object. 

90s Kid instantly zoomed toward the scroll, snatching it up with ease, and took a deep breath before he unrolled it. He knew that this task was meant for him, so he had to be ready for whatever this piece of parchment said. 

“Words Can Wound. Obey The Words: Avoid the Obstacles Which Fill the Skies; Catch the Snitch: Do Not Tell Lies.” Below the words were five checkmarks, similar to those found on the scroll Linkara had read. 

“What’s it say?” Linkara and Ninja quickly arrived at 90s Kid’s side, reading the message as well.

“Do not tell lies?” Linkara wondered. “What does that mean?”

90s Kid’s brow furrowed as he looked down at the scroll, knowing that the message reminded him of something, but he couldn’t quite remember what. Before he had time to think about it, though, he saw several jet black Bludgers, which were balls made of iron, zooming towards them at breakneck speed. “Everybody scatter!” he yelled, and Linkara and Ninja obeyed instantly, all three now flying toward the ground.

“Honestly, you all flew away just as I made it over there!” Linksano griped, turning his broom around reluctantly. 

“Dude, we got more important things to worry about right now! Look out for the Bludgers!”

“The what now?”

“The giant black balls flying towards us!” 90s Kid yelled, still thinking that they were coming towards them a little too fast. 

*I do not see anything* Ninja held up, before almost dropping his card when he heard 90s Kid yell in pain as a Bludger struck his arm. 

_“IDIOT!”_ A voice, furious and dripping with disdain, exploded into 90s Kid’s brain like a lightning bolt. He let go of his broom for a moment and covered his ears. “What...dude, w-who said that-ow!” Another Bludger struck him square in the back, and the same voice screamed _“WORTHLESS!”_

“Shut up!” 90s Kid yelled, shaking his head to get his ears to stop ringing. “Whoever it is, stop it!”

“Oh God,” Linkara murmured, knowing all too well what 90s Kid must be going through at the moment. “Quick, fly to 90s Kid and shield him!” Everyone flew directly toward the teen, even Harvey, who refused to let his fear of flying stop him from rising up to where the others were. 90s Kid tried to smile gratefully at him, but just then a Bludger slammed into the back of his neck. _“ANNOYING!”_

“Ow! They’re coming too fast, dudes-oww! Argh!” 90s Kid felt two of them strike his stomach in quick succession, punctuated with shrieks of _“COWARD!”_ and _“WEAKLING!”_

“Where are these things coming from?!” Harvey demanded. It was just as he’d feared. 90s Kid was being attacked by something they could not see or block, and he seemed to be getting knocked cross-eyed by them. 

“Owww!” 90s Kid cried as one Bludger hit him in the side hard enough to topple him off his broom. _“CRYBABY!”_ 90s Kid shot his arms up and managed to grab onto the wooden handle with his fingertips, leaving him dangling several hundred feet above the ground.

“Junior!” Harvey shouted, watching in horror as 90s Kid struggled to hold on while dozens of Bludgers slammed into his body, trying their best to weaken his grip.

“Help!” 90s Kid cried out, his terror and the pain from those Bludgers causing his spirit to diminish, and before he realized it, he had released his hold from the handle and was plummeting.

 _“…A dive from the sky…”_ For some reason, these words echoed through 90s Kid’s mind as he fell, and even now, as he was on the verge of smashing into the cold ground, he shuddered and could think of nothing more terrifying than that woman he had Harvey had met on one memorable road trip.

“Ninja! Go left!” Before 90s Kid could complete his descent, his arms were grabbed by Linkara, while his legs were grabbed by Ninja. “Now fly up, quickly!” Linkara and Ninja used every bit of effort they had to steer their brooms away from the ground, successfully rescuing 90s Kid from certain doom. Once they were back in the air flying at a slower speed, Ninja stood up, balancing precariously on the handle of his broom, and lifted 90s Kid up from Linkara’s grasp.

“Whoa!”

*Hold still. Linksano is almost here with your broom.* 

“I’m…huff huff…I’m here.” Linksano slowly glided over to them and held out 90s Kid’s broom, allowing Ninja to plop him back onto it without trouble. 90s Kid hugged the handle tightly as he panted and rubbed at the aching parts of his body while Ninja easily returned to a sitting position. 

“Th-thanks dudes,” he managed to say before gasping and ducking just before another Bludger could slam into his head. 

*You are being attacked again?* Ninja held up, looking around for any trace of the missiles that kept slamming into 90s Kid. Even with his heightened senses, he could not see, hear, or feel any disturbance in the air, and that made Ninja very unsettled. He would much rather face an attack instead of leaving it to 90s Kid, so he began circling around the teenager, never traveling further than five inches from him. Linkara nodded at him and turned to the others. 

“Everyone, follow Ninja’s lead! 90s Kid is the only one getting attacked, so if we keep close to him, maybe we can keep him protected until he finds this Snitch.”

“Which is what again, exactly?” Linksano asked as he flew up to begin circling 90s Kid as well. 

“It’s a small golden ball with wings,” 90s Kid said. He still felt those horrible, insulting words ringing in his ears, but he refused to stop before he had completed his trial. If the others could make it through some really terrible things, then 90s Kid could put up with a little name-calling. 

“Y-you sure you okay, Junior?” Harvey, looking positively green and refusing to face the ground, reached a shaky hand out to touch 90s Kid’s shoulder. 90s Kid nodded. 

“I’m okay, dude. Thanks for protecting me-whoa, look out!” 90s Kid gripped Harvey’s shoulders and tried to pull him to the left, out of the path of a Bludger, but it still slammed against the singer’s shoulder. “I’m sorry!” 90s Kid cried, but to his surprise Harvey didn’t react at all. 

“Sorry about what?”

“You didn’t feel that, Harvey-dude?”

Harvey looked confused. “All I feel is this horrible churning in my stomach from being up this high,” he admitted. 

“So you dudes can’t feel them either,” 90s Kid murmured. 

*That is precisely why I want to keep close to you* Ninja told him. *If we encircle you like this, I think we will all be safe from whatever is attacking you.* 

90s Kid flashed them all a grateful smile. “Thanks a ton, everyone. I promise I’ll catch the Snitch totally fast, for sure!”

As the others flew in protective formation around him, 90s Kid started looking around to see if he could spot a glimmer of gold flittering through the sky. He moved his sunglasses to the bridge of his nose and squinted to see better, and before long, he saw it zooming around. “Guys! Over there! I’m going after it!” he yelled before skyrocketing upwards. 

Linkara and Ninja took off after him as fast as they could go, Linksano and Harvey trailing along a bit shakily, when 90s Kid saw the Bludgers coming for him again. He stretched his arm out as far as he could, almost managing to close his fingers around the Snitch, when a Bludger to the leg knocked him off-balance. _“FAILURE!”_

“Grrr! I said shut up!” 90s Kid yelled and took a sharp turn to the right, speeding directly after the Snitch once more.

“90s Kid, we’re not gonna catch you if you keep going that fast!” Linkara yelled to him, but 90s Kid didn’t care. He wanted those voices to stop as soon as possible, so he was going to catch this Snitch if it was the last thing he did to help the team.

“Gahhh! Ohhh...” 90s Kid clutched at his stomach as one Bludger pummeled him in the gut, struggling to contain his nausea as the voice screamed _“UNLOVEABLE!”_

“Gah...nngh...n-no…” 90s Kid panted, refusing to let himself be taken down by the pain. He urged himself to move forward and chased after the glittering golden ball again, reaching out his arm and struggling to outrace the Bludgers. “Almost...got it...” He grunted as his fingers just barely grazed the surface of the Snitch.

A Bludger slammed into the back of 90s Kid’s head, causing him to see stars for a moment. 

_“NOT EVEN YOUR PARENTS WANTED YOU!”_ echoed through the teen’s head, and tears sprung to his eyes, though he wasn’t sure if they had been caused by the words or the aching in his skull. However, that last jolt to his body had pushed him forward enough to allow 90s Kid’s fingers to wrap completely around the Snitch, which bounced eagerly against his palm. Before 90s Kid could reveal this to the others, however, he felt a strange sensation, like a hook was pulling him somewhere behind his navel, and then he vanished completely. 

“Junior!” Harvey and the others flew in a panic over to where 90s Kid had been and looked around wildly for him. 

“Does anyone see him?” Linkara cried, flying up higher to get a better vantage point. 

“H-he’s not anywhere that I can see,” Linksano said, adjusting several settings on his goggles in the hopes of locating any trace of 90s Kid. 

“Junior! Junior! Can you hear us?!” Harvey was barely managing to hang onto his broomstick by this point and he would have fallen off completely if the entire field didn’t suddenly vanish, along with their broomsticks. The four soon found themselves tumbling onto the stone floor of an older, larger castle than the one from Linkara’s trial, filled with many stairways, hallways, and doorways. 

*It seems we have entered a new location* Ninja commented after helping Harvey and Linksano to their feet.

“Thank the Lord for solid ground,” Harvey murmured, gripping onto the wall for dear life for a good minute. Linkara then offered his arm to the singer, and Harvey happily clung to him instead. “So, where do you think we are now?”

“If my deductions are correct, 90s Kid must have passed the first and second steps of the trial,” Linksano said. “I suspect that the last step he needs to follow will be completed somewhere in this building.”

“You mean the part about not telling lies?” Linkara asked. “What the hell does that even mean?”

*I don’t know, but I’m not sure finding out will be a pleasant experience* Ninja guessed. 

Harvey felt the worry in his stomach grow, but he shook his head and looked to Linkara. “Come on, Kid. We better find him as quick as we can.”

\-----

90s Kid coughed a bit as he picked himself up off an unfamiliar floor. What he had just experienced was completely unlike what using a teleporter was like, and he silently thanked Linksano for not making instantaneous transportation that nauseating. 90s Kid groaned as he felt the many bruises and aches all over his body, but he forced his eyes to focus. A strange fluttering sensation in his hand caused him to realize that he was still holding the Golden Snitch. 90s Kid stared down at in surprise, having expected it to dissolve along with the rest of the Quidditch Field, before he smiled and shoved it into his pocket. Once they were finished with these trials, he was definitely going to take a closer look.

90s Kid then remembered he was alone and in a completely different environment than before. “Where am I?” he murmured as he peered all around. He soon deduced that he was standing in some sort of classroom, but one which was quite unusual from normal classrooms. There were several desks in front of him, old, wooden desks big enough for two people which were connected to wooden bench seats, a small, portable chalkboard at the front of the room, and a small staircase which led to a small balcony right beside what was presumably the teacher’s desk.

It looked so very familiar and as 90s Kid walked through the room, he envisioned scenes of pixies flying all over the place, knocking over inkwells and upsetting candles. This was a room 90s Kid had thought about a lot, a room he’d also dreamt of visiting, where he could learn all about defeating dark creatures and magical spells.

90s Kid only stopped walking when he noticed a roll of parchment lying on one desk in the very front row of the classroom. It shone with a golden glow for a few seconds and 90s Kid knew it was what he’d been searching for. He sat down on the hard bench and saw that beside the scroll lay a long, thin black quill. 

90s Kid reached into his pocket for the scroll and unfurled it with hands that shook, reading it again slowly. “Do not tell lies...” he whispered, his heart beginning to race. Now he remembered what this meant. He had just finished The Order of the Phoenix a few days before Linkara had told them about this hellish mission…so this was his trial. 90s Kid urged himself to unroll the scroll, looking down at the blank parchment that seemed to stare back at him almost menacingly in its blankness. His fingers twitched as they moved towards the quill, but try as he might, he couldn’t bring himself to pick it up. 90s Kid whimpered and buried his face in his hands. 

_“No, no, this can’t be happening. What’s wrong with me? Everyone else was able to get through their trials. Why not me? Am...am I not as good as they are?”_ The vile, dark thoughts were still floating in his brain, taking him over. _“What...what if that voice was right? If I can’t do this, if I let everybody down...then I don’t deserve to be on this team...”_

90s Kid reached for the quill and his hand quivered as he remembered what the Bludgers had pounded into him. He had to do this. He must not tell lies.

“I am stupid,” he wrote across the parchment, a hiss escaping his lips as he felt his flesh start to sting. The very words he wrote were being cut into his hand, and the blood from the wounds was appearing in place of ink across the paper. “I am worthless,” he continued, tears coming to his eyes as he remembered every awful thing people had said to him, every time he had been told to go away, every time he had been ignored, even by people who were supposed to love him. 

“I am garbage,” he whimpered as he continued to write, knowing full well how it felt to be literally thrown away and forgotten about. “I c-can’t…can’t do this…” 90s Kid whispered, tears falling down his cheeks. His hand burned and he was afraid. “I am a coward,” he forced himself to write, not realizing how four of the checkmarks on the scroll had disappeared–now only one remained.

If 90s Kid sunk fully into despair, he would fail this trial and all of what he and the team had been through would have been for nothing. But before 90s Kid could write another word, an image of Dan’s face flashed across his mind. 

_“You’re amazing, Kid. You can do anything. I love you so much...you’re my hero...”_

“Dan.” 90s Kid felt a surge of warmth in his chest. He was doing this all for Dan; no, not just for Dan, but for Boffo and Ted and the team, and everyone else in the world. He could not lose his nerve now, not when they were so close to the end of this whole thing. “Dan, I’m gonna do it,” 90s Kid said, wiping his cheeks dry, his body flooding with renewed fear but also courage this time. He took a breath, picked up the quill, and poised it over the now blank sheet of parchment, as though his resolve had erased all the previous, awful thoughts. “I’m gonna tell the world the truth about me...the truth that you always saw, Dan.”

\-----

Outside in the maze-like hallways, the team was growing tired of walking, and in the case of Harvey, rather frantic about finding 90s Kid. “Come on, Junior,” he muttered as he peered into one empty room after another. “Give us some clue to where you are. Just one, that’s all I’m asking.”

Linkara rested a hand on Harvey’s shoulder. “We’ll find him, Harvey. This place is built to be confusing but I know we can figure it out.”

*Based on how the staircases never turn outwards, I think we can assume he is on the bottom floor. The hallways keep going in straight lines but there seems to be a pattern to the doors. We pass two closed doors on the left, then two closed on the right, followed by four open on both sides.* 

“I’d noticed that too,” Linksano noted. “The hallways also cross after every set of four open doors it seems...aside from that one.” He pointed to a hallway veering off to the left a few feet away from them. “Instead of appearing after four open doors, only two appear.”

“So we head down that one,” Harvey decided, making a beeline for said hallway. After only a few minutes, they found that it contained no doors save one at the very end, the one that Harvey quickly pushed open. “Junior! You in here?”

Harvey’s face lit up when he spotted the teen hunched down at one of the desks near the front of the room, and he hurried toward him before stopping dead in his tracks. What met Harvey’s eyes nearly made him scream and then made him sick to his stomach. 90s Kid was writing something, but the words weren’t black or made of ink; they were bright red and judging by the smell, composed of a substance not suitable for calligraphy. Harvey stared in horror at 90s Kid’s hands and arms, which were covered with words carved deep into his flesh and leaking blood. 

“Wh-what are you doing? Junior, stop!” Harvey tried to run forward, but was held back by Ninja-Style Dancer before he had the chance.

*We must not interfere, Harvey. You know this as well as anyone.* 

“Don’t give me that! He’s hurting himself!” Harvey yelled, gesturing to the puddles of blood that had formed underneath the desk. He continued to fight against Ninja’s grip, trying desperately to get to 90s Kid’s desk. “Junior! Junior, stop! Junior, please, try to hear me!”

“Harvey, we have to let 90s Kid continue, we don’t have any other choice,” Linkara said, though he also looked as though he were going to be sick. Harvey wouldn’t stop fighting though, so Linkara was forced to assist Ninja in holding Harvey back. “Harvey, please! Close your eyes if it helps, but you have to calm down!”

“I will be able to apply tourniquets and bandages once 90s Kid has completed the trial,” Linksano assured, though he was worried by the amount of blood 90s Kid was losing, counting down the amount of pints a human could lose and still live. “We just have to stay here and ensure that he remains conscious.” Linksano watched Harvey struggle warily, hoping that he wouldn’t have to sedate him too.

90s Kid, however, didn’t notice that anybody was in the room at all, since he was too busy writing the truth as quickly as he could, in spite of the pain that burned his skin with every stroke of the quill.

_“I am smart.” “I am worthy.” “I am brave.”_

Dan’s words continued to echo through 90s Kid’s mind, telling him what sentences he should write next. 

_“I am strong.” “I am kind.” “I am capable.” “I am worthy of love.” “I am wanted.” “I am needed.” “I am amazing.”_

90s Kid wrote and wrote even as his arms grew sore and his vision started to dim, but he refused to stop until at last he had filled every inch of the parchment with his own blood. 

“Please, please, make it stop, let it be over, please…” Harvey begged hoarsely, squeezing his eyes shut as he collapsed against Ninja and Linkara. Linkara pulled him into a hug and tried to murmur soothing words into his ear.

“I am 90s Kid!”

Once he finished writing the ‘d’ on this very last phrase, the parchment, quill, and the scroll in 90s Kid’s pocket vanished in a burst of golden light. 

“I...I did it...Dan…I did it.” 90s Kid managed a brief smile of triumph before he collapsed upon the desk, his head hitting the wood with a loud thunk. 

“Junior!” Harvey and Linkara rushed to his side while Linksano quickly rifled through his medical bag. 

“Quickly, Finevoice, Linkara, hold out his arms so I can apply the-” Linksano fell silent when in an instant the team was transported from inside the classroom to inside the familiar white hallway. 90s Kid, who was being supported up by Harvey and Linkara, started to stir and groan softly. 

“Oh...dude...did I do it?”

“I think so, 90s Kid. We’re back in the hallway so you must have passed,” Linkara informed him. 90s Kid felt his strength returning so he stood up on his own two feet before remembering what he’d done to his arms. He looked down and was surprised to find he was completely healed and not hurting one bit.

“Geez, Junior,” Harvey cried as he pulled the boy into a hug. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again! I lost ten years off my life after seeing you covered in all that-” Harvey couldn’t bring himself to say blood, but 90s Kid understood and he hugged the older man back. 

“Sorry, man. I didn’t mean to scare you. I just had to do what I had to do. I didn’t want let you guys down.” If he were being honest, 90s Kid actually had been worried that his trial would be much more painful than it had been. He felt that compared to the others, he’d gotten off easy.

Harvey took in a shuddering breath and squeezed 90s Kid tightly, feeling that his old, tired heart might break if it was forced to bear any more strain. He was being forced to watch the dearest people in his life suffer, and he knew that his own trial was coming up next, but that paled in comparison to his despair at the thought of almost losing 90s Kid. “I hope you don’t really think we don’t need you, 90s Kid,” Harvey murmured quietly into his ear. “Because I don’t think any of us could go on without you. I know I couldn’t…so please, be careful…don’t take life for granted…”

90s Kid gripped the back of Harvey’s jacket at these words, trying to keep in control of his emotions. If Harvey was dropping the nicknames, he must be serious. He should never have doubted how Harvey and the others felt about him. “I won’t, Harvey-dude, I promise. You be careful too.” The two slowly let go and 90s Kid turned to the others. 

Ninja was staring at 90s Kid with a mixture of pride, respect and admiration. Ever since he had met him, Ninja had viewed 90s Kid as little more than an overgrown child who was not suited for the cruelties of battle, but just now, the teen had proven that the virtues of courage, loyalty, and determination roared in his blood, just as they did in Ninja’s.

He noticed that 90s Kid was starting to fidget under his stare and he quickly held up a card. *I have seen many impressive feats in my time, 90s Kid, but I must say that was one of the bravest acts I’ve ever witnessed.* 90s Kid flushed bright red, almost unable to comprehend Ninja giving him so large a compliment. 

“Indeed, that was quite the marvel.” Linksano chimed in with an approving nod. “I do not know if I could have endured such pain for so long a period without cracking.”

90s Kid turned to Linkara, who was staring at him in a way that 90s Kid couldn’t quite place, but that he hoped was good. Finally, Linkara spoke quietly, holding his hand out for a shake. “I’m proud of you, 90s Kid.”

90s Kid paused before sliding his hand into Linkara’s and shaking gently. “Thanks, Linkara. Thanks all of you, really.”

“We’re truly grateful to have you with us,” Linkara said, a smile spreading across his face when 90s Kid started fidgeting happily. “So then,” he said, turning to address everyone. “Before we start looking for the next door, why don’t we take a quick rest here and have something to eat.” Linkara set his bags down onto the gleaming white floor and began pulling out a few of their food rations. “90s Kid especially should have something to make sure he recovers his strength fully and Linksano, I’d like you to check him for injuries just in case passing the trial didn’t heal them all. Since we don’t know what we’re going up against, we can’t be too careful.”

The others agreed and started to eat while Linkara brought a sandwich over to where Harvey was sitting. “You’d better eat up too,” he said in a soft voice. “I want you at full strength now. I...damn I wish I knew what it was you’d be facing.”

Harvey could hear the restrained fear in Linkara’s voice so he smiled and took the younger man’s hand. “Come on, Kid, I’m tougher than I look. I may be a bit more...let’s say mature than you cats, but that just means I’m more prepared to deal with whatever comes next. I can handle physical pain like a champ, so if it’s a task like the ones you or Junior faced, sure it’ll be annoying, but it won’t be impossible.”

“Yeah,” Linkara agreed, his voice growing even softer, “but what if it’s not a physical task? What if you’re put through something like Ninja and Linksano were? I know you’re strong and brave, Harvey, but...”

Harvey squeezed his hand, silencing him gently. “It’s alright, Kid. I know you’re worried and for good reason. Even I’m a little scared about what I might face,” he admitted. “But I’m not going to let you down after we’ve come this far, not after the suffering you and Junior and the others went through. I remember what we agreed to before we came here: the mission is the most important thing. We have to get this weapon before it falls into the wrong hands, and if that means I have to face something unpleasant, then so be it. I won’t be collateral damage, Kid, I swear.”

Harvey leaned in close and placed a gentle, reassuring kiss on Linkara’s lips, leaving them both feeling more determined than before. Harvey was right, and Linkara needed to put his worries aside. No matter what trial he faced, Harvey would be facing it with Linkara and the others at his side. Together, they would be able to overcome anything, because they were truly a team. 

“Eat up, Harvey,” Linkara instructed as he stood up. “I’m going to go check on 90s Kid.”

After everyone had rested and filled their stomachs, and after 90s Kid had been given a clean bill of health, the five made their way down the unearthly white hallway for what they all hoped would be the last time.


	10. Chapter 10

Boffo sighed as he flipped one of his playing cards, beating himself at yet another game of solitaire, before he looked around the base with a glum expression. The apartment was dim, quiet, and empty. Boffo had never been this depressed or lonely before within these walls, but it had been so long since Linksano and the others had left, and there had been no word from any of them. Boffo was really craving the smiling faces and enthusiastic voices found in each of his roommates. He missed 90s Kid’s shouting, Linkara’s narrating, Harvey’s singing, Linksano’s rambling; he would gladly listen to Linksano gripe over the coffee machine being too old and Linkara being too cheap to buy a new one if there was nothing else to hear. In those days of silence he found it impossible to sleep without the television on.

To make matters worse, Boffo was experiencing another rainy day where there was no clowning to be done. Normally Boffo took advantage of his days off by napping or reading or going on dates with Linksano, and sadly the third was impossible, but right now he desired human interaction. He had sent several texts and emails to Dan and Ted, but they were more likely not to respond, or respond at a much later date with an apology. Boffo knew that Dan was surrounded by friends and neighbors to look after him, and that Ted was busy with his new job, but he still wished he could spend more time with the two.

To Boffo’s surprise, a sudden knock on the front door distracted him from placing a queen on a king. He swiftly ran to the peephole, peered outside a moment, before throwing open the door and wrapping his arms tightly around the visitor.

_Ted! I was just thinking about you! It’s so good to see you!_

“Mmph! Oh, uh, greetings, Boffo-ack…” Ted managed to say before Boffo’s squeeze grew even tighter. Thank goodness last month’s injuries had healed or else he might need to pull out Ninja’s balm right that second. “Um, I-I am very happy to see you too. Can I come in…and breathe again, possibly?”

 _Of course! Please make yourself at home!_ Boffo honked as pulled Ted inside the base and eagerly led him to the couch where he sat down right beside Ted, looking quite excited. _How have you been? I haven’t talked with you in so long! I know you’ve been busy with your work teaching all those adorable children karate skills, so why don’t you tell me all about that! Or you could tell me about how much you admire Ninja! Or about your thoughts on the weather or proper fighting stances or the latest Kung-Fu movie you saw! Any topic is fine with me! I’m just so glad you’re here!_

Boffo pulled Ted into yet another hug, one that was perhaps even tighter than the first.

“Nnngh…ow…Ninja hadn’t told me that…you were so fond of hugging,” he managed to say when he could fill his lungs with air again.

Boffo gave him a sheepish smile. _I’m sorry if I’m going overboard, Ted. It’s just that I haven’t hugged someone in quite a while. I’m not allowed to hug any of the children where I work and I can’t hug Nimue, and Pollo at first was charging me money, which I was happy to pay, before he said he felt guilty about not being able to reciprocate thanks to a lack of functioning arms, so he tried to return my money, but I told him to keep it and-_ Boffo quickly cut himself off. _And now I’m rambling. I’m very sorry for being such a poor host._

“It’s alright, don’t worry about it,” Ted said with a grin. He knew from Ninja that Boffo was a very friendly person who loved being around others, so living practically alone while being separated from his friends and boyfriend was sure to have put a strain on him. “I’d be happy to talk with you about any topic you’re interested in, Boffo. That’s why I came over tonight. I feel as if I have been too focused on my training and not focused enough on my social life. While Ninja has always emphasized the values of hard work and dedication, he also says it’s important to keep our bonds strong, which is why I propose that you, me, and 80s Dan have an evening of fun and merriment together.”

Boffo’s eyes lit up as if Ted had just suggested that Christmas was coming tomorrow. _That’s a brilliant idea! We can all get together and eat junk food and watch movies and talk for hours and hours on end!_

“Exactly,” Ted replied, nodding happily as Boffo honked.

_It’ll be just like a sleepover – we should make it a sleepover, Ted!_

Ted’s eyes widened. “Oh, well, I don’t know about that. I do have work tomorrow and I thought you did too-”

 _At a sleepover, I’ll be more likely to share details about Ninja that I’m sure even you don’t know._ Boffo replied, his eyes twinkling.

Ted paused for a moment, considering this. “A sleepover it is!”

 _Hooray!_ Boffo clapped in excitement before jumping to his feet. _I’ll hurry up and gather my things while you call Dan and ask him about where we should have the party!_

Ted frowned then. “Well, to be honest, Dan hasn’t been responding to my calls for a while. Or my texts or emails. Maybe it would be better if you contact him, Boffo. He knows you better than he knows me, so perhaps he’d feel more comfortable if the idea came from you.”

Boffo’s excitement briefly dimmed as he turned back to Ted. _Actually, Dan hasn’t been responding to my messages either lately. I just assumed he was too busy with his friends to respond._

“Hmm.” Ted scratched his goatee for a moment. “Well, if we can’t get through to him this way, we’ll just try another. I know he won’t be able to turn down an offer for fun if we show up in person.”

 _That’s a great idea! Dan always loves it when people drop by unannounced!_ Boffo honked happily. _Here, take this extra teleporter, Ted, and let’s meet back here in around ten minutes._

“I will see you then,” Ted said, accepting the device with a bow. “I hope Dan is a fan of Pierre Kirby movies.”

\-----

“Come on, Dan, get your ass off the couch,” Dolly chided as she ran the vacuum over the carpet. “The Crabtrees are going to be here in five minutes. Don’t you want to make yourself presentable?”

“I don’t think Dan knows the meaning of the word,” ROB replied, rolling along the arm of the couch close to where Dan’s head rested. 

“Shut up, ROB!” Dolly said, before glancing over at the man himself. Dan had finally emerged from his room after the smell of old pizza boxes and soda cans had grown overwhelming, but he had taken to lying on the couch with a blanket pulled over his head and ignoring most of the world. While Dolly had been grateful for the chance to clean his room, she was also worried about how down Dan seemed, and how with each passing day he seemed to grow worse. 

“Seriously Dan, have dinner with us,” Dolly said after putting the vacuum away and sitting down beside the lumpy blanket that now constituted her roommate. “You haven’t seen the Crabtrees in three weeks.”

“He also hasn’t seen a shower in three weeks.” ROB muttered. 

“I said shut up,” Dolly snapped, her irritation growing. Luckily the doorbell was enough to distract ROB from tormenting Dan further and he quickly went to greet their guests. 

“Why hello, Mrs. Crabtree. You are looking lovely today.”

“And you’re looking clunky and outdated as ever,” Travis replied as he and his wife came inside. 

Instantly the two found themselves crinkling their noses. “Whoa, what reeks?” Mrs. Crabtree wondered. 

“That would be the depressed idiot on the couch,” ROB answered, looking back to Dan with as much disgust as a robot could muster. 

“God, he smells terrible,” Travis started coughing and moved to open a window. “Do we really have to eat in these conditions?”

“Yeah, why don’t we just go out tonight?” Mrs. Crabtree suggested. 

Dolly heard this suggestion and frowned. “I don’t know, guys. I don’t think Dan will go out with us and I’m not sure it’s a good idea to leave him alone right now.”

“Oh come on, what’s the worst thing he could do?” Travis asked skeptically. “We’re talking about Dan, here. He might be stupid but he’s not a threat...to himself at least,” he muttered, remembering one dark encounter he’d shared with the 80s lover.

Dolly shook the blanket lump impatiently. “Dan, come on. You can’t just lay there. Shower up and come out with us. It’ll be good for you!”

“Leave me alone.” Dan murmured from underneath, the first words she’d heard him say in some time.

“There, see? He doesn’t wanna go. Now come on, its dollar beer night and I got a fresh fifty in my pocket,” Mrs. Crabtree remarked, heading for the door with ROB at her heels. 

Dolly groaned, losing her patience as she yanked the blanket off of Dan, Travis covering his nose and cursing as the reek of old clothes and body odor hit him in the face. “Christ, he smells like a landfill!”

“That’s probably where he got most of his film collection,” ROB remarked dryly. 

Dan covered his eyes from the bright light invading his space, his neck bright red from scratch marks and his normally tidy goatee bushy and overgrown. 

“Dan, I’m tired of this!” Dolly said, looking as annoyed as she sounded. “It’s been over two months and you’ve done nothing but mope around! What would 90s Kid say if he saw you like this?”

Dan twitched violently, clutching his head. “Shut up,” he groaned. Why wouldn’t she stop mentioning his name? 

“I mean it, Dan! You stink to high heavens, you haven’t sold anything to help with the finances lately, I had to spend three hours cleaning all the filth out of your room, and you haven’t spoken a word to us in weeks! 90s Kid had better come back soon, or else I might have to start looking for a new roommate!”

“Shut up! Shut up! Don’t you ever SHUT UP?!” Dan shouted, sitting up and unleashing a bloodshot glare on the woman.

Dolly blinked in surprise at Dan’s sudden rage before scowling angrily back at him. “Alright, fine. Be that way. Stay here in this empty house all by yourself and have a pity party, because I am sick and tired of pitying you. If you don’t want my help, I won’t offer it anymore.” She tossed the blanket back onto his body and turned to the Crabtrees then. “Come on, guys, let’s just go. I’m sick of being cooped up with him anyway.”

“Not a shocker,” Travis mumbled as the four made their way out of the house. 

Dan waited until he heard the car drive off into the distance before he got to his feet. He wasn’t the steadiest of people at the moment, but he didn’t care. He didn’t really care about anything right now, not his beloved 80s classics, or Crystal Pepsi, or Cinema Snob, and especially not himself. Dan didn’t even feel like he was actually existing right now. He felt hollow and fragile, as if a stiff breeze could shatter him into pieces, and his mind, when it wasn’t flashing images of 90s Kid, was fuzzy and heavy. It almost hurt to think now, even about 90s Kid...90s Kid... 

Dan closed his eyes and whimpered. 90s Kid was gone. He’d been gone for over two months and there had been no word from him or any of his friends. There was no way of knowing how long he would continue to be away, or even if he would ever return...

“Ahhh.” Dan clutched at his chest, panting softly as he tried to shake those awful thoughts away. “No...no...he’ll come back. Kid will...always come back to me...always...always…”

Dan once again stared down at the shiny red ring on his finger, as he often did when he needed comforting, but this time his vision was blurry and the brightness of the gems hurt his head. God, his head, it hurt, it hurt so much. Why did it have to hurt so much? It never hurt before when Kid was here. It never hurt before when Kid wasn’t here but Dan could escape...escape…he needed to escape. 

At once, Dan scrambled up the stairs and grabbed his wallet, pulling out all the cash he could find, before he hurried back down the stairs and out the door. Escape...escape...Dan could escape...all this pain and emptiness...he must escape…he must...

\-----

About twenty minutes later, Boffo and Ted walked up the driveway of Dolly’s house carrying overnight bags, VHS tapes, and bags of food. Dolly’s car was nowhere to be seen, as expected, but Dan’s car was also missing, and the house was dark. Ted looked to Boffo in confusion.

“It doesn’t seem as if anyone is home. You did text Dolly about our intentions to visit Dan, right?”

Boffo nodded. _She told me that she was going out with friends but that Dan had stayed home by himself. I don’t know why his car is gone as well._

“How strange.” Ted walked up to the front door and rang the doorbell, waiting a few minutes before pressing it again. There was no response.

 _Dan?_ Boffo honked as loudly as he could. _It’s Boffo and Kung-Tai Ted. Are you home? Are you alright in there?_

They knocked and rang the bell a few more times before looking to each other in confusion.

“I guess he decided to go out.”

 _Ted, I don’t have a good feeling about this._ Boffo pulled out his phone and re-read the text from Dolly. _Dolly told me that Dan seemed worse than usual tonight and tried to dissuade us from coming to see him, but I didn’t take that as seriously as I probably should have._

“What do you mean?” Ted asked. 

Boffo looked frightened as he honked. _Before he left, 90s Kid asked me to look out for Dan because he’s had problems in the past._

“You mean with…?” Ted trailed off and his eyes widened. “Oh no. You don’t think…?”

 _I’m afraid that I do._ Boffo’s face started to crumple. _What have I done? I promised 90s Kid I’d watch out for him but now-_

“No. We are not going to give up that easily.” Ted’s expression grew determined and he stared at Boffo with a confidence he was still growing used to expressing. “It might not be too late to find Dan and stop him before he does something he’ll regret. We have to think positively now, Boffo, so save your sorrows for a later time, because right now, Dan needs us to find him as quickly as possible.”

Boffo sniffled before quickly wiping his face with a handkerchief and nodding. _You’re right, you’re right. We must focus on finding Dan before anything else._ His eyes lit up then and he pulled from his pocket a folded up piece of notebook paper. _90s Kid gave me this list of places Dan liked to visit. He was so worried about being separated from him…_

“Well, let’s put his worries to rest.” Ted ripped the paper in half and handed one piece to Boffo. “Let’s split up and search. The first to find Dan calls the other before approaching. If we come up empty after searching the entire list, we meet back here to regroup. Do you have any questions?”

Boffo pocketed his handkerchief and pulled out his teleporter, now wearing a determined expression as well. _No. I’m ready._

“Then let’s go.”

\-----

Sometime later, Ted found himself walking along a street lined with brand new model houses. The rain had stopped, allowing winter flurries to fill up the night air instead, and Ted couldn’t help shivering as he moved along the snow-covered street. This was the only location left to search on his list but Ted wasn’t quite sure what to make of it. Was he supposed to search every house in this area? Or the woods surrounding the houses? The latter task would take quite a bit of time and skill, skill that Ted wasn’t sure he possessed, but whenever he started to doubt himself, he would close his eyes and think of the times he had done the impossible. He’d protected Ninja from harm. He’d protected his students from harm. He had become a man worthy of Ninja’s love. He was strong and capable and he could do this. He could protect those who had been left behind, who were hurting as much as Ted did when he was lying in bed alone every night. 

Ted closed his eyes and thought of everything Ninja had taught him. Clues. If Dan were in this area, he would have left clues behind. Ted began his search anew, hurrying up and down the road and peering into every backyard until at last he spotted the faint remains of tire tracks behind the house at the very end of the dead-end street. After following those tracks, Ted found Dan’s car parked under a few trees heavy with snow. The driver’s side door was still open and the hood was still warm when Ted touched it. 

“He must be close.” Ted bent down to the ground and found even fainter footprints heading toward the large, white house. When he got to the back door, a broken window revealed how Dan had managed to enter a building that should have been locked. Ted quickly pulled out his phone. “Boffo, I think I found him. Come to the last white house on Snowbarry Lane and hurry!”

Seconds later, Boffo appeared at Ted’s side and after giving each other looks to bolster their confidence, they entered the house.

It only took a few steps for them to find Dan. He was sitting at the kitchen table with a bag of white powder in his hands, but he looked nothing like the smiling man they were so familiar with. Dan’s face was almost white aside from the bloodshot eyes, and the blood seeping from his neck, which looked as if it had been scratched raw. A shocked expression crossed his face when he saw the equally shocked pair staring back at him.

_Dan-_

“Get out! Get out of here!” Dan shouted, his voice gravelly and his eyes burning. Boffo and Ted shared a look of fear; Dan had never raised his voice in anger to them like that. 

Boffo raised his horn again. _Dan, what are you doing? You’re hurt and not thinking clearly! Please stop this!_

“Dan, Boffo and I want to help you,” Ted said, taking a small step toward the table.

Dan jumped up and clutched the bag protectively to his chest, looking more crazed and disheveled than they’d ever seen him. “Get away from me! Don’t come any closer! I’ll…I’ll hurt you both! You’ve seen how I fucked myself up, but I swear I’ll do even worse to you if you don’t back away!” He shook his head for emphasis, spraying droplets of blood in every direction.

“Distract him,” Ted hissed into Boffo’s ear before raising his hands in seeming surrender. “Dan, please, there’s no need for threats.”

 _Dan, think about what you’re doing._ Boffo slowly raised his hands as well. _Think about all the progress you’ve made. Think about what your actions would do to 90s Kid._

Dan flinched at the mention of his boyfriend’s name, and Ted took the opportunity to lunge at Dan. He grabbed him by the arms, struggling to hold the wild man back, before turning them both around and pinning Dan to the wall. As Dan gasped from the impact, Ted ripped the baggie from Dan’s hands and tossed it over his shoulder. “Boffo! Get rid of it!”

Boffo trembled violently, but nodded and caught the bag before hurrying back outside.

“Give that back!” Dan shouted, thrashing even harder against Ted. “I need that! Dammit, Boffo, get back here!” A kick to Ted’s shins helped Dan break free of Ted’s grip and he followed after Boffo, Ted hurrying close behind. Ted tried to grab at Dan’s jacket to hold him still, but Dan slammed the back door into Ted’s face, leaving him slightly dazed but unharmed. 

By the time Dan made it outside, Boffo was shaking a mostly empty bag into a snowbank. “What the hell did you do?!” Dan shouted, grabbing Boffo by the shoulders and shoving him against side of the house. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done?! How much of my money you just threw away?! How much of my _sanity_ you just threw away?!”

 _Dan, let me go! You’re scaring me!_ Boffo pleaded, growing ever more frightened at the look in his eyes and the blood dripping down his body. _90s Kid would be heartbroken if you-_

“90s Kid isn’t here!” Dan yelled in his face. “He hasn’t been here and we don’t know when he’s going to be back! For all we know he won’t be coming back! Or Linkara! Or Harvey! Or Ninja! Or Linksano!”

Boffo’s eyes went wide, his face stricken, and Dan laughed bitterly, his lips curving into an awful smile. “Yeah, Linksano! How do you know if he’s coming back? What if he got shot by a Magic Gun and is just lying dead somewhere in a pool of his own blood? What are you gonna do then, Boffo?” Dan reached for the empty bag and shook it in front of his face. “You gonna start using this stuff? You gonna go to this stuff and destroy your life like me? Huh? HUH?!”

 _Stop it! Just stop it!_ Boffo honked desperately, shaking his head vigorously and feeling like he was going to faint. _Please! Please, just stop! I can’t do this anymore!_ Boffo froze when he saw small spots of crimson dotting the freshly fallen snow and the horrible image Dan had described refused to leave his mind. He dropped his head into his hands and started wailing silently. Having the very fears that he had tried so hard to keep at bay screamed into his face by one of his closest friends was terrifying. He could never go on if Linksano really were dead, in some far-away place where Boffo could not tell him he loved him, could not comfort him or hold his hand ever again.

Dan watched Boffo break down in tears and some of the fog in his mind started to vanish, allowing shapes and colors and people to come back into focus. He let go of the clown and backed up a few feet before stumbling to his knees. “Boffo...oh God...I’m s-so sorry...w-what have I done?!” Dan’s chest heaved as he began to sob miserably just as Ted appeared in the backyard, leaving him a petrified, helpless witness to the scene.

“I...I have to take control of this situation before it gets any worse,” Ted soon thought, collecting his wits as best he could. He knew that if Ninja were here, he would be leaping into action to comfort the two sobbing men, and Ted refused to let Ninja down by failing to do the same. 

“Boffo, Dan, please listen to me,” he finally spoke, looking from one to the other. “I understand your pain and your feelings very well. Every day I wake up and think about Ninja, wondering where he is and worrying about his safety. It is very hard to even get out of bed some days because my fears threaten to swallow me up,” Ted admitted, feeling slightly embarrassed to be saying it, but also encouraged when he saw Boffo look to him with watery eyes. “But I know that I must get up,” he continued, trying to sound as confident as Ninja always did. “I know that I must not let my worry paralyze me from living a good, healthy life. Ninja would not want that for me, just as Linksano would not want it for you, Boffo, and...and 90s Kid would certainly never want that for you, Dan.”

Ted looked over at Dan, somewhat relieved to see that his sobbing had quieted and that he was wiping his eyes now. “I also know that Ninja would want me to believe in him and in the team to work together and come home safely. Ninja will do everything in his power to protect 90s Kid and Linksano, and I truly believe that they will do everything to protect Ninja in turn. Their strength and their teamwork are too great to be so easily destroyed, so I know that I must stop worrying. I must place my trust in all of them, because one day they will all return home safely and ready to fill the holes in our hearts again, and when that day comes, I want to be a person Ninja can be proud of.” Ted paused then, running out of steam a bit, and tried to think of any other motivational advice he could give.

Before he could come up with something, however, Dan spoke in a low, raspy voice. “I...want to be someone K-Kid can be proud of too,” he said before looking down at his empty baggie in shame. “He...he would never be proud of me for almost doing this...I...I can’t th-thank you enough for stopping me.” Dan’s eyes watered up again, with gratitude this time, before he pulled himself to his feet and lunged at Ted, crushing his body in an enormous hug.

Ted wrapped his arms around Dan and patted his back as the man began sobbing again, Boffo wrapping his arms around both of them from behind. _It’s alright, Dan. It’ll be alright now._ Boffo honked soothingly, also calmed by Ted’s speech. _Don’t push us away anymore. We’re your friends, and we want to help you._

“H-how can you want to help me?” Dan whimpered. “I just did unspeakable t-things to you.”

“Sometimes we all do crazy things when we’re desperate.” Ted said, understanding in his voice. The three remained huddled together for a little longer and Boffo pulled out his teleporter. Once they had safely arrived at Dan’s house, they slowly separated. 

Dan wiped at his eyes and looked to the other two pitifully. “What...what do I do now?” he asked in a small voice. “Nothing’s felt right ever since Kid left. It’s like I don’t even k-know who I am anymore.”

Boffo smiled gently and patted Dan’s arm. _That’s why we came to see you. We brought food and movies to watch and we’ll gladly stay with you all night if that’s what you need, won’t we, Ted?_

Ted smiled back. “Certainly. Although, no offense, Dan, but I believe perhaps a shower and some first aid might be your first course of action now that we’re home.”

Dan looked down at himself and felt humiliation wash over him as he saw the unkempt state of his clothes and body. What would 90s Kid say if he could see him now? “Y-yeah. I-I should do that.”

 _I’ll get you some clean clothes from your room. Do you want me to wait while you’re showering?_ Boffo asked, and Dan nodded. 

“I p-probably shouldn’t be by myself right now.” More tears started to leak down his cheeks. “I don’t know what I would do without friends like you two.”

Ted patted his back once again. “You two focus on cleaning up and I’ll retrieve Dan’s car. Then I’ll be down here if you need me.” Before leaving to fetch the vehicle, Ted glanced back inside the house, watching the two men walk up the stairs, and hoped that this would be the last and only time Dan almost fell off the wagon.

Boffo went into Dan’s room and started looking through drawers, grabbing clean underwear and pajamas, and brought them into the bathroom with him. Dan was undressed from the waist up, having taken off his glasses and set them on the bathroom counter, and was peering closely at his throat, as well as the bags underneath his eyes with dismay. “I promised Kid that I’d sleep better while he was gone,” he murmured, touching them lightly with his fingers. “I also promised to take care of myself. I promised him so many things that I haven’t been able to keep…”

Boffo’s heart went out to Dan, knowing how guilty he must be feeling after everything that had occurred. He had almost broken his promise to 90s Kid as well, but now the clown was determined to make sure they both kept their word for as long as was necessary.

_I know, Dan. I’m sure 90s Kid will forgive you when he comes home, because we’re going to help you feel better now so that you can sleep easy again._

Boffo frowned in worry as these words didn’t seem to help Dan at all, but rather made him start to tremble. “Boffo…stop. Just stop,” Dan said in a low, shaking voice. “Y-you have no idea what you’re saying.”

_What do you mean?_

“Why are you so nice?” Dan suddenly demanded, straightening up and looking Boffo dead in the eyes. “Why are you still acting like I’m your friend after what just happened?! Why are you so damn kind to people who don’t deserve it?!”

Boffo felt a start of panic in his chest at Dan’s words and considered honking for Ted, but decided against it since he most likely hadn’t returned yet. Dan was still working through his emotions, and Boffo wanted to help him see things clearly once more. He closed the bathroom door before turning back to Dan. He squared his shoulders and a mantle of dignity fell upon him. 

_Dan, you are my friend and always will be. I’ve always believed that everything can be solved through kindness, which is why I will never stop being kind to you. I know the type of person you truly are, and the person who just did all of those terrible things wasn’t you._

“That’s…that’s n-not fair…” Tears began welling in Dan’s eyes, the trembling growing steadily worse. “T-there…there has to be s-something that could upset you enough…has to be s-something to m-make you hate me…”

_Dan?_

“Everyone h-hates me and l-leaves eventually, so just get it over with, Boffo!”

Boffo was startled to find himself sitting on the edge of the bathtub, Dan’s dirty head burrowed into his lap, gripping his pink jacket in white-knuckled fists. He was weeping incoherently and Boffo felt his heart begin to race. Without Ted there as a buffer, he didn’t think he could handle Dan’s tears at all.

_Dan, please stop. Please, you-you can’t cry like this. Please, I-I’m still your friend, so there’s no need for this–please stop, Dan!_

“Y-you’re all g-going to leave me!” Dan sobbed passionately. “If e-even K-Kid could l-leave, then h-how could the r-rest of you s-stay with me!”

_90s Kid had to leave for the mission, Dan. It wasn’t that he wanted to-_

“B-but s-so many people have l-left me because I-I’m such a mess of a person!”

Boffo swallowed and squeezed his eyes shut, trying to regain enough control of himself to calm Dan as best he could. He opened his eyes and looked down and seemed to notice how thin Dan’s body looked, so small and vulnerable. Compared to his own physique, Boffo thought Dan looked like a lost, scared child, before realizing that was exactly what he was. Boffo used this thought to help him look past the tears and he gently ran his fingers through Dan’s oily hair, smiling in the way he always did when comforting scared children. 

_Hush. Hush now, Dan. It’s okay. I understand._

Dan lifted up a red, tear-streaked face to Boffo. “No, you can’t understand!” he yelled, before softening. “You’re-you’re too good to understand. Y-you don’t know h-how it feels to want something m-more than air itself even though you know it’ll completely wreck your life!” He laid his head back down and started sobbing again. “And t-the only t-thing that m-makes it b-bearable m-might never be c-coming ba-ack!”

Boffo didn’t let this deter him, cradling Dan’s head comfortingly. _But he will come back. I know that you’ve been left before, Dan, and that you’ve done some bad things in your life. Everyone has, that’s just what people do._

“Except y-you.”

 _Even me._ Dan looked up in surprise and sniffled. Boffo smiled. _I’ve made mistakes too, Dan. I know you must see me as someone who could never do a bad thing, but that’s not true. But one can still have done bad things and be a good person, just like I am, and just like you are._

“I…I did do b-bad things tonight,” Dan moaned, dropping his gaze. “I almost t-trashed my life and destroyed our d-dream.” Dan closed his eyes, shuddering as he remembered talking with 90s Kid about finding a house of their own. “Kid worked so h-hard to help me get clean and…and I almost t-turned my back on his love. If it w-weren’t for Ted and you…” Dan looked guiltily to Boffo then. “Boffo…w-what I did to you is unforgivable. Even if y-you can somehow forgive me, Linksano and the others w-will make sure I n-never see you again.”

 _They’re not going to find out._ Boffo replied calmly. _You didn’t mean to do this, Dan. Like Ted said before, we do crazy things when we’re desperate, and all you did was make a mistake. It won’t happen again, and I’ll never tell Linksano or Ninja or 90s Kid or anyone else. This is between the two of us, and I’ve already forgiven you for what you’ve done, because that’s what friends do._

Dan sighed and pressed closer to Boffo, closing his eyes as more tears oozed down his cheeks. “I-I’ve always w-wanted to have f-friends like that…like you…it was j-just a mistake…and K-Kid h-has to come back…he promised me he would.” He looked up at Boffo with desperation, as though Boffo knew everything and could somehow fix all that was wrong with him. “I-I’m s-so sorry…y-you d-don’t think I’m awful, right? Y-you like me? And y-you promise h-he’ll come back?”

Boffo smiled and nodded, wiping away the tears on Dan’s cheeks gently. _90s Kid and the others will all come back safe, I promise. And I don’t think you’re awful. You’re a good person, Dan, and a good friend, and everything will be alright. It’s alright, Dan. He’s going to come home._

\-----

After setting up the food and movies on the coffee table, Ted, now dressed for bed, laid out the sleeping bags, and was just about to pour some sodas when Boffo and Dan came downstairs, Dan looking clean and fresh, his goatee neatly shaven and neck covered in bandages, and Boffo also in his pajamas. He hadn’t expected the two to take so long, but the serene smile on Boffo’s face and Dan’s calmed expression reassured Ted that they had taken the time to patch things up. 

_Were you able to retrieve the car without any trouble, Ted?_

“Yes, it’s here back in its proper place. I also managed to clean up most of the house, but I wasn’t able to repair the window so it will have to be replaced.”

Dan’s expression grew guilty again. “I’m so sorry I made you do all that. Let me give you some money to replace the window, and to get your clothes dry-cleaned,” he added, his eyes darting to their overnight bags where the blood-stained garments had been stored.

 _Don’t worry about that, Dan._ Boffo replied with a kind smile. _We can take care of everything, so you should focus on feeling better._

“I already feel so much better,” Dan admitted as he sat down on the couch, Boffo sitting down right beside him. 

_I’m sure once you get some food into you that isn’t pizza, you’ll feel even greater._ Boffo cheerfully said as he reached for a dumpling, having noticed a large stack of boxes with the trash. _Perhaps we should make it a weekly event to get together and have an evening of dinner and company like this._

“Eh, m-maybe it could be more than once a week,” Dan replied as he loaded his plate with sesame chicken. “Like, oh say, four or five times?”

 _That sounds wonderful!_ Boffo quickly agreed, since being around a cheerful Dan would certainly help stave off boredom and loneliness. 

Ted couldn’t help feeling relief flood through him as the two began having an animated conversation. Even he was surprised by how much better he felt about Ninja’s absence now that he’d spoken about it to his friends, and he hoped that they would indeed gather together more often in the future to help each other stay strong. As Ted was about to join the men on the couch, his phone suddenly rang. 

“Greetings. This is Kung-Tai Ted.”

“Information,” a familiar female voice responded. “Greetings, Ted. This unit is Nimue, of Comicron-1, and Linkara’s base.”

“Oh, uh, hello Nimue,” Ted replied, while the other two looked over at him in surprise. “I don’t believe I’ve ever received a phone call from a spaceship before. Is there anything I can do for you?”

“This unit has received three messages that are to be delivered to you, Boffo, and 80s Dan. After searching through various satellite images, this unit has ascertained that these three men are all in the home shared by 80s Dan and Dolly.”

“That’s right, we are all here. What kind of messages do you have for us?”

“The messages are from 90s Kid, Doctor Linksano, and Ninja-Style Dancer.”

Ted’s mouth went dry and his heart started racing in his chest. “P-please hold for a minute while I put you on speakerphone,” he finally said, as he did just that, before he turned toward Boffo and Dan. “You all might want to listen to these messages Nimue has for us. Nimue, please, go ahead.”

“Confirmed. First message for 80s Dan, from 90s Kid.”

By the time Nimue had finished with her messages, the three were once again crying gently into tissues or their hands, but this time in joy and relief instead of sadness. _Thank goodness...thank goodness they are all right._ Boffo honked, his hand at his heart. 

“90s Kid…he’ll be back soon…he loves me…he loves me.” Dan whispered, pressing his ring to his lips. 

Ted was uncharacteristically silent this time, for never would he have expected to receive such a touching message from Ninja. His sweet, strong, amazing Ninja was okay, and he missed him and loved him. Ted didn’t know when, but he knew that one day, no matter how far off that was, they would all be united once more.


	11. Chapter 11

The color drained from Harvey’s face when he saw the golden words beckoning him to approach a particular door.

_ENTER_

“I guess it’s me, then.” 

Harvey almost jumped when Linkara placed a hand on his shoulder. “It’ll be alright. We’re all here with you, remember?”

“Thanks, Kid.” Harvey smiled at his boyfriend, but his hands were shaking at his sides. He almost had trouble holding his gun steady while Linkara secured the area and when he stepped into the room, his knees felt like they might buckle at any moment. 

Harvey took in his surroundings, which appeared to be a police interrogation room, something he was familiar with thanks to countless movies and detective novels he’d enjoyed over the years, with a serious expression. He felt apprehensive as he thought about what this trial could mean for him. Was he going to be interrogated? Harvey figured he could handle being yelled at or even beaten up by a cop, since he’d had experience with that, but if it was someone unexpected doing the interrogating all bets were off.

“What do you cats think about…?” Harvey trailed off when he realized he was alone. The only face he could see was his own, a reflection staring back at him glumly from a large pane of glass covering the entire left side of the room. Further investigation of the area revealed that this room didn’t have any windows or doors, simply stark grey walls, a white ceiling with a single lightbulb swinging from it, and a cement floor with a small grate in the center of it. Harvey swallowed hard and tried to keep his wits about him. It looked like he was going to have to go through this alone, so the quicker he solved this puzzle, the quicker he’d be reunited with everyone. Keeping this in mind, Harvey began looking around the sparse pieces of furniture in the room for his scroll, but could not seem to locate it at all.

On the other side of the wall-length pane of glass, 90s Kid was pounding his fists against it as hard as he could. “Harvey-dude! Harvey! Can you hear us, man?”

*I don’t think he can, 90s Kid.* Ninja held up. *He is behind two-way glass, meaning that we can see him, but he cannot see or hear us.* 

“I don’t see a scroll anywhere in that room,” Linksano remarked, before he felt something roll against his boot. Unlike the other scrolls, this one was gold in color, and the four couldn’t help admiring it briefly before Linkara unrolled it.

“Words Cannot Forgive. Obey the Words: Survive.”

A chill traveled down each of their spines once Linkara finished speaking. “W-what does that mean, dude?” 90s Kid quavered. “What does Harvey have to do?” Before anyone could answer, the four noticed Harvey making odd movements in the other room and turned to watch him. His movements were soon explained when they realized that water had started gushing into the room from the grate in the floor.

“What the hell?!” Harvey took several steps back from the sudden spray of liquid before he started to look around wildly. No windows. No doors. Nothing that could help him escape. Harvey moved toward the mirror then and started pounding on it. “Lemme out! Is anyone in there? Lemme out right now!”

“Harvey-dude!” 90s Kid was pounding on the glass again, trying to respond to the singer’s shouts, while Linkara rushed over to the one door in their half of the room. He twisted the knob eagerly and then angrily when he realized it was locked. 

“Damn it! Damn it all!” Linkara started kicking the door, trying to break it down with brute strength, but it wouldn’t budge. “Come on, help me!”

Ninja started to search the dark area they were trapped in, but there was no furniture at all to be found. There was nothing but a stone floor and one naked bulb hanging from the ceiling, similar to the one in Harvey’s room. Ninja leapt to the ceiling to study it, but found it to be nothing more than a cheap light which would break if slammed against the door, so instead he headed to Linkara’s side and tried to help him open it. 

“It’s no use,” Linksano told them after a quick scan of the door. “It’s made of reinforced titanium. There’s no way to open it from in here.”

“We have to open it!” Linkara insisted, still kicking at it furiously. “We have to get to Harvey before that room is swallowed with water!”

“What about a magic spell?” 90s Kid suggested.

“I don’t know any for opening locked doors!” Linkara moaned, regretting his laziness when it came to his magical studies.

*Linkara, remember that this is Harvey’s trial* Ninja tried to remind him. *We might not be able to do anything to help him.* 

“I refuse to accept that! I won’t just stand here and watch him drown!” Linkara suddenly reached into his coat and pulled out his Magic Gun, aiming at the center of the metallic door. After a few shots failed to even scratch it, Linkara groaned angrily and returned to the window, where 90s Kid remained staring at Harvey. He started pounding on the glass before shooting it as well with the Gun, to similar non-effects. “Damn it! Damn it all! Break, damn you, break!”

“Linkara-dude-”

“Break break break!”

“Linkara!” Linkara let out a soft growl when 90s Kid grabbed him by the shoulders and spun him so they faced each other. “That isn’t helping! You gotta stop!”

“I gotta help Harvey!” Linkara countered. 

“We can’t help him and you know it!” Linkara blinked in surprise at how forceful the teen sounded, but 90s Kid wasn’t done yet. “You know we gotta do it this way! Harvey has to survive by himself! It’s totally hard to watch this, but he can do it, Linkara! You helped him survive a long time ago, and now he’s strong enough to do it himself! You just gotta believe in Harvey-dude, okay?”

Linkara took in 90s Kid’s red face, trembling shoulders, and the barely concealed fear in his words before nodding. He was the leader here. He had to keep everyone calm now no matter how he felt inside. 

“You’re...you’re right...we have to believe in Harvey now. Thank you, 90s Kid.”

90s Kid barely acknowledged the words, having already turned back to the window. Linkara and the others joined him, watching fearfully, but also daring to have hope that Harvey would be able to overcome this task on his own.

Harvey eventually gave up on pounding on the window, realizing that even if the team was out there, there was probably no way they could break in and interfere. The water was up to his knees now and he was at a loss for what to do. He was a former Navy Captain and had spent a lot of time near the water, so he knew how to swim, but if the water level grew too high then even the best swimmer would be in trouble. 

_“Come on, gotta think, gotta think. Maybe there’s a secret door on the floor? Nah, I already examined it earlier, there’s nothing down there. What about on the ceiling? I couldn’t touch it before, but now, if I let the water level get high enough, I can search it up close. But if there’s nothing there, then I’ll be in even bigger trouble.”_

As Harvey struggled to think, the water kept rushing in faster than ever, and soon he was up to his waist in no time at all. “Oh geez,” Harvey murmured, staring around for some way, any way to be able to survive. 

_“…You must have had many scares in your life…the water that pulled you down until you almost could not breathe…most terrifying… ”_

Harvey shivered before shaking his head. _“No, I refuse to let that kooky broad be right! I can’t go down like this! I refuse to die, not when I finally have something to live for again!”_

Harvey looked down when he felt something in the water brush against his hand, and noticed something strange. 

“What the...?” He reached down and pulled out Linksano’s goggles. “These belong to Doc…” Harvey’s eyes went wide. Had something happened to him? What was happening to the team? Where were they? Were they trying to find him, or was this all part of the trial’s plan to trick him? The water was up to his chest now. Harvey started to see more things floating in the water, including Ninja’s mask and Linkara’s coat. He reached for the coat and held it up, wondering why these items were appearing all of a sudden. 

“What the hell is he doing?” Linksano wondered, watching as Harvey looked to be examining nothing at all. Nobody responded, aside from the gasps that appeared when the water rose to Harvey’s neck. They watched as the singer took in a giant breath, desperate to keep his head above water. 

“Harvey!” Linkara yelled, not realizing that he had a death grip on 90s Kid’s hand to keep himself upright. 90s Kid squeezed back, too frightened to utter a sound. Linksano and Ninja watched helplessly as Harvey continued splashing around and examining invisible things in the water.

More items began to appear around him, like Boffo’s wig, Dan’s white jacket, and Ted’s piano-key tie. Harvey wasn’t sure what any of it meant or what he was supposed to do with them now that they had appeared.

 _“Dammit, Finevoice, you can’t hold your breath forever, think of something!”_ he scolded himself. _“You have to get yourself out of here or else-”_

Harvey’s thoughts stopped abruptly when he saw something else floating nearby. A navy blue jacket with a white crest sown across the chest, and his hands trembled as he reached for it. 

_“This...this can’t be...”_ He had seen this jacket in his memories a million times. His wife had insisted on sending Charlie to private school to ensure he’d have a good education. Even though he wasn’t thrilled with the uniform, Charlie had always kept it neat and clean so his mother would be happy.

Harvey clutched the jacket to his chest, wondering if this would disappear after the trial or if he would be able to hold it close to him forever; then an article of clothing in the distance nearly made his heart stop.

It was a pale green hospital gown, faintly stained with blood and vomit even through the water, and Harvey forgot all thoughts of trying to escape. He just floated, without moving at all, ignoring the ache that was settling in his lungs. He thought he would never have to see that thing again, had hoped he would never have to see it again. Just one simple piece of cloth brought everything back to him, the fear, the heartbreak, the pain he’d felt as he held his son’s weak hand, only able to watch as his darling little boy slipped away. 

_“Give up…”_ A soft voice murmured, appearing from nowhere, but speaking directly into Harvey’s ear. _“He’s gone…somewhere you have never been able to follow…but now you can…give up…sleep…they don’t need you…follow him to where you’ve longed to go…”_

 _“Charlie...”_ Harvey thought, ceasing to kick or struggle as the water climbed higher. _“How can I go on without him? Why...why was he taken from me?”_ He closed his eyes. _“I can’t do this anymore...”_ he thought, being successfully lulled by the invisible force in the water. _“I could just...stop…I could...go real peaceful...see my little boy again...keep him safe...Charlie...”_

Harvey was almost about to let the darkness fully envelop him and he closed his eyes, prepared for whatever was next, when something brushed against his fingers. 90s Kid’s hat. 90s Kid. 

Suddenly memories flooded his brain that, like the water pouring into the room, Harvey was unable to stop. Memories of all the times he’d seen 90s Kid smile, the sound of his laugh, the way he drew Harvey pictures and talked endlessly about his accomplishments and hopes and dreams, working as hard as he could to make Harvey proud. He remembered the day that 90s Kid had begged him to be his dad, and the days he desperately wanted 90s Kid to be his son. 

Harvey opened his eyes wider when he saw Linkara’s hat floating along behind the teen’s. Linkara. The man who had saved his life, who picked him up from the dirt, dusted him off, and helped him become strong enough to face the world again. The man who helped his heart heal after losing Suzanne, the man who helped him realize that true love could happen twice in the same lifetime. The man he was more in love with every day he spent with him.

More garments from his friends wafted into view; it was enough to send a jolt of realization to Harvey’s brain, and his legs began to move again. He couldn’t abandon the team. He couldn’t abandon his family. He loved them all.

Harvey slowly released the school jacket and watched it float away. _“I’m sorry, Charlie,”_ he thought as he began to swim, _“but I hope you’ll forgive me if your dad keeps you waiting just a little bit more…”_

 _“Let go!”_ the voice hissed, angrily now. _“Forget everything! It would be so easy! You must forget! Close your eyes and forget! Let go...let go of the chains weighing you down...just close your eyes and sleep! Sleep with us!”_

“Argghhh!” Harvey groaned, the water up to his eyes by now, causing him to tilt his head upwards. “No! These aren’t chains!” He gathered all the floating pieces of cloth and clutched them tightly to his chest. “These are my lifesavers!” Harvey cried, gurgling slightly as water kept spilling into his mouth. “I won’t let them go, not after they saved me...saved me?” Harvey’s eyes suddenly widened as the answer became clear to him. He ignored the angrily shouting voice, took a deep breath, and dove down under the water, swimming all the way to the bottom of the room. 

“What’s he doing?” Linkara cried, watching as Harvey moved toward the grate and started pushing his hands over the small hole. “He can’t stop the water like that! There’s already too much in there!”

Unbeknownst to the four, Harvey was not just wildly pushing his hands into the grate. He was in fact stuffing every article of clothing he’d collected through the holes as fast as he could. Within seconds, the grate was blocked and Harvey cheered internally as he waved his hand around and felt no more water spurting out of it. As quickly as he could, he swam up and gasped very loudly before filling his lungs with air again. Now that he’d stopped the water, all he had to do was find a way out. 

Harvey looked around, noticing that the ceiling was now inches from his head, and spotted the faint outline of a rectangle to his right. _“I knew it!”_ He swam toward the rectangle, pushed against it with all his might, and cried out happily when the tile popped open, revealing a hole he could climb into. “I...I did it...” Harvey said, smiling despite his shivers. He quickly pulled himself up and into the ceiling space before casting one final glance down. 

The beautiful blue coat was floating within his reach and Harvey lowered his hand, letting the damp material brush his fingertips. “One day, Charlie, I’ll buy you a brand new coat. The most beautiful coat in all of Heaven.” he murmured. A sudden flash of a smiling boy’s face entered his mind and Harvey felt a surge of love course through his body. He quickly wiped the tears from his eyes and turned back to the task at hand. “Now, how far does an old man have to crawl before he loses all his dignity?”

On the other side of the glass, Linkara and 90s Kid were jumping for joy and hugging each other. 

“He made it! He’s safe!”

“I knew he could do it! Harvey would never leave us like that!”

“I do wonder how he stopped the flow of water though,” Linksano asked, still peering at the drain opening as best he could. 

*Perhaps he used something invisible to us* Ninja guessed, remembering their past trials. 

“Perhaps,” Linksano relented before he gasped as not just the water, but the entire room vanished before his eyes. “Linkara! Everyone! Look!”

Linkara was too busy staring at the scroll in his hands, which had started to emanate a white light. The words written across it vanished, replaced by new ones. “Congratulations. You have passed the trials and proven yourself worthy. Repeat these words and the weapon will be revealed.”

Linkara spoke aloud the words that were printed in a language most couldn’t even dream of deciphering, and another blinding flash of light filled the area. Once it had vanished, the team was left staring at a small, wooden, levitating box which glowed bright green in color. They admired it in awe for a few moments before Linkara slowly reached out and took the box into his hands. Everyone huddled around him eagerly as he removed the shiny, polished lid to reveal a quill that shimmered like glass, bathing everything around it with color and light. 90s Kid shivered at the sight of it, wordlessly looking to Linkara to ask what it could do. To their surprise, Linkara closed the box without even touching it. 

*You are not going to try it out, Linkara?* 

“It’s too risky,” Linkara informed them. “Since I have no idea what this thing might do, I don’t want to test it out here. We’ll wait until we get back home, where we know it’ll be safe.”

“Home,” Linksano whispered, and the others felt relief flood through them. They had the weapon. The mission was over. Now they could return to their own world and see their loved ones again.

“Dude, can we go home right now?” 90s Kid’s question was as hopeful as a child’s, and Linkara couldn’t help chuckling. 

“Aren’t you forgetting something? Let’s go get Harvey first and then we can get out of here.” As he spoke, the titanium door swung open before them, allowing the team to step out into the hallway where Harvey would presumably appear. 

“Harvey-dude? You totally did it, you passed the trial!”

“Finevoice?” Linksano called out, waving his tricorder around and adjusting the settings on his goggles once again. “Where are you?”

Ninja walked back through the door they’d all just exited to search both halves of the room separated by the two-way mirror, appearing on the walls and ceiling in barely-noticeable flashes of black, before he turned to them and shrugged. *I cannot find him anywhere.*

“Harvey! Are you stuck in the ceiling?” Linkara called, trying to listen for any noise which could have been made by the singer. “Ninja, Linksano, is there any sign of him?”

“Not to my knowledge,” Linksano said, a frown forming on his face. 

*I cannot sense him at all* Ninja reluctantly revealed, though he did not stop his search. That is, he did not stop his search until he was forcefully ejected from the room, the door slamming shut behind him.

90s Kid turned to Linkara in confusion and worry. “What’s going on?” 90s Kid wondered. “Where’s Harvey-dude?”

“I don’t know,” Linkara admitted before his expression grew angry. “Hey!” Linkara shouted, looking up at the impossibly white ceiling. “What did you do with Harvey? Give him back to us right now! We have to find him before we can leave! Let us go back into that room to find him! Hey! Is anyone listening to me?”

“I’m listening.” The four whirled around to stare in shock at a young woman standing before them. She wore a purple cloak around her body and held a book that Linkara recognized immediately, since he had the same one back at the base. 

“Who are you?” he asked, stepping in front of his team protectively, ready at any second to pull his Magic Gun if necessary. 

The woman smiled, a cold smile that didn’t reach her eyes. “You can call me Elle. Oh, and by the way, you can’t return to the room of a completed trial without the one who completed the trial being present.”

Linkara frowned. “Thanks for the tip,” he said dryly. “So, what do you want, Elle?”

“The same thing you do.” She glanced to the box in Linkara’s hands. “The same thing anyone who enters The Aisles of Write desires: that quill.”

“The…Aisles of Write? Ugh…” The team couldn’t help groaning when they heard this. “That’s just awful.” 

“I believe Boffo could come up with a better pun than that.”

*Please don’t give him any ideas.*

“Ahem.” Elle cleared her throat, her cold smile still in place. “So is that a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’?” 

Linkara’s face quickly hardened. They had come too far and suffered through too much to give up their prize that easily. 

Elle smirked, easily reading his face. “I know that you must be thinking it’s ridiculous of me to ask for something you all worked so hard to acquire. If I’d been the one who was plagued by the cry of a thousand voices or forced to cut into my own arms, I would be reluctant to give it up as well.”

“You were spying on us?” Linksano cried, looking truly appalled by such news, as well as disturbed to know that her presence had not once been detected by any of them.

*How did you manage to keep track of us without giving yourself away?* Ninja wondered.

Elle smirked. “I knew it. You’re all a bunch of inexperienced fools who only managed to pass the trials by luck. Did you honestly think a seasoned sorceress who has visited this universe multiple times would be unable to detect the presence of you novices?”

90s Kid’s stomach turned to lead. “Oh no…when I used the communicator, Linksano said someone could track the signal…is that how you found us?” He looked to Linkara in shame. “I-I’m so sorry! This is all my fault!”

“Actually, it’s all his fault,” Elle replied, pointing a finger at Linksano. “I aimed a tracking spell directly at him, and he never even brought it to your attention. Pitiful.”

“I-I thought I was still experiencing the after-effects of my trial,” Linksano tried to explain, his fingers twitching madly as he tried not to feel humiliated about his failure. “I swear, Linkara, if I’d thought for one second that someone had used magic on me-”

“I know, Linksano. I believe you.” Linksano blinked in surprise before smiling a little in relief, but Linkara was too busy looking at Elle with contempt to notice. “Okay, so you tracked us and we didn’t notice. Why would that mean we’d ever even think about handing this weapon over to you?”

“Stubborn, aren’t you. Well, I believe I can convince you to part with it,” Elle continued, still smirking. “Perhaps you might consider...a trade?” With a snap of her fingers, Elle was joined by three other people; two were dressed in hooded cloaks which covered their faces and held the arms of the third, who was blindfolded, bound, and gagged, but instantly recognizable. 

Linkara’s eyes widened in horror. “Harvey!” Before he could grab his Magic Gun, before Linksano or 90s Kid could grab their weapons, even before Ninja could leap into action, Elle snapped her fingers again and the three vanished completely.

“Don’t worry, he’s not hurt…yet,” Elle said, her eyes flashing with ice. “Although he might be a bit chilly. You see, I decided not to dry his clothes after pulling him out of that freezing cold water, so the old fellow might soon learn what it means to be a real ‘cool cat’.” 

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” Linkara snarled, his rage threatening to overwhelm him. “Are you trying to kill him? You already have him captured, isn’t that enough?!”

“I wonder how long it takes for hypothermia to set in,” Elle said, her smirk deepening. “Maybe an hour? Hmm, yes, that sounds right. In that case, I’ll give you an hour to decide what’s more important to you: the quill or that old man. When you have made your decision, return to the child’s trial to make the trade. If you don’t show…” Elle’s face went blank, save her eyes, which filled with darkness. “Then I won’t show any mercy. I shall be waiting.”

With another snap of her fingers, she was gone, leaving the four men to stare at each other miserably.

“D-Dad,” 90s Kid whispered, too quiet to be heard even by Ninja’s ears. 

Linkara continued staring at the spot where he’d seen Harvey held hostage, bound and gagged and completely helpless. Harvey had to be weak after almost drowning and crawling through a ceiling, and now he must be freezing, but what if that wasn’t the extent of his suffering? What if the gag was preventing him from catching his breath properly? What if he had inhaled water and was unable to expel it from his lungs? What if Elle and her minions were doing something horrible to him right now? Linkara’s skin went white. He couldn’t bear the thought of Harvey dying, he couldn’t let this happen to him, the mission be damned. 

“W-we have to give it to her.” he stammered, causing the others to stare at him. 

“What are you saying, Linkara?” Linksano asked incredulously. “Are you seriously going to hand that over after everything we’ve just gone through?”

“We-we can’t lose him,” Linkara said desperately, his knees shaking. “I can’t lose him. I’m going to give them the quill.”

“Don’t you dare!” 90s Kid shouted, grabbing Linkara and turning him around to face him. Linkara stared back in shock. “We did not just go through hell to have you give up now, Linkara! I’ll never forgive you if you do! I did not go through all of this for nothing! Remember what you asked me before: is Harvey’s life more important than everybody else’s in the world?!”

“That-that’s not fair!” Linkara cried pitifully. He could already hear those words echoing through his head from when he’d first said them to 90s Kid what seemed like an eternity ago. 

“I know it’s not fair, but it’s true!” 90s Kid cried, tears starting to trickle down his cheeks. “I had to choose between this mission and Dan and I did it because I knew doing this would save Dan! I knew it would save everyone! I love Harvey just like you do, but we c-can’t...we can’t turn our backs on everyone…Harvey-dude would never w-want that...”

“He’s right,” Linksano said, his voice solemn. “You can’t just give this weapon to those most likely villainous people and risk everyone’s lives.”

*It is an impossible choice, Linkara, but it is one we’ve all made. Can you do the same?* 

Linkara looked down, his face heating up as more tears prickled at his eyes. He understood now. This is what he’d put them all through by asking them to come on this mission and now, when it came down to it, he was wavering when he had to do the same. But this was what being a hero meant, making the impossible choices and saving the most people possible. Harvey would want it to be this way, and no matter how much Linkara protested, he knew it to be true. “I...I’m sorry,” he whispered, wiping his eyes. “I’m sorry for what I’ve done...what I’ve asked of you all without even realizing how much it truly mattered…”

Linkara fell quiet when 90s Kid pulled him into a hug. “It’s okay, dude. We can talk about it later, but right now, we have to make our awesome plan.”

“W-what?” Linkara looked up and wiped his eyes before peering at the teen in confusion. “But I thought you said-”

*Do you really expect us to give up that easily?* Ninja shot Linkara a smile that radiated warmth even through his mask. 

“Of course not,” Linksano said, clapping his hands together. “If some evil magical team captures our companion and tries to force our hand, we don’t just roll over like trained dogs – we fight back!”

Linkara unleashed a shaky smile before he pulled every member of his team into a quick hug. “I should know by now never to doubt you guys. Okay, let’s put our heads together and come up with a plan. We only have an hour, but I’d like to make it less, since I want to get Harvey out of those wet clothes as soon as possible.”

The four started murmuring together, each offering and then rejecting different ideas as they searched for one that would work. 90s Kid wanted badly to help, but he was the least skilled when it came to devising plans, so he was mostly left listening to the others. As he churned ideas around in his brain, trying to come up with one that sounded decent, he slipped his hand into his pocket and pulled out the Golden Snitch, making a game of releasing it and then catching it before it flew more than a foot away. 90s Kid always came up with his best ideas when he was doing something else, like skateboarding or drawing in his sketchbook, so he hoped this activity would be similarly inspiring.

Ninja was the first to notice his game. *90s Kid, what are you doing?*

“Huh? Oh, nothing, just catching this thing,” 90s Kid muttered as he held up the Snitch between two fingers.

“Didn’t that come from your trial?” Linksano wondered. “I didn’t realize you could remove items from the trials and bring them out here.”

“I guess we can,” Linkara said with a shrug. “It’s not like it really matters, since I probably could have used my magic to make one of those for 90s Kid back home anyway.”

“No, I think it does matter.” They looked to Linksano in surprise while the scientist calculated silently for a moment. “Yes, I think it matters quite a bit, since I now have an idea that I believe will work. It will require the use of your special skills, Linkara, but I have confidence that you will not let us down.”

As Linkara leaned in close so that Linksano could explain his plan, Ninja and 90s Kid checked their weapons and their courage. There was one final battle to be fought before they could finally return to the place they had all been dreaming of, and this was one battle they all refused to lose.


	12. Chapter 12

Linkara turned to each of his friends, looking serious and slightly scared, but doing his best to exude confidence.

“Okay. Does everyone understand the plan?”

“Affirmative.”

*Yes, Linkara.* 

“For sure, man.”

Linkara nodded and clamped the lid down on the mystical box they’d received half an hour ago before standing up straight, his determination and jaw unwavering. “Then let’s go save Harvey.”

The others straightened up as well and soon the four started to walk down the white hallway in the opposite direction from which they’d walked before, quietly but confidently. Ninja’s senses were heightened to their peak; 90s Kid’s weapons were fully powered and ready for action; Linksano’s medical kit was prepared to tackle any injury which might befall his companions, and Linkara was keeping a hand close to the pocket where he stored the Magic Gun. He truly hoped that he would not have to rely on her power to resolve this situation, but at this point Linkara was prepared to do whatever it took. 

It wasn’t long before the golden letters of the one-time password to the Gryffindor common room appeared before 90s Kid. He nodded to the others and opened the door, revealing the familiar grassy Quidditch field with its pointy towers and tall hooped poles. Linkara had intended to keep his determined expression throughout the entirety of this meeting, but once he realized that a flailing lounge singer was tied to the tallest Quidditch hoop, his confidence was dashed instantly.

“Harvey!” Linkara stared up in horror at the older man who was now un-blindfolded, but still gagged and very tightly bound to the uppermost part of the goalpost. Harvey was sweating terribly, his skin paler than it had ever been before, and he was keeping his eyes tightly shut as he tried to avoid looking down at the world spread out so far below him. He couldn’t keep his body from trembling, his soaking clothes no doubt making him even more uncomfortable. All four members of the team found themselves staring up at him in dismay. 

“Oh dude, he’s up so high!” 90s Kid cried, looking almost as terrified as Linkara did. “We have to get him down!”

“He’ll be released in due time.”

Linkara uttered a soft growl when he heard her voice from behind him, and his fingers tightened around the quill case. He whirled around to face Elle, his previous determination returning, and said through grit teeth, “Give Harvey back. Right now.”

Elle looked up at Harvey and laughed, as though his suffering caused her amusement. “He doesn’t look as though he’s having a very fun time. If you want his suffering to end, you’ll hand over what I desire post haste.” 

Linkara stared at Elle, peering as deeply into her eyes as he could, trying to reason with her. “You have to understand that we’ve gone through hell trying to get this artifact. We’ve done things that have traumatized us and caused us immeasurable pain. All we want is to go home and recover from all the crap this damn world has put us through.”

“We don’t want Harvey to hurt anymore, he means so much to us,” 90s Kid begged. “Can’t you see that he’s totally cold and scared? Please, give him back to us!”

“Your words are touching, but the only thing I care about is that quill,” Elle replied, her eyes filling with a darkness that caused Linkara to recoil from her gaze. “I’m the one who has visited this wretched place time and time again, doing whatever was necessary to obtain the quill, but time and time again, it’s eluded my grasp. I don’t understand why, not when I’m the one who’s brought so many with me as offerings for every miserable trial this world throws at me – why did it reveal itself to you and not me?” Elle’s mask of ice melted away as a fiery rage twisted her features. “I’m the only one fit to be the true owner of that quill! Release it from your filthy hands! You don’t even understand this world, or the magic required to navigate it, let alone what that weapon is capable of!”

90s Kid let out a soft whimper, taking a step backwards, and in an instant, Elle’s rage was gone, the mask of cool composure sliding back into place. She offered Linkara another hollow smile. “So then, if you’d like to have Grandpa back unharmed, you’ll hand my quill over. Unless you’d like me to undo his binds and watch as he plunges to his demise.” Elle snapped her fingers and the ropes around the singer loosened slightly, causing Harvey to slowly slide down the pole, his eyes growing wide with fear. 

“N-no!” 90s Kid cried, and Linkara hung his head, clenching his hands so tightly against the box that his fingers grew white.

“After all we’ve gone through to get this...” Linkara sighed and nodded his head in surrender. “Fine, it’s yours.”

“Nnnn! Mmmf! Nnnn!”

Muffled screams rained down from high above, coupled with pitiful shakes of Harvey’s head, but Linkara did his best to ignore them.

“I’m sorry, Harvey,” he murmured, holding out the box in defeat. “But a world without you just isn’t worth saving...”

Elle chuckled darkly as she accepted the box, clutching it tightly with her long, painted nails. “I knew your feelings for your teammates would be your undoing. The strongest teams are created by those willing to make sacrifices for the greater good.”

“Do you honestly think a lecture is what we need right now?” Linksano snapped, staring venomously at the woman. 

“I can think of a number of things you need, but I’ll spare you for now.” Elle traced her fingers over the cool wood of the case before turning her back to the team, flaunting how confident she felt in their lack of ability to take action against her. “Go ahead; rescue the poor old fool before his fear causes him to become incontinent as well as nauseous.”

90s Kid snarled and clenched his hands, wanting nothing more than to aim his BFG at her, but a quick glance from Linkara caused him instead to swallow his anger and nod. He understood very well what they needed to do. 

*So, you will release Harvey?* Ninja asked. 

Somehow, Elle saw his card without turning around. “There are a number of brooms lying about this place. Go ahead and fly up to him if you want. Or leave him. I really don’t care.”

Linkara once again resisted the urge to pull out his trusted partner, and instead reached down to the ground, grabbing a shiny Firebolt. “Come on, guys. We can’t leave Harvey any longer.” The others nodded and soon were following Linkara through the air on broomsticks of their own as they headed toward the highest goalpost. 

Unfortunately they were all forced to scatter from their single-file formation once an assortment of items started to fly at them from every direction. Instead of being tormented by Bludgers visible only to 90s Kid, this time the four were attacked by highly visible, and highly dangerous, items. 90s Kid yelped as a bullet grazed his shoulder, while Linksano squealed and swooped wildly to avoid being hit by several daggers. Ninja at once went to work sending out kunai and shuriken to disrupt the flights of the attacking weapons, while Linkara cursed and cast as many shielding spells as he could remember. 

“Damn it all! I thought you said we could have Harvey if we traded!” he cried out to Elle angrily. 

“Of course, he’s all yours!” Elle cried, laughing loudly at their screams. “I just thought this type of rescue attempt would be much more fun!”

“Don’t let any of this stop you! We have to get to Harvey!” Linkara shouted. “Stay close to me so I can shield you!” Linkara continued shouting out magic spells to protect them as they flew, while Ninja wielded every weapon he had in his armory. 

90s Kid’s skillful flying caused him to be the first one to reach Harvey and he zoomed behind him to start untying his ropes. “Don’t worry, Dad, I’ve got you,” he murmured, hoping to reassure Harvey that things would be alright. 

Linkara approached next, welcoming Harvey’s heavy, wet, trembling body onto his broomstick and into his arms. Harvey was looking much the worse for wear as he clung to Linkara for dear life, his body cold and clothes still dripping water. 

“How c-c-c-could you do that, K-K-Kid?” he asked between chattering teeth. Though his eyes held exhaustion, disappointment and dismay also lurked within. “You s-should have left m-m-me. What happened to p-p-putting the m-mission first? To p-putting the world first?”

Linkara shot him a confident smile, his arms tightening around Harvey’s body. “Do you really think I’d betray the whole world that easily, Harvey? You’ve forgotten one thing about me: even though I’m a hero, I’m not above fighting dirty.”

An ear-piercing shriek suddenly filled the sky, causing the team to look down. They watched as Elle threw off her cloak, revealing bare arms that were now covered in blood, words carved deep into her flesh. 90s Kid wore a smile of grim pleasure as she started howling at them. 

“You’d better not tell lies.”

”Damn it! What is this?” Elle howled, clutching at her bleeding wounds desperately. “Come here!” She snapped and one of her hooded minions appeared, seemingly confused as the quill and a notepad were thrust into his hands. “Write something with this! If there is a protective spell on it, I need to see how it works!”

The minion reluctantly started writing with the quill before he hissed and dropped it to the ground, grabbing at the back of his now-bleeding hand. Elle roared and shot a bolt of black lightning from her hand directly at the quill, disintegrating it instantly, before turning her fury-filled face towards the team.

“What is this?! What have you done to me?! Where is the real quill?!”

It was Linkara’s turn to laugh darkly this time. “Well, Elle, I might just be a crappy novice when it comes to magic, but illusion spells are actually pretty easy to pull off. And I think I did a damn good job casting one on that torture quill from 90s Kid’s trial. Or maybe the one I cast on 90s Kid himself was better, since it allowed him to slip through this room without the high and mighty sorceress noticing a thing,” he added, chuckling when Elle let out another howl of rage.

“You’re right, I shouldn’t be so modest – both of those spells were amazing! Now, as for your last question…” Linkara opened his coat and touched the pocket where normally he stored his Magic Gun, but presently was storing something much more important. “I was going to hand the quill over to you fair and square, but then I thought that this type of deception would be much more fun!”

“Get them!” Elle shrieked, snapping her fingers so many times they began to emit smoke. A cascade of hooded figures appeared before her, bowed, and then took flight, not one needing a broomstick to stay aloft.

“Everyone touch some part of me!” Linkara barked, outstretching his arms so that the others could comply with his wishes. 

“I-I never shoulda doubted you, Kid,” Harvey muttered, pressing his face against Linkara’s shoulder as he sagged against his broad back. 

Linkara let out a small grin before he snapped, “Everyone holding on tight?”

“Yeah!”

*Affirmative.* 

“For Tesla’s sake, get us out of here!”

Linkara nodded and quickly spoke the words that he’d first spoken what seemed to be a lifetime ago. The five men were enveloped in a bright, golden light before they vanished from the Aisles of Write at last.

\-----

Ted rang the doorbell to Linkara’s apartment and only had to wait ten seconds before it was flung open and he was pulled into a tight embrace by Boffo. 

“Oof!” Ted cried out in surprise before he tentatively hugged the clown back. “G-greetings my friend. I am also h-happy to see you...and also hoping to breathe again sometime soon.”

Boffo quickly pulled back and honked an apology but Ted smiled and brushed it off. He knew that Boffo craved touch as comfort and honestly Ted did as well, so he didn’t mind indulging him in this time of need. 

_Please come in, Ted!_

“I certainly will! I-oh.” Ted looked more closely at Boffo’s clown nose, which was for some reason colored bright blue instead of red. “I hope you haven’t been feeling sad lately, Boffo,” he said, feeling a touch concerned.

 _Sad?_ Boffo looked puzzled for a moment until he realized that Ted was staring at his nose. _Oh. No, I’m not sad, Ted. I simply switched my nose out for a different one to celebrate April Fool’s Day._ He explained calmly.

“I see. How, um, comedic of you,” Ted replied, honestly not sure what to make of this joke.

 _Thanks._ Boffo failed to notice Ted’s awkwardness and calmly led him into the living room.

“Greetings, Dan!” Ted said when he spotted the man. “I hope you’re ready for movie night because I brought some Kung-Fu classics, all of which happen to be from the 80s!”

Dan, who was still quite pale and much thinner than he’d been before 90s Kid left, looked up at Ted with a small smile. “Well hello, my friend. I’m glad to see you’re doing well. Thanks for bringing the movies tonight. I made some refreshments if you’re hungry.” Dan lifted a plate of churros from the coffee table and offered it to Ted. “I’ve run out of things to make from my regular cookbook, so Dolly bought me an international one.”

Ted took a bite of one and smiled. “Delicious. You are truly talented, Dan.”

Dan offered a weak smile in return and nibbled on a churro as well, soon coating his lips in white powder that he was slow to lick off. “Thanks, my friend. Tomorrow, I’m going to try baumkuchen.”

 _I’m sure it will be as delicious as these churros are._ Boffo said as he sat down on the couch beside the other man and reached for one as well. Ted observed the two as they silently munched their churros, noting that they both still seemed rather subdued, and felt the desire to help his friends feel better grow stronger within him.

Ted knew that Dan and Boffo were still doing the best they could to deal with their loneliness, though there had been a few rough patches here and there. Dan had started going to NA meetings again, but he still sometimes called Ted on his cell phone in the middle of the night, needing to be reassured that it couldn’t be much longer until 90s Kid was home, since he had never been apart from him this long before. It usually took about an hour to get Dan settled down, but at least Ted was sure that Dan wasn’t sneaking off to buy drugs again, which was a very good sign. 

Boffo was putting on the braver face, as he always did, but Ted noticed times where Boffo needed to excuse himself from the room abruptly whenever he brought up Linksano’s name (and the poor thing mentioned his name quite often). When he came back, Boffo was always smiling, but Ted could see the added makeup around his eyes. At least Boffo still ate well and worked out regularly, so he appeared outwardly healthy if nothing else. 

As for Ted, he was doing much better after receiving the message from Ninja. Being reminded of Ninja’s love and the fact that he was safe helped him rest easier than he had been since the dancer’s departure, and sometimes if he focused really hard, he could feel Ninja’s strong arms around him as he laid in bed. This always gave Ted an added boost of confidence and pep, and so he decided to use his positive energy to cheer up his friends, since he didn’t think he could take the strained, brittle smiles of Boffo and Dan any longer. 

“Actually, we seem to have been watching many movies lately,” Ted said, placing the VHS boxes down. “What do you say we play a game? That would be a fun way to spend an afternoon, don’t you think?”

“A game?” Dan repeated, looking surprised. “I haven’t played any games since Kid left...I don’t even know if I remember the rules to anything.” He gave a short, rough laugh that sounded odd, but Ted would not be rebuffed so easily. 

“Well, that won’t do at all, Dan. What will Kid say when he comes home and wants to engage you in a round of _Punch-Out!!_ one evening?”

Dan suddenly looked distraught. “Do you think Kid will be mad? I would never want to make him mad, or-or sad, not ever!”

“No, no of course not,” Ted quickly corrected, mentally kicking himself for forgetting how fragile Dan was. “90s Kid would never be mad or sad because of you, Dan! But he’d certainly have a lot more fun if your skills were sharp enough to give him a real challenge, don’t you think?”

“Oh.” Dan nodded, taking Ted’s words to heart. “You’re right. I want Kid to have fun with me w-when he comes back. Yeah. Yeah, you’re right, you’re right.” Dan smiled then, a truly warm smile this time. “So, what should we play, Ted?”

“Why don’t we ask Boffo?” Ted suggested, turning toward the clown then. “You always know lots of fun games to play with the kids at the hospital, right?”

Boffo couldn’t help looking happier as he thought of the children he loved so dearly. _Yes, we do have fun together. I’m not sure if either of you would enjoy our games though..._

“Oh, I don’t think that’s true at all,” Ted continued, placing a hand on Boffo’s shoulder and squeezing it gently. “You’re a creative and fun-loving guy, Boffo. You’re also better at figuring out what we need more than we are sometimes,” he admitted with a chuckle. “So please, Boffo, think about what kind of game Dan and I need to play tonight.”

Boffo looked surprised by these words, but his cheeks were slightly tinted red with happiness, letting Ted know that he’d been successful at last. _Well, let’s see...oh, I know. Sometimes, when Pollo and I are at the base by ourselves, we pretend we run a detective agency._ Boffo’s cheeks tinted a bit darker but he was smiling widely now. _I know it sounds a bit silly to think of a clown and a robot as detectives-_

“Silly? Are you kidding?” Dan cut in. “That sounds like the premise for the best buddy cop show ever! Oh, after _Miami Vice_ of course.”

 _Really?_ Boffo asked, and when Dan nodded, he pulled the other man into a hug as well.

Ted was rather confused at Boffo’s choice of game, as he was not really a fan of buddy cop shows, but it was enough to get the scared puppy dog look out of both their eyes for once, so Ted was going to indulge them as much as he could. “Well then, where is your robot partner?”

“Right here,” Pollo announced, floating into the room wearing a suit and tie and makeshift detective’s badge, which Ted tried very hard not to find hilarious. Boffo reached into his coat and pulled out a badge as well, which upon closer inspection read: _Boffo and Pollo – Detectives and Accountants at Large._

 _We’ll need to make badges for you two as well; you can be our honorary agents._ Boffo honked, already feeling better now that he was getting into one of his favorite games. 

“I wish I’d brought my favorite side holster,” Dan asked, remembering his full Sonny Crockett costume at Dolly’s house. “Ooh, but before we make badges, there’s a special skill that all agents should know, Boffo.”

 _What is that?_ Boffo asked, instantly alert and pleased to see Dan getting into the game to this degree. 

“Follow me!” Dan surprised them by exiting the apartment and going down the stairs that led to the parking lot. Boffo, Pollo, and Ted trailed along behind him, watching as Dan walked over to his car. “Now watch this!” Dan backed up before charging at his car, jumping up, and smoothly gliding over the hood. Unfortunately his landing wasn’t quite as smooth and he stumbled a bit across the blacktop. “Whoa, I might be a little out of practice,” he murmured, straightening his glasses and feeling a tiny bit embarrassed about having just done that. Dan’s discomfiture faded quickly though when he saw Boffo jumping up and down, clapping joyfully. 

_That was wonderful! Let me try!_

As Boffo and Dan spent time sliding across the top of his car and giggling like children, Pollo went to work creating the new badges for the honorary detectives, and Ted set off to hide some suspicious pieces of evidence for the detectives to find once the investigation began. Even though he felt a bit foolish climbing trees to plant false moustaches and digging holes to bury pieces of jewelry, Ted also felt heartened by the excited shouts and honks of his companions. If he had to endure a little dirt on his robes or a few knee burns to keep everyone smiling until their loved ones returned, then Ted would become the best martial artist/honorary detective the world had ever seen.

While the four were busy running around outside, Nimue sent out an alert signal from inside the base.

“Warning: a transmission will occur inside this apartment building within the next twenty-four hours. Preparations for the acceptance of this transmission will now begin.”


	13. Chapter 13

When the five materialized once again, they collapsed onto the floor of their living room, even Ninja this time, who was far too exhausted to do much of anything anymore. Harvey gasped as his back collided with the hardwood floor and he started coughing, rolling onto his side as he fought desperately to breathe. Linkara turned anguished eyes on his boyfriend, realizing just how much damage his trial had done.

“Oh God, Harvey. It’s okay, babe, we’re home now. 90s Kid, help me get him into the bathroom! Ninja, get me some warm clothes and blankets! Linksano, scan him quickly and find out what’s wrong with him!”

Everyone raced to obey Linkara’s orders while Pollo floated into the room. “I’m pleased to see you have all arrived home safely.”

Linkara gave him as happy a smile as possible, considering the situation. “Glad to see you in one piece, Pollo, not to mention the apartment. I trust you had no trouble looking after things with Nimue and Boffo while we were gone. However, as you can see, not all of us are in the best condition, so we don’t have much time to socialize right now.”

“I understand. Nimue and I will make sure to continue monitoring the base so that you can rest.”

“Information,” Nimue chimed in from the ceiling. “This unit is also pleased to see that the team has returned safely and will aid Pollo in making sure that the base remains secure until you have recovered.” A few Cybermats made a beeline to Linkara’s sides and rubbed gratefully against his shins like needy cats who had been missing their owner.

“Thanks, guys. I really appreciate that.” Linkara told them gratefully, feeling some of his strength return thanks to their warm greetings.

Upstairs, Ninja was rooting through Harvey’s dresser drawers to find his pajamas, and was so focused on his task that he failed to notice someone teleporting into the hallway. That someone did not fail to notice his presence, however.

 _Who’s there?_ A quivering horn honked. Ninja looked behind him to find Boffo nervously poking his head inside Harvey’s room. He spun around fully to make himself known and Boffo gasped in shock. _Ninja! You’re home! You’re okay! Thank goodness!_ Boffo threw himself at his friend, clinging to Ninja tightly as his heart started to grow so full he felt it might burst.

Ninja hugged him back, feeling a hole that had formed in his chest start to fill in again. *You do not know how good it is to see you, Boffo.* Ninja had never hugged Boffo so tightly before, and it caused the clown as much joy as it did worry. 

_Are the others alright? Did they make it home with you?_ He pulled back to ask, his eyes desperate. _Nimue said it would be within twenty-four hours, but she didn’t have any other details._

Ninja smiled. *Everyone is downstairs. Follow me.* Boffo’s smile widened and he followed after Ninja eagerly as they headed back downstairs.

“Thanks, Ninja,” Linkara replied in a grateful tone before disappearing back into the bathroom. Minutes later he and 90s Kid were carrying Harvey out toward the couch, the singer now dressed in warm, dry clothing and wrapped in blankets. 

Linksano was already sitting there with his medical bag, and he set right to work examining Harvey. After a quick scan, Linksano used a few other tools on Harvey, before he shook his head and removed his stethoscope. “I don’t need to examine you much to know that the prolonged exposure to the freezing water has taken its toll, I’m afraid. I wouldn’t be surprised if you had to remain bedridden for at least a week.”

“What’s the d-d-d-downside, D-D-Doc?” Harvey got out through chattering teeth, which caused Linkara to laugh in spite of himself. Linksano rolled his eyes, ready to launch into what was surely a long lecture about taking illnesses lightly, when he spotted a flash of rainbow colors with his peripheral vision. He turned instantly and realized that Boffo was standing less than a foot away from him, watching him with one of the most joyful expressions ever known to humankind.

_Oscar!_

“Boffo!” Linksano’s own expression of pure happiness came close to matching Boffo’s and he rushed to embrace the clown as tightly as he could, before lifting him into the air and twirling him around. Boffo’s eyes sparkled with delight and he laughed, which caused Linksano to laugh as well, not his usual maniacal cackle but a soft, lilting laugh filled with elation and love. It was Boffo’s favorite sound in the world and his whole body flooded with a light and warmth that he’d been missing for so very long. “You don’t know how much I’ve longed to do this,” Linksano murmured once he’d set Boffo down and pulled him close once again. “You don’t know how much I’ve...I’ve missed you...” His voice started to waver as all the emotions he’d struggled to keep at bay threatened to spill out. 

_I know, Oscar._ Boffo signed against his back. _I’ve felt the same longing and loneliness you have these past three months...Oscar, I love you! I love you so much!_ Without even thinking about who might be watching, Boffo leaned forward and kissed Linksano eagerly, his arms still holding tightly to the scientist’s torso as if he feared Linksano might disappear again before his eyes.

Linksano was too exhausted and exuberant to feel embarrassed, so he kissed Boffo back just as eagerly before they pulled apart, breathless and blushing. “Oh my dear,” Linksano murmured as he stroked Boffo’s cheek. “I can’t believe this is real...how could I have been separated from you for three months?”

“Three months?!” 90s Kid cried, looking shocked. “Is that how long we were gone?!”

Linksano finally remembered that he was in the midst of his team, and he turned back to them with an even redder face. “Oh, um, yes. I was l-looking after Finevoice, wasn’t I? Apologies, Boffo, but-”

 _I understand, Oscar._ Boffo signed as he turned to 90s Kid as well. _Yes, 90s Kid, you all have been gone for around three months. Did it not feel like that to you?_

“No way, dude!” 90s Kid said, shaking his head for emphasis. “None of us could tell how long we were stuck in that place! I thought it was like a day or two! Wow, so it was three months...” 90s Kid’s sudden look of worry caused Boffo to speak quickly. 

_Dan is alright, 90s Kid. It has been a rough time for him as it has been for all of us, but I promise you he’s okay. In fact, he’s upstairs in your room now._

“Dan’s here?!” 90s Kid instantly leapt to his feet before he paused, looking down at Harvey on the couch. “Oh, um, I-”

“It’s okay, Junior,” Harvey said with a small smile. “I’m gonna be just fine now that we’re home safe and sound, so you go on and see Crockett. I know you’ve been missing him and that he’s been missing you, so go show him how brave and strong a cat you really are.”

90s Kid beamed at him before looking to Linkara, wanting further confirmation.

“After proving your courage, loyalty, and intelligence by protecting this team and this planet, I fully release you from duty, 90s Kid.” Linkara smiled as his words seemed to temporarily stun the teen, before he chuckled when 90s Kid rushed to embrace him.

“Thank you, Linkara!” 90s Kid also shared a quick hug of thanks with Boffo. “And thank you for looking out for Dan. I knew I could count on you. See you all later!” While 90s Kid then bolted up the stairs and into his bedroom, Linksano continued his examination of Harvey, while Boffo stuck close to his side, grasping his sleeve every so often to reassure himself that Linksano was really there.

Once Linksano had finished his examination of Harvey, the singer was given hot soup to drink and left to rest on the couch in a warm nest of blankets. 

“His health is not in dire condition, but the effects of remaining in those soaking wet clothes for so long will need to be remedied,” Linksano informed the others. “After a few days of bedrest and these precautionary antibiotics, he should be back to his usual self.”

Linksano had also finished performing health scans on the rest of the team, minus 90s Kid, but since he’d found no physical signs of injury or illness, other than the normal fatigue and hunger normally caused by the stress of missions, he’d decided to leave the teenager be for now. “I am happy to report that we are all sufficiently healthy,” Linksano announced as he put his medical bag away. 

_I am very happy to hear you report that as well._ Boffo honked before gently pulling on Linksano’s arm, so that the scientist could join him on the comfortable love seat.

Ninja nodded to Linksano. *Thank you for taking me into your care. I am very pleased to know that we have all arrived back here in one piece.* Ninja turned to Linkara then, allowing their leader to see how wide and desperate his eyes now looked. *If this mission is officially over, I would like to request some time off. I don’t know how long I will be gone, but it will not be more than a week, if that is to your satisfaction.*

Linkara had never seen Ninja look at him in such a manner before, and he realized then that Ninja must have been fighting to hold back quite a lot of emotions, so he nodded. “Of course, that’s fine. I declare this mission officially over and order all participants to take whatever time off they need. You’re free to go, Ninja.” Ninja bowed gratefully to Linkara before he shared one final look with Boffo, mentally promising the clown that he would be back soon to spend time with him, before he vanished in a puff of smoke. 

Linkara let out a large yawn at that moment and suddenly realized just how heavy his eyelids felt. “Well, now that this is taken care of, why don’t we all get some rest? I for one am looking forward to sleeping in an actual bed for the first time in three months, apparently. What about you, Harvey?”

“If I had the option to wrap myself in satin sheets and goose down pillows for a year, I’d do it.” Harvey replied, drawing a round of laughter from the others.

“What about the quill, Linkara?” Linksano asked, glancing to where it was still hidden in his pocket. “Weren’t you planning to test it out once we’d returned?”

“Oh, right. Pollo! Can you bring me an empty take-out carton?”

“Are you serious?” Linksano asked in shock as Linkara tucked the clear yet colorful feather into a box that had previously been used for storing egg rolls.

“Well, would you think to look for what might be the most dangerous weapon in the world in a container of Chinese food?”

“I…suppose not.” Linksano reluctantly agreed.

“So it’s settled, then.” Linkara handed the carton to Pollo. “Can you take this to the most secure section of Comicron-1? The team and I will be ready to figure out how it works after we’ve had a few days off.”

“That’s our leader for you,” Linksano muttered, shaking his head in slight disbelief. He watched Linkara help Harvey stand and hobble up the stairs, the singer leaning against Linkara every so often. “I suppose this is good night then,” Linksano said, with a nod to the pair. “Boffo and I shall see you in the morning.”

“I can’t thank you enough for coming with me, Linksano.” Linkara looked down from the bannister at the scientist and clown, his expression full of appreciation and slight sadness. “I know I didn’t think enough about what you were giving up...you and Ninja and 90s Kid...but I promise it won’t be like that again. I’m really sorry, Linksano.”

“Apology accepted, Linkara.” Linksano said, his arms wrapped tightly around Boffo. Linkara knew Linksano could only speak for himself and not the others, but he hoped that in time he’d be able to make up with all of them for his hurtful actions and words.

\-----

Ted sighed softly to himself as he looked around his apartment, which was feeling more and more empty by the day. He had been doing everything he could to keep busy as he waited for Ninja to return, such as cleaning his apartment until it was spotless, reading every book he had on his shelf, watching movie after movie until his VCR nearly started overheating. Now it was approaching dinner time and he needed to figure out what to do. Ted had a few more packs of ramen in his cabinets, or he could spend his laundry money on a more substantial meal prepared down the street. 

One of the things he missed most about Ninja was his delicious cuisine. Ted’s bottomless appetite was growing even larger thanks to working during the day, training in the evenings, and helping Boffo and Dan in his spare time, and Ninja’s meals would sure hit the spot most days. Unfortunately Ted was not very skilled when it came to cooking, and sometimes he would collapse into bed at night without having eaten more than a sandwich or a cup of noodles all day.

As Ted continued to ponder what he wanted to do for dinner, he saw a flash of black on the ceiling, causing his breath to catch in his throat. Were his eyes playing tricks on him again, or could it really be...? 

“H-Hello?” he called out, before whirling around as he watched a figure drop down and stand tall before him. Ted’s face lit up with joy and relief, and his body started trembling. “Ninja! You...you’re really here! I can’t believe I’m really seeing you again! I know Nimue said you’d be home today, but I thought you’d still need to debrief from the mission or spend some time on your own before coming to see me. N-not that I didn’t want to see you, because of course I did! I’ve missed you so much!”

Ted lunged at Ninja then and clung tightly to him, nearly dissolving completely into tears, but then he remembered Ninja’s words about being strong and controlling themselves when necessary. “S-sorry,” Ted mumbled, trying to hold his emotions in check as he took a step back. “It’s just been quite a long time since I’ve seen you, and-”

Ted stopped abruptly when Ninja grabbed him and pulled him back into his arms, squeezing him tighter than he ever had before. *Don’t. Please.* Ninja pleaded, his face buried in Ted’s neck. *I need this. I...I need you, Ted.*

“Ninja? Are you okay?” Ted was shocked not only by Ninja’s words, but by how the dancer seemed to be clinging to him as if he feared Ted might somehow escape from his grasp. “What happened?” he asked, his worry only growing when Ninja’s grip around him grew stronger. “Is it the mission? Did it...did it not go well?” Ted asked softly, wondering if perhaps a tragedy had befallen the team somehow.

*No, it was a success. Everyone came home safely and we achieved our goal* Ninja informed him before a small, whimpering sound slipped past his lips. 

Ted’s eyes went wide and his mouth dropped open when he saw that tears were falling from his boyfriend’s eyes. “Ninja-”

*Ted, I’m so sorry!* Ninja continued to silently weep and cling tightly to Ted, while the scrawl on his notecards grew messy and harder to read. *I’m sorry for every time I’ve treated you badly, for every time I’ve hurt you, every time I’ve not been there when you needed me! Not when the truth is that I need you, Ted! I need you and I love you and I’m sorry...I’m so sorry...please forgive me...* Another whimper slipped past his lips, but before Ted could react, Ninja lifted the man into his arms and carried him into the bedroom at full speed, making sure to pepper Ted’s face and neck with salty kisses the entire way. 

The next thing Ted knew, they were on his bed, and Ninja was still giving him kiss after kiss, tears flowing freely from his eyes. Ted was astounded and more than a little worried, since he’d never seen Ninja break down in tears like this before. He had seen him cry, but not like this, not like his heart was breaking. “Ninja, it’s...it’s okay,” he tried to comfort, rubbing the man’s back and returning the tight embrace. “You have no reason to be sorry. I know that you’re very dedicated to your work and that-”

*You d-don’t understand, Ted.* Ninja held up, looking ashamed. *Ever since I was a child, I have trained myself to hide my emotions and not let them be seen, even in times of stress. I truly was upset about having to leave you, Ted, but I could not show you that and risk not being able to perform my duty...but that is still no excuse for how cold I was to you.* 

More tears filled Ninja’s eyes and spilled over, looking down in shame. *You deserve so much better than someone like this, who claims to be strong and can somehow be so weak...someone who cannot do anything but let people suffer...* The memories of horrific screams and badly burned bodies were creeping into his mind again, causing Ninja’s insides to churn. *I have failed myself...failed you...failed everyone...*

“You haven’t failed me!” Ted insisted, utterly perplexed about most of Ninja’s actions but definitely certain about this one simple fact. “You’ve never failed me, Ninja! I understand that you needed to focus on your mission before and that’s why you were more closed off than usual. It bothered me a little, sure,” he admitted, before realizing that this caused Ninja to wince as if he were in pain. “B-but that doesn’t mean I think you failed me! And I don’t want anyone better because there isn’t anyone better than you, Ninja! You aren’t weak and you always do your best to protect and help everyone you meet!”

Ted’s confident words did little to help Ninja, as he became more and more engulfed in a tidal wave of death and despair. Memories of the trial mixed in with the horrible scenes of his own childhood flooded his mind and Ninja sobbed harder, pulling away from Ted as he felt the desire to flee start to overwhelm him.

*No...I’ve failed...all my life I’ve failed to save people…I am not worthy of having anything good in my life...I am not worthy of you...so please, Ted...please…please...* 

Ted’s whole face crumpled as he started to cry, his determination at last failing him. “Ninja, please d-don’t say that,” he begged, crawling on his hands and knees so that he could be closer to the man he loved. “Y-you’re really scaring me. Please don’t think like that about yourself. I-I hate seeing you this way. Please, talk to me; tell me what happened to make you feel like this. I-I want to help you, Ninja.”

Ted reached out and grasped the man’s shoulder before pulling him close into a desperate hug. “Let me help you, just as you’ve always helped me. You’ve done everything for me, Ninja. You’ve taught me so much, showed me kindness and love I’d never before experienced, you’ve made me so h-happy...please, Shinobu,” he begged, eyes still leaking. “Let me m-make you f-f-feel as good as I d-do whenever you’re with me. I...I love you so much...you’re such a g-g-good person and y-you don’t deserve to suffer like this...”

Ninja felt Ted’s body shake with sobs and struggled to comprehend his words. How could someone as honest and true as Ted ever love someone like him? 

*This mission was one of the hardest I have ever had to face...* Ninja began, still clinging to Ted like a lifeline. *I have fought so hard for years to atone for my past, Ted...for not being able to save my clan, my family...for letting them all perish in a battle that I was not strong enough to win...* Ninja squeezed his eyes shut. *The trial made me relive it all over again...made me watch them all burn...and I could do nothing. I watched them burn and I did nothing!* Ted clung to Ninja tighter, wishing there was anything that he could do to comfort him right then. *In order to pass my trial, I was ordered to do nothing. I pledged to help others as much as I could, and yet I could do nothing to help them...and that is why I am a wretched being that is completely undeserving of love, Ted.*

Ted pulled back and kissed Ninja between the eyes, wiping the tears from the part of his face that was visible. “You’re wrong, Shinobu,” Ted whispered, caressing his cheek and smiling softly.

“You are so very deserving of love, because you help everyone in your life so much. You suffered through that trial and obeyed those orders so that your team would succeed. You pushed yourself to your limit so the world would be safe,” More tears flowed from Ted’s eyes, though his smile didn’t falter. “And when you’re at home, you’re such a strong, generous, amazing person, Shinobu. You protect your team and use your many talents to train them to be strong enough to protect everyone else. But all of that doesn’t even begin to cover everything you do for me. You help me to become a better person, to be stronger and to be a person that is worthy of you. Even when I was sick...when I was d-dying,” Ted’s voice trembled, since that time had shaken him more than he’d liked to admit. “You didn’t leave my side for even a minute, and you took such good care of me. You fed me, bathed me, pulled me through and made me well again.”

Ninja placed his hand on Ted’s side where the scar from that ordeal was and Ted covered his hand with his own. “You never gave up on me, so I will never give up on you. I’ve kept on living, trying to be a better person, one you will be proud of, because...because I’d do anything for you, Shinobu...”

*Ted.* Ted closed his eyes when Ninja started to wipe his tears with his bare fingers. *You have no need to try and impress me because I am proud of you. I know I should tell you more often than I do, but I honestly am impressed with everything about you, Ted. Your courage and determination inspire my own.* 

Ted let out a shaky breath of thanks as he pulled Ninja into a tight hug. The two enjoyed this quiet embrace for quite some time, each feeling better simply being close to the other, until Ted’s stomach let out a rather loud growl. Ted quickly blushed and rubbed his belly, while Ninja’s expression grew inquisitive. 

*Have you eaten dinner tonight, Ted?* 

“I-I really meant to, but I was just so tired from work...I’m sorry.”

*There’s no need to apologize. I will fix something for you. Stay here and rest until I return.* Ninja quickly wiped the last of the tears from his eyes and stood back up, his depression and pain neutralized now that he had someone to care for again. 

“Thank you, Shinobu,” Ted called out, wiping his own face when he’d left the room, since his mood always improved when Ninja’s did. After cooking a quick meal of soup, rice, and fish, Ninja carried the tray laden with dishes into Ted’s room and sat down beside him on the bed once again. 

*Say ahhh* Ninja instructed as he held up a spoon for Ted to enjoy. Ted blushed dark red as he realized that Ninja wanted to feed him, but he happily accepted the food and felt relieved when Ninja began to smile.

“It’s delicious,” he said, eagerly opening his mouth for more. If this was what Ninja needed to feel better, then Ted would let himself be pampered and spoiled for as long as his boyfriend desired. He obediently ate every delicious mouthful that Ninja gave him until the tray was empty, and both his stomach and his heart felt full again. 

Ninja smiled as he placed the tray on Ted’s nightstand, but he paused when he noticed Ted wiping his eyes again. *What’s wrong? Was something not right?* 

Ted shook his head. “No, it was perfect, just like every other meal you prepare. It tasted so good, and...I’m just so happy you’re back. I missed you so much...” Ted knew that Ninja wished to take care of him in order to feel strong again, and he had spent so many months trying to be strong for others that he was finally starting to let himself be weak again.

With a flurry of movements, Ninja’s clothes and mask were gone, as were Ted’s robes, and Ted relished the feeling of soft skin against skin. He gazed upon Ninja’s bare face for the first time in what felt like ages and kissed him, letting Ninja gently brush the hair back from his eyes. “Please stay tonight, Shinobu,” Ted whispered, gazing into his eyes with quiet desperation. “I couldn’t let you go if I wanted to tonight. Please...”

Ninja kissed Ted to reassure him and gazed down at him with an expression radiating with love and adoration. Ted truly was the man he could trust body and soul. *And I could not leave your side if I tried. I have already told Linkara that I will be taking a vacation for at least a week, and I hope it will not hinder you to have me here until that time is up.* 

Ted’s eyes widened and then they watered with tears again, though they were tears of joy this time. “Nothing would make me happier. I don’t know what I’d do without you, Shinobu. I love you so much.”

*I love you too, Ted. Do not worry about anything anymore, for I am here. Nothing will ever come between us again.*

As their kisses grew deeper, their passion grew wilder, and soon Ted was blissfully welcoming Ninja home in a very tender manner. “I’m not worried, Shinobu...I have you, my faithful protector…you are safe with me too...I love you...”

*Thank you, Ted.* Ninja’s words were steady and neat once more as they were scrawled across his chest. *Thank you for listening to my worries and reassuring me about so many things. I will need more time to fully recover from all that has happened to me, but I know that being with you will replenish my strength and my spirit. You are the most wonderful person I have ever met and I love you with every beat of my heart, Ted.*

Ted’s misty eyes leaked tears once more as he leaned up to kiss Ninja. “I love you too, Shinobu. Welcome home.”


	14. Chapter 14

Once Linkara and Harvey disappeared into Harvey’s room and closed the door, Linksano finally took a moment to appreciate the feeling of Boffo’s warm body pressed against his own as he wrapped his arms around the clown tightly. Boffo smelled like cotton candy and bubblegum, scents that Linksano had missed without even realizing. 

“Let’s go up to our room, dear. We’ve both waited far too long.”

Boffo agreed with this plan and the two raced up the stairs, not pausing for a second until the door was safely closed and locked behind them. Boffo almost instantly pressed his lips to Linksano’s, and the two spent several minutes doing nothing but kissing each other and running their hands along each other’s bodies. Finally they parted to gaze at one another, and Linksano caressed Boffo’s cheek once more. 

“My sweet Boffo, I’ve missed you so much. I’ve been so worried about you...”

Boffo leaned into the touch, closing his eyes. _I’ve missed you too, Oscar. It was so lonely here, but I promise I took care of myself. Dan and Ted were so kind to me and helped me be able to stay strong for you. And I’m...I’m so relieved that you didn’t...that you weren’t..._ Boffo clung to Linksano and buried his face into his shoulder, which prompted Linksano to squeeze him tighter and nuzzle his neck soothingly. 

“It must have been so frightening for you, my dear. I’m so sorry I was away for so long. I promise, nothing has happened to tear me away from you. I would never let anything remove me from your side.”

Boffo pulled back and wiped his eyes, smiling. _I’m just so happy to have you home._ Linksano smiled back and he gently removed Boffo’s nose and wig, watching as Boffo’s gorgeous hair tumbled down to caress the sides of his face, before he pulled the pink jacket from his shoulders.

Linksano undid his shirt buttons and was about to go for his belt when Boffo reached to remove his goggles. “Oh!” Linksano flinched and took a step back and Boffo blinked in surprise. 

_Oscar, did I hurt you? What’s wrong?_ Boffo asked, concerned.

Linksano began trembling, a hand reaching up to touch the protective covering over his eyes. For some reason memories of his trial began flooding back to him, the voices that swarmed his brain, the voices had driven him to do such terrible things. The voices had driven out his other side, the side he tried so hard to keep at bay with science and friendship and love. If Boffo removed his goggles now, though, would he be able to see the sweet, shy scientist he had fallen in love with, or would he see through his soul, into his other side? 

“Boffo,” Linksano suddenly whispered, clenching his gloved hand into a fist. “Do you…think I’m…a good person?”

 _What are you talking about?_ Boffo asked, his eyes widening with worry. _Of course I do, Oscar!_

“But why? I was a villainous scoundrel when you all first met me. Linkara only hired me under threat of sending me away if I did something bad, so obviously he didn’t trust me.”

 _He didn’t know you then, Oscar._ Boffo was quick to explain. _He wouldn’t still threaten to send you away now because he knows you’re a good person._

“How can any of you know that?” Linksano snapped, his fear setting him on edge. “How do you know that I won’t at any second snap and betray you or try to hurt you? How can you have such trust and faith in me? H-how can someone so g-good be in love with-with a monster!”

Boffo was startled to find himself pushed down onto their bed, with Linksano kneeling beside him, his head on Boffo’s lap and arms around Boffo’s waist, as he cried miserably. Linksano was saying things, things that made no sense and were choked with unrestrained emotion. 

Boffo flashed back to when Dan’s head was the one being cradled in his lap. Comforting him then had been difficult, but having to do the same to the man he loved more than anyone in the world was almost too much for him to bear. 

_Oscar, please don’t cry._ Boffo begged, feeling a sense of panic start to overtake him. _Please, Oscar, I just got you back and I’m so happy, I love you so much, but you mustn’t cry, please, please!_

Linksano gulped in huge breaths of air as he felt Boffo’s words atop his back and at once struggled to control himself. “I-I’m sorry, Boffo...I’m sorry...all I can do is h-hurt you after all,” he whimpered, trying to pull away from the clown. To his surprise, Boffo wrapped his arms around Linksano’s torso, lifted him up, and laid him gently across the bed before he settled down beside him, one hand gently stroking Linksano’s hair, the other cupping his damp cheek.

 _Oscar, you have never hurt me._ Boffo said, looking directly into Linksano’s eyes now. He forced his feelings of panic down and concentrated instead on assuaging the fears of his beloved. _You would never hurt me, could never hurt me. I know you, I know your heart, and I know that this is something you are incapable of doing._

“But...but what if I’m not me,” Linksano whispered, trembling slightly as he thought back to the voices which had so easily coaxed his madness back. “What if I give in...what if I become that person again who could so easily use and betray and hurt even those I l-love most?”

Boffo continued to gently stroke Linksano’s scalp, his eyes softening as his words grew tender. _I know you’re stronger than that, Oscar. You won’t become that person again. Everyone cares for you so much, and I know you care for them as well. Those feelings are enough to keep you the Oscar I know and love._

“You don’t know that,” Linksano murmured, trying again to turn away from Boffo. “You can’t know that. When I was gone, I...I almost gave in, Boffo.” Linksano closed his eyes, his words growing shaky as shame overwhelmed him. “It was that damned trial I went through...it showed me m-my heart’s desires, Boffo, and I...I would have hurt them all, everyone I love...what’s worse is, I almost hurt y-you.”

Boffo’s heart broke upon learning how far Linksano had been pushed, and he almost allowed the scientist to roll away from him, if that was what would bring him peace. He tightened his grip around Linksano, though, when he heard those last words. _You...almost hurt me, Oscar?_

“Yes,” Linksano groaned, feeling physical pain in his chest upon admitting that. “I would have done it if I hadn’t hurt myself instead...I just couldn’t hurt you.” Linksano looked up in surprise when Boffo suddenly pulled him close for a soft kiss but soon he was kissing back, enjoying how comforting and warm his lips felt. “W-why are you rewarding me for my failure?” he couldn’t help asking once Boffo pulled back. 

_Because it wasn’t a failure, Oscar. You stopped yourself from hurting me. You didn’t hurt the others either if everything you saw was a dream. You wouldn’t have passed that trial if what your heart truly wanted was to see all of us dead. That proves to me how strong you’ve honestly become._

Linksano stared at Boffo for a quiet moment, almost unable to comprehend how such a loving and forgiving person could feel anything but disdain for him, before he destroyed those negative thoughts by basking in Boffo’s words. He was not a monster. He was not a person who hurt those close to him. He was Oscar Schlumper, a man who was accepted and admired and important to others. He might not be good, but he was not bad, and most importantly, he was wanted, needed, and loved for who he was. 

“Thank you, my dearest Boffo,” Linksano whispered as he buried his face in Boffo’s neck, breathing in his comfortingly sweet scent as he started to relax for the first time in three months. “I think I might have never found this strength if it weren’t for you.”

 _I wouldn’t have found the strength to go on alone if not for you, Oscar._ Boffo replied, nuzzling him softly. _You will always be safe with me, and I know that I am always safe with you. I love you so much, my Oscar._

“I love you too, my Boffo.” Boffo sat up and began removing his shirt and tie, undressing himself as Linksano removed his own clothes. Boffo gently reached his hand out and this time Linksano did not flinch as he removed his goggles, showing him the warm, soulful blue eyes that Boffo treasured seeing more than anything else in life. He soothingly traced his fingers along Linksano’s body, checking that there were no new scars on Linksano’s delicate skin. Thankfully, he found none, and Boffo found himself being pulled on top of his boyfriend.

“You are always so good to me, Boffo. There is no one else I could ever share my heart fully with than you.”

Boffo smiled and kissed him softly. _I am so lucky to have it. I only wish I could be more like you, Oscar. I wish I had your courage._

“Ah, but you do.” Linksano ran his fingers through Boffo’s hair. “It took great courage to weather those lonely months on your own. I am so very proud of you.”

Boffo blushed and smiled as Linksano ran his fingers over his arm muscles. _Thank you, Oscar. You don’t know how much it means to me to hear that._

Linksano’s eyes took on a quality of longing and he gripped Boffo’s arms tightly. “Please, I need you, Boffo. I...I need to know that this is real and not just a blissful dream inside my own mind.”

Boffo wrapped his arms around him and granted his request, kissing softly along Linksano’s neck and relishing the tiny moans and squeaks that escaped his throat, his voice free of worry and containing only pleasure. _Anything for you, Oscar._

\-----

Dan was laying on 90s Kid’s bed, clinging to Tenderheart Bear for dear life, and slowly inhaling the scent of 90s Kid’s shampoo from the bear’s soft fur. This was it. Today was the day. That’s what Nimue had said, that the team should be arriving at some time today. After Dan had heard the news, he’d rushed right home to shower and shave and dress in his best suit, before returning to the base. Boffo had been kind enough to allow Dan to spend the night in 90s Kid’s room so that he could be there the second 90s Kid came back. Soon. It had to be soon. Dan had been waiting for so very long, all he could remember was waiting. But now, his waiting was almost over.

Dan smiled as he stroked Tenderheart’s furry head, remembering the day he’d given this bear to 90s Kid. That was the day they had both confessed their love for each other, the day Dan had completely given his heart to 90s Kid. 90s Kid. His sweet, kind, loving 90s Kid. His brave, strong, amazing 90s Kid, who would never give up the chance to be a hero. He’d been gone for three whole months, doing incredible amazing things, saving the world. As for Dan…what had he been doing during that time?

He’d completely fallen apart. He’d given up on everything he’d wanted to do, broken every promise he made to 90s Kid about staying strong and keeping himself healthy. He was disgusting, weak, pathetic… he didn’t deserve 90s Kid. It would only serve Dan right if 90s Kid never wanted to see him again after learning this sickening truth.

It would only serve him right if he never get to kiss 90s Kid and be filled with that surge of energy that was more powerful than any drug ever could be. It would serve him right if he would never get to hear 90s Kid tell him that he loved him again, if he never again felt 90s Kid’s arms holding him, protecting him from anything that could do him harm. What had Dan done to deserve any of that?

Dan pressed the plush bear into his face and moaned, a few tears starting to trickle down his cheeks. “I’m sorry, Kid-”

“Dan!” The voice was like a bolt of lightning electrifying his body, causing Dan to sit up and stare in shock, unsure if he could believe his eyes. It was as if all the color came back into his world, as if all the bright and shiny wonders this world had to offer were once more clear to see.

90s Kid was there, standing before him, alive and well, the same goofy grin that Dan loved more than anything plastered across his face.

“Kid?”

“Dan! Dan, it’s you! I’ve missed you so much!” 90s Kid lunged at the man, knocking him backwards onto the bed, as he wrapped his arms around him and kissed him fiercely. Dan kissed back just as eagerly, clinging tightly to the teen, wanting to melt into him and forget that they had ever been separated.

Eventually they grew a bit breathless and needed to pull apart for air, which is when 90s Kid noticed that Dan’s eyes were red and watery, and still leaking tears.

“Dude, it’s okay. I’m okay, I promise,” 90s Kid said as he squeezed him tightly again, kissing the top of Dan’s head soothingly. 

“I-I was just s-so s-scared!” Dan cried, his words quickly becoming sobs. “I-I thought I’d n-never see you again! I-I thought you were h-hurt or that y-you w-were d-d-dead!”

“Shhh. I’m here, Dan,” 90s Kid soothed softly. “None of that junk happened. I’m not hurt or dead at all.”

“Thank God!” Dan moaned, so weak with happiness now that he was practically melting into the mattress. 90s Kid used what remained of his strength to pull Dan closer, where the two lay entwined in each other’s embraces. Dan couldn’t stop crying or kissing 90s Kid now, and 90s Kid kissed him back while stroking his back and soothing him gently. “I-I-I was g-going crazy without you! Oh K-Kid! Kid I love you! I love you, Kid!”

“I love you too, Dan,” 90s Kid murmured against the side of Dan’s neck before he nuzzled and kissed it gently, hoping to relax the older man. “It’s okay now. I’m here. I’m home. I’m with you, just like I’m supposed to be, and I’m not going anywhere, dude. I’m staying right here with you cuz I...I m-missed you so much, D-D-Dan...” 90s Kid turned his head, not wanting to upset Dan further with his own tears, but Dan quickly tilted his head back toward his before kissing 90s Kid deeply. 

“I-I missed you too,” Dan said with a sniffle before he nuzzled against his cheek. “It was so hard...so painful without you, Kid.”

“I know, dude.” 90s Kid nuzzled Dan’s cheek in response before he displayed a proud smile. “But Boffo told me how strong you were, Dan. He said you were totally strong and brave and awesome, just like I knew you’d be.”

Dan quickly looked down, ashamed. “I wasn’t strong, Kid. Without you here, I almost fell apart.”

“What do you mean?”

Dan gulped and pulled down the collar of his shirt, revealing his neck. 90s Kid studied it, frowning when he noticed several scratches and faint marks along the skin. “What happened, Dan?” he wondered, faintly tracing along the healed wounds with his fingers.

Dan shuddered before swallowing thickly. “I-I did that. I was…out of my mind without you. Usually I can ignore the cravings because I can throw myself into being with you, but when you were gone and I had no way to talk to you, or know if you were even okay, I-I couldn’t handle it. I started thinking about all these horrible things that might have happened to you, and I needed to stop, so I focused on something else: pain. It’s worked for me before, when I didn’t have any access to drugs, so I tried it again.” He admitted in a shamed voice.

90s Kid’s stomach turned as he imagined Dan hurting himself, but he quickly pressed a kiss to one of Dan’s wounds and tried to smile.

“That wasn’t a good thing to do, Dan, but I understand how scared you were, and I’m glad you stopped. I bet Boffo helped you with that kind of stuff, right?”

Dan’s eyes closed, his shame growing. “Boffo…I was terrible to him, Kid. He only tried to help me, him and Ted and Dolly, but I refused to let them. For a long time I stayed hidden away from the world, trapped in my room, not doing anything or seeing anyone. I-I even stopped going to my meetings.”

90s Kid’s face grew alarmed. “You what? Oh Dan, how could you do that?”

“I don’t know,” Dan moaned, rolling over so he didn’t have to face 90s Kid’s upset stare. “I don’t know what I was doing or thinking! I was so lost without you, Kid, and I almost ruined everything! One night I ran out of the house, blew a huge chunk of money, and I…I almost...used again.” Dan let out another sob and curled into an even smaller ball. He’d had to confess, he couldn’t hide anything from the man he loved, but now he had to face the consequences of his decisions.

“Dan,” 90s Kid said, his voice low and serious. “I’m very disappointed and sad to know that happened. You’ve been so strong and good at staying clean all this time; how could you almost do that again? Not just to yourself but to us?” His voice sounded pained, which hurt worse than any cut Dan had given to himself.

Dan whimpered, burying his face in his hands. “I’m sorry…I’m s-sorry…I-I told you I w-wasn’t strong…I-I’m so w-weak and helpless…I’m nothing without you…b-but I don’t deserve you…s-so you can h-have…your ring b-back, Kid.”

With shaking hands, Dan tried to remove the beautiful band of silver and red from his finger, before he stilled when larger, warmer hands covered his.

“I don’t want your ring, Dan. I gave it to you and it’s yours forever now. If you give it back, I’d just have to go find another one, and I do not have the cash to shower you in jewelry right now, dude.”

Dan rolled back over to look up at 90s Kid in shock, taking in his soft, warm smile in confusion. He had removed his sunglasses now and allowed Dan to see his calm blue eyes, though one was a bit swollen at the moment.

“I-I don’t understand. Aren’t you b-breaking up with me?” Dan winced just at the thought of losing 90s Kid, which caused the teen to bend down and kiss him again.

“I wouldn’t propose if I wasn’t totally sure about this, Dan. I may be sad and hurt and a little mad about what happened, but I love you, man. I love you so much that I can’t imagine not being with you. That hurts way more than what you did.”

“B-but I almost wrecked everything,” Dan protested.

“Yeah, but then you didn’t, Dan,” 90s Kid replied. “Even though you wanted to, you still stayed clean all this time.”

“Only because Boffo and Ted stopped me!”

“That doesn’t matter,” 90s Kid insisted firmly. “Even the strongest dudes and dudettes need help to be strong sometimes, Dan. Once Boffo and Ted helped you recover, you kept away from that junk again, right? That totally takes strength in my eyes, dude.”

Dan’s eyes filled with tears again. “You’re the one who should be called strong, Kid. What I’ve been through is nothing compared to what you’ve been through.”

“Dude, the stuff you went through is still totally harsh and important,” 90s Kid tried to reassure him, but he fell silent when Dan reached out to gently touch the swollen skin around his eye, looking at it with dismay. 

“You’re the one who’s been through something harsh. You worked so hard to protect the world that you were hurt...I’m so sorry you had to suffer like this for us, Kid.” Dan wanted to ask what happened to 90s Kid to cause the injury, but he didn’t want to stir up bad memories for 90s Kid so soon after he’d returned. They’d have that conversation another day.

90s Kid caught Dan’s hand and brought it to his lips. “It’s okay, Dan. I’d suffer a million black eyes if it meant I could be sure you and everyone else were safe. Don’t worry about that junk, though, cuz it doesn’t hurt now. Nothing hurts now that I’m with you again.”

Dan moaned softly before he wrapped himself once again around the younger man and began kissing and touching him in an eager yet gentle way. 90s Kid also started lightly roaming his hands all over Dan’s body, frowning in worry at what he felt. “Dude, you look kinda pale and you’ve lost weight again.”

“N-not that pale, Kid, and not that much weight...” Dan mumbled shyly, running his fingers along 90s Kid’s arm in a bashful manner. 

90s Kid held Dan tighter and buried his face in his neck. “Oh, dude, don’t worry. I promise I’m here to stay and I’m gonna take good care of you again. I’m gonna make sure you eat well and sleep good and start feeling better so you won’t hurt anymore. I’m really sorry I was g-gone so long, Dan. I w-wish I could have been here p-protecting you...” The tears finally started to show and 90s Kid let out a choked sob. All of his emotions had been held in for the sake of the mission, and now his defenses were at last breaking. 

Dan held 90s Kid as tight as he could in his thin arms, kissing along his neck in an attempt to calm him now. “It’s alright, Kid. I know you’re going to take care of me, you always keep me safe. I’ve got you, Kid. You’ve taken care of me all this time, and I’m so grateful. You can let it out, sweetie...” Dan had already had his moment to break down, now it was his turn to let 90s Kid have his emotional release. 

90s Kid did feel better as Dan held him and simply let him cry, even though he hated crying. Finally, he sniffled and pulled back, wiping his swollen eyes with his t-shirt. “I love you, D-Dan,” he murmured as he pressed his lips to his again, crawling on top of his boyfriend. “I l-love you so much.” 90s Kid didn’t think about anything else at the moment, only knowing that he needed to show Dan how much he cared for him as soon as possible.

“I love you too, Kid,” Dan whispered, feeling his body grow light and floaty with euphoria as they were both stripped of any barriers that lay between them. He kissed 90s Kid over and over, finally feeling safe as 90s Kid whispered loving words into his ear. 

With 90s Kid home, lying in his arms, Dan at last found the love he had craved for so long. He needed 90s Kid more than food or water, more than air or cocaine, or anything else in the world. 

“I love you so much...m-my hero...my 90s Kid...”

\-----

Harvey sighed in contentment as he lay back on his bed. “Ah, this is the life. I should never go without the finer things this long ever again. Whaddya say, Kid? Should I order up some wine, caviar, and a pair of masseurs for the both of us?”

Linkara chuckled as he started to undress for bed. “You must be feeling better if you’re already thinking about your next shopping spree. I think we can skip the first two, but I wouldn’t say no to a massage.”

“I’d offer, but I’m still not feeling a hundred percent,” Harvey joked, before breaking off in coughing fit. 

Linkara frowned and quickly reached out to touch his arm. “You okay? You want me to get you some cough drops?”

“No, I-I’m fine,” Harvey said, shaking his head as he caught his breath once again. “Seriously, Kid, don’t worry. After what we all went through in that kooky world, this is nothing.” Harvey looked down then, and Linkara realized he hadn’t gotten the chance to talk with him about his trial. 

“Are you sure…you’re alright?” Linkara asked slowly, sitting down beside the older man on the bed and looking to him in concern. “Back there it looked like you went through something pretty rough.”

Harvey sighed, laying back against the pillows as he was forced to remember what he’d encountered in his trial. “If I gotta be honest with you, Kid...the water was probably the easiest part.” Linkara reached for his hand, silently urging Harvey to continue. “While I was in there, I kept hearing voices of my own, telling me to just give up, stop fighting, let myself drown.”

Linkara squeezed his hand. “But you didn’t listen.”

Harvey closed his eyes. “It was hard not to.”

Linkara instantly looked concerned. “Why was it hard?”

“You...did you see the stuff I was holding, Kid? The stuff I plugged the hole with?”

Linkara shook his head. “We couldn’t see what you were doing, it was invisible to us.”

“I figured that. It was all clothes, clothes of all you cats. Ninja’s mask, the Doc’s goggles, your jacket, your hat...Charlie’s school jacket...” Linkara squeezed his hand tightly. “I got to look at that jacket for the first time in so many years...got to touch it...then I saw...saw his hospital gown.” Linkara’s eyes widened with horror. “It brought everything back; Kid...all the pain he was in...the way I just had to sit there and w-watch him die...” Tears leaked out of Harvey’s eyes. “I saw it and I just w-wanted to give up...I just wanted to see him again and make it all stop hurting...”

“Oh Harvey...” Linkara leaned in close and hugged Harvey tightly. “I’m so sorry you went through that. I didn’t want you to start hurting again.”

“I know, Kid, I know,” Harvey murmured, breathing heavily as he worked to control himself. “It’s okay now...it’s not hurting so much now.”

Linkara knew Harvey was putting on a brave front for his sake. He bent down and kissed his lips softly. “Really, Kid, it’s okay.” Harvey closed his eyes, another tear sliding down his cheek. “He wouldn’t have wanted me to give up either. He’s waiting to see me again, but not now...now I’ve got other people depending on me, so it’s okay. I’ll see Charlie again one day but for now, I’m so lucky to have you and Junior and everyone else in my life.”

Linkara traced a finger softly down Harvey’s cheek, brushing the warm water away. ”I never thought those trials would be so torturous.” Linkara thought back to the ways in which Linksano, Ninja, and 90s Kid had been hurt, and felt somewhat lucky about what he’d been forced to endure in comparison. “I’m really sorry, Harvey. I’m sorry about so many things...I didn’t want any of you to go through all of that crap.”

“I know you didn’t, Kid,” Harvey said, nuzzling against the younger man as he continued to wipe the tears away. “I’m not blaming you...I know everything we went through was for the good of the mission.”

“I want to believe that,” Linkara muttered as he settled down beside Harvey, pulling him close once again. 

“Of course it was, Kid,” Harvey insisted, the words bolstering his spirits as much as Linkara’s. “We kept that evil dame and her mooks from getting a very dangerous weapon. Even though it hurt, going through all that protected a lot of people.”

“I just...I wish I could have protected you better.” Linkara looked away as he started to tear up, his body shaking lightly. “I’m so sorry Harvey. I should never have let you get captured. All of this mess was my own damn fault...I d-don’t even know how you guys can d-depend on me as a leader anymore...”

“Kid, we trust you as a leader because you’re one of the greatest people we know,” Harvey reassured, holding Linkara as tightly as he could. “We’d follow you to the ends of the earth if you wanted us to.”

“I know that, and that’s what scares me,” Linkara confessed, tears sliding down his cheeks. “Y-you all really would do anything for me...even w-when I don’t know what I’m d-doing...I lost my mind during my trial. I nearly got m-myself killed and I...oh God, I attacked 90s Kid,” Linkara let out a sob as he remembered this, his body shaking harder. “H-how could I have done something like that? I h-hurt everyone on this team!”

“Hey, hey,” Harvey said softly, kissing him to still his words. “Junior knows that you weren’t yourself, and you’re going to be able to make things right with him soon. And my getting taken was not your fault, Kid,” Harvey said seriously, stroking his cheek. “You saved me just like I knew you would. You’re a hero, Linkara.”

Linkara sniffled and tried to listen to Harvey’s words. “I-I just try to do what’s best for the world, every day...b-but I’m just an ordinary man, Harvey. I don’t know how all of you don’t realize that.”

“You’re far from ordinary, Kid. I’ve never met anyone else like you, someone who cares about the world and everyone in it so much. Someone who took in so many people out of the kindness of his heart and stitched them into a team, and a family.” Harvey’s eyes grew watery again, but he was smiling. “Don’t ever think that you’re not a good man.”

“I...I want to be good,” Linkara admitted, sniffling again a little. “I try so hard, but I know I’m a jackass a lot of the time...”

“We all have our bad moments, Linkara,” Harvey continued to reassure him as he held tight to the younger man. “What’s important is that you’re sorry for what happened and that you’re gonna do your best to make things right with the others.”

“I will,” Linkara quickly agreed, smiling as Harvey dabbed at his face with his handkerchief. “I’ll make it up to 90s Kid and everyone else. I swear I will, Harvey!”

Harvey smiled at him proudly. “That’s the hero I know and love. You mean so much to me and to the others, Linkara. Never forget that no matter what happens, we’re all in this together. We’re more than just a team, we’re family, and we love each other through good times and bad.”

“I love you so much, Harvey.” Linkara pressed close to the singer, kissing him eagerly, passionately, wanting to convey the depths of his feelings through his actions. Harvey eagerly responded before pulling back and coughing again. “Are you okay?” Linkara quickly asked as he reached for the bag of cough drops he’d brought in with them. “I’m sorry, Harvey.”

“D-don’t ever be sorry for laying one on me,” Harvey joked before popping the cherry flavored medicine drop in his mouth. “Normally I’d be all for it, but just give me a day and I promise I’ll return that smooch with a vengeance.”

Linkara laughed and rested his head against Harvey’s shoulder as he pulled up the blankets around them. “I’ll hold you to that, hon, but for now let’s get some rest.” Harvey nodded and shifted slightly so he could wrap his arms around Linkara’s body, wanting to fall asleep while holding his boyfriend. “I really love you,” Linkara repeated softly, his hands sliding atop Harvey’s and holding steady.

“I love you too, Linkara. I’m glad we’re finally home.”


End file.
